Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

The Water GOD is back in the building. Before we get to more hydrating satisfaction we have some GOOD stuff for you.  And nothing kicks things off like diarrhea. Public diarrhea. Have you ever just, you know, gone. In plain view. I'd like to hear about it.  We have MORE Machines Within and some NEW She's Retarded tracks.  Grab a bottle of mineral water and ENJOY! Learn more about your ad choices....

Yo! Tommy got a Lambo wit the brains blown out! Naw, he didn't. But he made Bert and Ari think he did and that was worth every penny. We give you the full scoop on that PLUS we find a good potential roommate for you. All you need is a strong sex drive and, well, we should just let him explain. Seems like a nice guy.  We also have the KING farting on his dog. Is this okay? And Steven Seagal isn't j...

The great Greg Fitzsimmons is here! You know his book, his podcast, his radio show and his stand up. He's absolutely one of our favorites and he will be one of yours if you listen to this episode. Lots of crazy, lots of funny, Machines Within and of course a Dental Update. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you want to get really horny and you're having trouble getting there we've got the secret formula for you (okay it involves Benadryl). But we're not telling you how many (unless you listen to the episode).  Plus, Machines Within probably won over your heart last week. This week, it's a chart-toppin banger thanks to the many musically inclined mommy's out there.  And just when you thought Mr. Ru...

This is one of the most fun Pomcasts we've done in a while and it's just Jean and I.  We do what we do best - make fun of people. From the c*m huggers to the people who struggle to string together a sentence we simply don't hold back.  When a juggalo dreams of writing a new song, well, DJ Dadmouth helps make that dream come true - IN THE MOMENT. Is there a hit on our hands?  Don't forget to watch...

What does 338 pounds of alcohol free fun sound like? Download this podcast to find out. We had to remove a wall on our home so the crane could lift him up and place him in his seat, but we couldn't be happier we did it. Enormous, but fun comedian Burnt Khrysler is in studio for a very real very honest and very funny conversation.  Seriously though, Bert is the best and we love him. This is one of...

If you had 3 foot long nails how could you wipe your bum? Luckily we have a detailed example from a gross person.  The great Tom Papa joins us for some good ol' making fun of people get down.  We have your emails and they are very offensive - thank you for sending them.  PLUS, if you're white and you get a great tan, are you now black? One completely insane person thinks so.  Pull those jeans up!...

If you go on a run and you gotta make a brown is that really such a bad thing? One lady in Colorado Springs might do in on your lawn in front of your family! NEATO! Tommy shot a special in Denver over the weekend. We recap the festivities for you PLUS now Tina is the one with sick jeans.  Dad boner with a snow blower? Yes. We have great emails from you and more.   Learn more about your ad choices....

When you make a Big Brown do you flush it down? Here at YMH we show it proudly. Our Big Brown can even talk - it's wild.  We have stinky Vajees and how to detect them, we have surprise Big D's and obvious ones too - Hello, Takeo Spikes! All around good fun with our bud, Brendan Schaub.  Plus a DENTAL UPDATE and a whole lot more.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is how it's done. The South Florida mom's came out in full force and we had the best time.  We hope you enjoy this live episode that featured Fill Her Ups, Would You Rather's and so much more.  Make sure you put on sunblock under your jeans before you listen to this one, Jean. It was after all recorded in Breast Balls Beach, Florida.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adcho...

Uh oh, it's time to get your act together. Your baby's father, The Concierge, is in the building. If you don't know, now you do. Matt Fulchiron AKA The Full Charge is back and in top form.  We break it down. Everything.  How embarrassed would you be if you made poo in someone's bed? We found someone that doesn't seem that mad. Are all women Ho's in the context that this man explains? is digital Bl...

If you're ever attacked you should consider biting your attacker below the waist! But only after you seduce him into thinking you're into him sexually. We recommend an hour or more to really trick them! Plus, Why are some farts hot? Why do those smell more?  AND are you willing to wait in line to eat somewhere good? No thanks, Jean.  When you visit Singapore keep an eye out for an older, gay, how...

What if you wipe yourself with toilet water to save paper but you flush a bunch so you're actually wasting water? Can you really say you care about the environment? Not sure, but you're definitely probably vegan. Plus, when blind people dream do they "see" what we do? Only twins with different sized penis can help us answer these important questions.  We get the stories the OTHER podcasts choose t...

What if it's only smells, but also it turns you on? Is that okay? What kind of smells get your engine going? Ladies, we're talking to you.  PLUS, when Dad Boners are into animals and by animals we mean bees, it's borderline disturbing.  AND the great Ms. Pat is back for amazing, honest and absolutely hilarious conversation. Her new book, RABBIT: THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF MS PAT goes on sale August 22nd...

We want you guys to orgasm all the time, even when you hug someone or shake their hand or just stand up. That's our mission and we hope this episode guides you to the forbidden place where we live.  We have some great listener emails this episode PLUS a dad boner that gives Canadian highway dad a run for his money.  And a white girl that uses BIG WORDS prompts a debate - Do you ever accept white p...

Thank God for feminists like Roman who are out there every day fighting the good fight. He's out in the streets encouraging women to fart in his face. If it weren't for guys like him, would ladies even know they could fart??? Plus, TOP DOG gets on a call to go over a recent "ACCIDENT."  Did you knoe R Kelly actually wanted to marry his mom?  AND the great YOSHI joins once again for more of his hil...

Some women associate giving birth with PAIN. Are they dumb? Maybe they just haven't been taught yet. They SHOULD be having orgasms. That's what childbirth is all about.  PLUS, could Tommy's REAL mom be the fart mistress we've all wanted?  AND special guest Brent Weinbach joins us.  You wanna talk some s**t? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When Tommy boy arrived in Los Angeles with hope in his eyes, it was Sam Tripoli who made Tom sit on the casting couch and earn his stage time thru butt spreads and oral favors. Kidding! That's a dream (for both guys).  Sam Tripoli is a tornado on stage and off. Check out his new double album, The Diabolical and his numerous podcasts, including Punch Drunk and his new conspiracy theory podcast, Tin...

We have found a secret that even Wikileaks couldn't get. There is a man who may or may not be Ryan Sickler that gave a chocolate kiss to Hillary Clinton and we have the DETAILS! You are NOT ready.  PLUS, would any of you like to come over for moose soup later? What if we smoked two packs a day and slept with the whole village? Okay, see you at 7! Two hot new joints make this episode the kind you j...

You have to be careful with a penis when it's really big cause you might end up dead! This South Florida man is really in a tough place (murder charge) because of it.  Plus how many people/hours does it take for Johnny Depp to get ready? Let's take a guess! AND special guest Wheeler Walker Jr. joins us and blows us away with his amazing voice and beautiful voice. Ol' Wheeler has got some pipes on...

When a longshoreman doesn't feel like talking, you better get to walking or you're gonna get trespassing. That's just the way it goes.  Plus, your feedback is boring in for Christina's Fart Mistress Shed. Will she go thru with it?  AND we have a new awful work song. It's really quite depressing. Hope you enjoy it! The real news is Ari Shaffir is not only back from his vision quest, he's actually H...

It's here in all its glory - episode 400 of Your Mom's House! And finally we face the question that has been bugging us all - will Christina BaBoey Chusay Oh Tom's B-Hole? A real conversation takes place.  PLUS, will Tina start a side business in a shed?  Is there someone out there who laughs as hard as Top Dog at awful jokes?  We have those answers and more! Pull em up! Learn more about your ad c...

There's a wise, older Asian man that can have an orgasm without ejactulating and every time he shakes from within his prostate it's like watching a parade: pure, unadulterated joy.  Aside from that this episode is full of fun. We have a man that uses ALL the Big Words he can think of, PLUS a job orientation that rivals the infamous Let's Get Social song.  We have a follow up on Shaq's biggest "toe...

Do you like heavy breathing into the mic? CHECK! What about laughing uncontrollably at street jokes? BOOM! Anybody poop their pants lately? You guessed it, Top Dog is in the building and he brought his Peruvian princess with him.  Before we get to that we've got people marrying themselves and buildings, plus what's the opposite of a happy Dad Boner? Is it Dad Rage? Whatever it is, we found him too...

Oh Snap! We got the PodFather. The Mighty and Powerful Joe Rogan joins us to discuss all things JEAN.  From the crazy current state of politics to some all time dad boner moments, Joe weighs in on it all.  He even answers the question: Would you date your mom?  Spark one up and pour some out, this is an all-time classic.  Pull em up! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices