Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

F**K HALF the Crab Feast! The Mommy Dome happily welcomes fellow podcaster and comedian, well-dressed man, Jay Larson AKA Bunt Cake. Larson is a guy that makes you feel good cause he's a man of the people. We talk about Kai The Hitchhiker and the crazy audio he provided that is sweeping the web Smash, SmaSH, SMASH! Plus clubs that we love to work, nicknames for our beloved, how gross boogies are,...

Ian Bagg is now a U.S. citizen and we treat him accordingly. We discuss what's permissable to say as a comedian and whether comics should be held accountable for what they say on stage and the culture of today's clubs in general. Also, Indian people will rape you - in large numbers. Loud people on planes should be kicked off and fully investigated by our government, people who dress terribly have...

This episode will have your jeans in a super high twist! There's no berries like Sherry's berries. Imposters need not apply (Terry). We read your emails and discuss Tom's beard flakes. What reality shows are you watching? And a very special phone call with Top Dog that will have you looking at public restrooms in a whole new way. And we take your phone calls and give you love advice. 2 Mommies 1 J...

If you have a family that is overflowing with talent then you need to have a vision for the journey so the spirits can come together and be a business. That's a quote. Sort of. Listen to how the Will and Jada Smith's run their household. Be sure to have a bucket nearby - you might get sick. Some actors are also too talented for their own good, like Jared Leto or a pile of horse sh*t. Egos of this...

Guess who is OUR new best friend? Yeah, it's Alison Rosen and soon you will be calling her DEAREST MOMMY. Alison fit in like a new pair of extra tight jeans. She's not only a co-host on Adam Carolla and host of Alison Rosen Is Your New Best Friend, she's also Up for the Get Down and a total pro on the mic. It's so fun that we talked longer than usual and cover everything from Alison's new engageme...

Chang chong ping pong! Guess who's back? It's the great Yoshi! This is by far one of the craziest episodes we've ever done. Yoshi goes deep. Deep into his mind, soul, and past. He shares a lot and it's fantastic, compelling, terrifying, sad and hilarious all at once. What a guest! There's no way we can describe everything we talk about, but here are some key words: Porn, fighting, death, fleeing,...

Some people make your P***y dry! Who does that in your life? Now let them know. Good job. We talk about regrets in life, how awful some audience members can be, how awesome others are, but the big news is that our sushi server who berates for ordering too much is caught on tape giving us the biz! The real scoop is that we really don't order that much, this woman just hates us and everyone who orde...

Due to Blueban's incompentance this episode had to be re-recorded. Oh, Blueban! Unfortunately it means that a mommy is missing. Christina is out, but step-mommy, Ryan Sickler fills in and brings the fun, filth, and funny that he always does. Tom and Ryan discuss uncomfortable moments with fans, bizarre sexual experiences and requests, the NFL, the Name of The Year contest, a twitter prank, Would Y...

Well if you aren't my mommy then who are you? Tommy spent the weekend in NYC with his close celebrity friends (no big deal) and shares his love for the great big ol' apple (is that the expression?). We revisit Tom's mom's obsession with everything Wu-Tang. Christina fixates on why she routinely tortures herself with caffeine and toothbrushes, while Tom does the same with his fingers. We discuss ou...

Bill "Gingery" Burr enters the mommy dome for a lengthy, laugh-filled conversation. A true sportsman, Burr talked football with Tom until Christina started snoring. The three talked comedy - mainly Burr's stories of hanging at the Comedy Cellar in NYC and everything that was great (and terrifying) about being around the late Patrice O'Neal. We talk about shit-talking online and when people share t...

Yoooooooo! We got some jammy jams for yo you know what. Plus we examine the age old question - "How loud is annoying when having an orgasm?" Yup, that's too much. We appreciate each and every one of you "Little Mommies" and this episode we show that appreciation by talking to one of you on the phone and giving a shout out to many more! It idn't Greazy or nuttin. Jeans Connection is no longer a mys...

Crime fighting extraordinaire, Armenian revolutionary, self-proclaimed deviant and somehow still good guy, Sam Tripoli is in the Mommy Dome. When "Trips" is in the room it's a non-stop party from beginning to end. We talk shop and having a gambling dad who "smashes black ass," nightmare gigs, strippers and so much more. Sammy also comes close to breaking records on Tom or Black, plus Dental Update...

There ain't no half-steppin' or half chargin nothing especially when your baby's daddy is in the house! The Full Charge, Matt Fulchiron is all up in the Dome. We catch up with our old comrade about bad music, loud crazy people on planes, and the wonder of pain that is having 2 or 3 in you. The NEW BIKES! shirt is here and we revisit the classic clip from Scared Straight. Plus the Top Dog call to e...

These jeans need a wash. After a weeklong mini-tour of the South the mommies are back home and telling you how it all went down. Fast food and faster dumps. A pee latch for you car? Super fans and super douche bags - it's all out there. We talk about the joy of BBQ sauce and the horror of long drives and we even have to continue giving you that Jada Pinkett Knowledge, knaw meen? Twitter haters, we...

Joe Bartnick is a man. The kind of man the you can easily imagine having his way with you. He is large and powerful and most likely stronger than you and capable of forcing you to do what he wants you to. Sorry if now you think Joe Bartnick is going to make you blow him. Joe is also a hilarious comic and a kind soul. Joe is a comics comic that loves to shoot the shit and talk shop which is exactly...

Your 2 dearest mothers welcome the lovely and hilarious Felicia Michaels into the Mommy Dome. We discuss what it's like to work with Joey Diaz on her podcast, Beauty and The Beast, what it was like to WIN Star Search, and Felicia weighs in on the "Oil in the road/I own the road" & "Retarded/Retard" debate! A speacial Labor Day edition of Fill Her Up/Seal Her Shut, plus Real Talk and more! Hit your...

Do you smoke crack? Exactly. Canadian jeans step up and do the dew! We love audio that paints a picture. We have some that straight up blasts your face! If you can squirt, let us know how you do it - for realsies. We rank chocolate candy treats and Tina ranks Almond Joy at the BOTTOM! Do you think she's a communist???? Bunz strongly disagrees. Which country makes the best, most delicious chocolate...

Don't worry - she's here! The MAIN MOMMY. Is it Tina or is it Tommy? Hmmmm. Discuss amongst yourselves. Is it true what Webster said, is there truly only ONE mommy??? These questions need answers. The jeans are back from Holiday and Tommy has the cough to prove it! Tina drops science and gas AGAIN. How long will she keep her streak alive? Tommy may incorporate some magic into a new act he's planni...

You're the man now, dawg! Tommy and Tina talk about their recent travels and how lame it is to watch old dudes hit on young girls by trying to sound like they're young too. The lesson: act your age or better yet - just do you, dawg. Christina admits to knowing nothing about current affairs and especially about Kennebunkport. The real treat here is Top Dog gives gold. He talks farts, brown, toilet...

Bring the muthafuckin Ruckus! Tom and Christina drop science on you so open up your journals and take notes! We begin with some friendly banter regarding our different tastes in music to warm your ears. Then the moment you've all been waiting for arrives - Tom talks about his trip with Top Dog which includes audio immediately after Top Dog shit his pants. It's a special moment for Tom and all of o...

Tommy and Tina announce a big plan for international shows! Get ready, Africa! They talk Top Dog as well as Tom's sister and mother complete with tons of impressions - hold on to your nuts, fans of impressions! Dental Update galore with your listener emails including one that includes a breakthrough innovation (that will surely earn him billions)! We talk about sober braggers - who never shut up a...

Happy Thanksgiving! What are you thankful for? Hopefully, having Tommy and Tina in your life is at the top! If not, we hope you have a horrible holiday season. If your idea of celebrating thanksgiving is talking about suicide and death and how life will leave you any moment then this is the episode for you. Bryan Erwin is an old friend who should have been on the show AGES ago and now he's finally...

Nothing can prepare your ears for the Mad Flavor that is Joey "Coco" Diaz. Christina and Tom are elated to sit back and have their Uncle Joey share stories of crime, Hollywood, sex, and most importantly, taking dumps outside. You will only wish this episode never ended as Joey has us laughing for the entire duration. Pull your jeans up! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoice...

U-N-I-T-Y! The original trio is back! Tom and Christina couldn't be happier to welcome Redban into the mommydome for the first time since their VERY public and VERY ugly breakup! Things start off badly as Redban had to be restrained after trying to fight Blueban. After his anger and jealousy of Blueban subsides you get an instant classic episode. Lots of love and laughs with Podfather. Get ready f...

If you're a big dog how about you play with dogs your size, you stupid, selfish inconsiderate C**T. But if you're a dog you might not know where you are playing because DO DOGS EVEN HAVE BRAINS?!? We investigate. Loud, gay sex sounds and terrifying and hilarious. Since we didn't get you the SF Bonus ep, we give it to you here! Groan more! A big, BURNING Dental Update will have you smiling wide and...