What People Miss

Let's Talk Respectability Politics In this episode, I open a heartfelt conversation about respectability politics and the myth of imposter syndrome. We’ve been told that imposter syndrome is something we must “fix” within ourselves—especially if we are women, mothers, creatives, or leaders who dare to do life differently. But what if the real issue is not within us at all? I explore how the world...

Love Awakened: Healing the Blockages That Keep You From Love Love isn’t something we chase—it’s something we remember. In this soul-stirring conversation, I sit down with Renee Miller , Founder of The Love Camp and my co-creator of the Love Awakened Retreat for Women , to explore the invisible barriers that keep us from experiencing the fullness of love. We unpack how trauma, self-protection, and...

Summary In this conversation, Zaha Aljabri and James Faghmous discuss the various factors that rob people of their joy, particularly focusing on capitalism and its associated beliefs. They explore the importance of recognizing one's true nature and spiritual intelligence as a means to reconnect with joy. The discussion also touches on parenting in a capitalistic society, cultural expectations, and...

In this enlightening conversation, Willie J and I delve into the concept of pleasure, exploring its foundations, the importance of awareness and responsibility in seeking joy, and the transformative power of detachment. How do you do that in these times? Are there practices that you are missing or could deepen? You will enjoy this riveting exchanges between mature believers of different dogma choo...

The Whole Tantrum Party Feeling with Community. Subscribe here. In this opening season episode, I outline reasons to have a whole tantrum. You may think that is not very mature or sensible and I beg to differ. Listen to the six reasons you need to have a whole tantrum and my further invitation to experience that with me.  This episode also serves as the guide for season 2 and the conversation...

Why Rage is Required for Your Ultimate Joy!  This episode is about extreme feelings that are available to open you up to your core for your ultimate joy. How are you using your rage? Are you using it? I also wrote more about this in my substack. Subscribe, comment and enjoy! https://open.substack.com/pub/cordeliagaffar/p/why-rage-is-required?r=1z8t8j&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&a...

What if the way you show up in the world—on stage, on camera, or even in your daily life—wasn’t about performing… but about being fully, unapologetically YOU? In this powerful and soul-nourishing conversation, I sit down with Lucy Devi Hall, a visibility and public speaking coach who helps entrepreneurs fall in love with how they show up. Lucy’s unique approach blends emotional strategy, embodied...

“Joy is a lifestyle, not something you buy.” – Richard Noel In this week’s What People Miss , we’re talking about how to live joyfully, intentionally, and in alignment with your true self . My guest Richard Noel — sound therapist, musician, and joy advocate — reveals how: ✔ Incantations reprogram your mind faster than affirmations ✔ Your mood is your Wi-Fi (it affects every connection you have) ✔...

  "We Can Catch This Healing" – A Conversation on Wholeness, Vulnerability & Black Masculinity 🎙️✨ In this powerful and heartfelt episode, I sit down with Bernard to reflect on my guest-hosting experience at King’s Corner —the virtual sanctuary created by Black Men Heal in Philadelphia. Together, we open the door to raw, liberating dialogue on what it truly means for Black men to feel sa...

In this deeply nourishing conversation, the Queen and I embark on an intimate exploration of what it truly means for Black women over 50 to reclaim their wholeness . Together, we dive into the rich layers of Black women's sexual liberation, the healing power of community and co-regulation, and the often unspoken impact of colorism on self-identity and desirability. We unravel the myth that worthin...

In this powerful and liberating conversation, Cordelia sits down with Mx. Queen, LCSW, M.Ed., a somatic sex therapist and founder of the Erospirituality Centre, to explore the depths of Black sexual liberation, erotic intelligence, and the sacred intersection of spirituality and sexuality. Together, they unpack the critical distinctions between sex, sexuality, and sexual liberation—and why underst...

In this powerful and timely episode of Jewels of Juneteenth , I sit down with Coach E., a seasoned Functional Movement Specialist who has helped over 3,000 clients reclaim strength and ease chronic pain. Together, we dive deep into the layered intersections of functional movement, emotional wellness, and the often-overlooked impact of racism on the body. Coach E. shares his lived experience as a B...

 In this episode of Jewels of Juneteenth, I get to discuss segregation, the dreams we lost, and the power we may be missing today with E. Bernard Alexander. Whilst everyone is up in arms about the future of DEI, we ask a challenging and thought-provoking question: Are we missing the gifts of segregation—the ability to empower ourselves, heal our communities, and align with our divine purpose?...

What People Miss is a podcast about living life by noticing the subtleties. Like Mozart said, "The music is not in the notes, but in the space between them". The theme for the month of June is the Jewels of Juneteenth.  In this interview, I am interviewing Tiffany Wright, the Founder of BOBC, Blacked Owned Business Community. Highlights: Why is there a need for BOBC? How does the Black busine...

Are you wearing your crown and creating your life—or simply waiting to see what life gives you? Here’s the truth: It is your birthright to choose. To savor—not just survive. To feel—not just function. To rise—not only react. As we welcome June and prepare to honor Juneteenth, let’s recognize this holiday for more than a moment in time. Let’s use it as a mirror and a map —revealing where we’ve been...

In this conversation, Abeo Noel and I explore the multifaceted concept of self-care, emphasizing its importance in personal well-being and relationships. We discuss the necessity of recognizing one's own needs, the role of retreats in self-discovery, and the connection between self-care and pleasure. We also touch on cultural perspectives of self-care and practical tips for integrating it into dai...

Think of this episode as a blend of how you consciously and unconsciously make choices. Zai Miztiq and I were talking one day and this came up.  You get to hear our thoughts and the psychology behind why beautiful women choose ugly men. That means behavior as well as looks. I am bringing levity to mental health awareness whether you are a beautiful woman or ugly man join us 😂🥰🎉 According t...

Summary In this episode, Cordelia Gaffar discusses the often-overlooked challenges that mothers face in balancing work and family life. She highlights the emotional labor involved, the impact on self-worth, and offers practical solutions for reclaiming joy and nurturing oneself amidst the chaos of motherhood. The conversation emphasizes the importance of self-care, breathing techniques, and the ne...

My series on Mothers and Motherhood begins Monday on What People Miss. This week let’s be honest about Mothers and Divorce. Some women don’t want it. Some women do want it. Both groups sometimes stay bondage to the emotions of their decision and the circumstances which created it for years. What if you could not only be free of it but use the emotions as the fuel for liberation? What if you could...

In this heartfelt conversation, Renee Miller and I explore the profound themes of love, accountability, and the beauty of life. We discuss the importance of integral love, which emphasizes responsibility and empathy in our interactions. The conversation delves into the barriers that prevent a loving world, including personal struggles and societal issues. Ultimately, they highlight the power of ch...

In this engaging conversation, Cordelia Gaffar and Renee Miller explore the multifaceted nature of love, relationships, and personal growth. They discuss the importance of shadow work, effective communication in new relationships, and the role of compassion in leadership. The dialogue emphasizes the need for emotional intelligence and the impact of love blockages on personal and professional inter...

In this enlightening conversation, Cordelia Gaffar and Dr. Neema Moore delve into the often-overlooked aspects of menopause, discussing its beauty, the challenges of perimenopause, and the impact of hormonal changes on women's health. They explore the significance of community support, the effects of fibroids, and the positive transformations that can occur during this life stage. The discussion e...

Summary In this conversation, Cordelia Gaffar explores the critical differences between equity and equality, emphasizing the importance of focusing on equity to achieve fairness and justice. She discusses cultural transformation, the need to value all forms of work, the significance of financial inclusion for women, and the empowerment that comes from self-care and joy. Gaffar encourages listeners...

, "Aging has a wonderful beauty, and we should have respect for that." Have you questioned your looks? Felt judged for them? Or even avoided discussing them for fear of (fill in the blank)? Let's talk about what beauty is and is not. self awareness,  self love,  rediscovery and  the importance of recognizing the beauty within us. Introducing Dr. Chi Quita Mack, MSW: distinguished so...

Many intelligent and successful women suffer in silence with an unspoken trauma. Sometimes because they don’t acknowledge it and sometimes because it is not recognized as a REAL form of abuse.  According to https://www.womenslaw.org/👍 Emotional abuse is defined as “...mostly non-physical behaviors that the abuser uses to control, isolate, or frighten you. Often, the abuser uses it to break d...