What Fresh Hell: Parenting, Relationships, and Making Life Better, with Two Funny Moms

In honor of Women's History Month, this "Deep Dive" series highlights some of our past interview episodes about raising daughters. How do we raise our daughters to feel empowered, rather than helpless, in the face of gender bias? ⁠Dr. Jo-Ann Finkelstein⁠, PhD, author of book ⁠SEXISM AND SENSIBILITY⁠, offers parenting tips to prepare our girls for the modern world. Dr. Finkelstein, Amy, and Margare...

What does it really mean to be a Black single mother in America? Why are the stories we hear and tell about that experience so often incomplete? Margaret talks with cultural critic, writer, and editor Jamilah Lemieux, author of Black. Single. Mother: Real-Life Tales of Longing and Belonging. Jamilah discusses the fears she initially had about writing openly about single motherhood—and how the proc...

Are screens ruining our kids' childhoods? Is AI going to rot our brains in the next thirty days? Or are these the latest examples of a very human tendency: the catastrophizing of change? From the dawn of the printing press to the Satanic panic over heavy metal lyrics, we explore the long history of social panics, find familiar patterns, and discuss our findings, including: Why parents are often th...

Based on a recent listener question about letting go as your kids get older and gain more independence, we're highlighting some of our past interview episodes that address this topic. Anxiety is a natural response to stress. Sometimes it’s even useful, like when it alerts us to danger. But when anxiety grips our children, they often don’t (can’t) explain how they’re feeling, and their inner turmoi...

What do we misunderstand about teen mothers? How does stigma contribute to the difficulties teen mothers face? This week we're talking to Susan Sutton about her nonprofit The Ember Project, which supports teen and early mothers through mentorship, financial literacy, education support, and small but powerful financial grants. Susan shares her own story of becoming a mother in 10th grade and how th...

We talk a lot about how to manage kids when they are being impossible. But it's supposed to be the terrible twos, not the terrible forty-somethings. What do we do when we're the one in the family who's dysregulated? In this episode, we discuss: How to know if you're emotionally dysregulated Why parents (especially moms) are particularly vulnerable How dysregulation can show up both as anger and as...

Based on a recent listener question about how to start to let go as our kids get older, this "Deep Dive" series highlights some of our past interview episodes on the topic. As moms, we're often given tons of societal pressure on how we have to give our kids all the right things—then told to "chill out" when it comes to the worrying part. ⁠Gabrielle Blair⁠, author of ⁠THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT⁠, is he...

How do we get kids to *want* to put their phones down? This week we're talking to bestselling author Catherine Price about her latest book, The Amazing Generation: Your Guide to Fun and Freedom in a Screen-Filled World, co-written with social psychologist Jonathan Haidt. Instead of focusing on parental controls and screen-time battles, The Amazing Generation speaks directly to kids, inviting them...

Do siblings really need to get along as children to have healthy relationships as adults? We challenge one of parenting’s most deeply held assumptions: that sibling closeness is the ultimate goal. We explain why sibling rivalry is developmentally normal and how fighting can actually be a sign of connection—not failure. Finally, we talk about what parents can influence—and what they can’t—when it c...

Based on a recent listener question about how to start to let go as our kids get older, this "Deep Dive" series highlights some of our past interview episodes on the topic. Are teenagers destined to be "over" everything? ⁠Jenny Anderson⁠ and ⁠Rebecca Winthrop⁠, authors of ⁠THE DISENGAGED TEEN⁠, explain what's behind what they call the "teen disengagement crisis" and how parents can act. Jenny Ande...

Amy and Margaret talk with Dr. Allison Alford, communication scholar and author of the new book Good Daughtering: The Work You’ve Always Done, the Credit You’ve Never Gotten, and How to Finally Feel Like Enough. Dr. Alford explains the concept of daughtering—the emotional, logistical, and mental labor adult daughters perform to assist their parents and to hold families together. Drawing on more th...

Why are some kids shy? Is there harm in giving a kid's personality that label? In this episode, we explore the differences between shyness, introversion, and behavioral inhibition, and why fear—not preference—is often at the heart of shy behavior. We also discuss when shyness becomes a concern, and when it’s time to seek extra support. Finally, we share practical strategies for helping shy or slow...

Based on a recent listener question about how to start to let go as our kids get older, this "Deep Dive" series highlights some of our past interview episodes on the topic. Julie Lythcott-Haims is the author of the parenting bestseller How to Raise an Adult, which opened the minds of loving but hovering parents everywhere. In this episode, we discuss her follow up book ⁠Your Turn: How To Be An Adu...

Margaret and Amy talk with safety expert and digital creator Dannah Eve, author of the new book STREET SMARTS, about the steps women can take to be safer in our daily lives—and how to teach age-appropriate techniques to our children. Drawing on her background in criminology and her experience as a parent, Dannah shares practical strategies for trusting your instincts, recognizing red flags, and na...

It's time to confront one of life’s most uncomfortable truths: how our moms were often right—especially when we were convinced they were totally wrong. From dead-end relationships to to coat-free winters, Amy and Margaret reflect on the advice they might have once ignored, but now repeat to their own kids. We also discuss our listeners' own versions of mom wisdom: trusting your intuition about fri...

Based on a recent listener question about how to start to let go as our kids get older, this "Deep Dive" series highlights some of our past interview episodes on the topic. There's a mental health crisis among teens. Teens are also highly emotional creatures by design. Adolescent psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour thinks the two are starting to get conflated– and that means parents and educators can som...

We welcome back family counselor Erin Cox to talk about how we talk about the immigration raids and ICE detentions taking place in the United States, the children who are being detained, and the fear all children are absorbing from the news, social media, and their communities. We discuss what’s happening on the ground in places like Minnesota, Texas, and Portland; why it's making so many of us fe...

Still not feeling that new-year excitement? That's because forcing productivity during the darkest months is a losing battle. Would it make you feel better to learn that January and February were once considered such black holes of nothingness that they did not appear on the calendar *at all*? In this episode, we're declaring that February is the new January. We discuss the history of the calendar...

When we imagine peer pressure, we imagine coming to the rescue by slapping drugs and alcohol out of our kids' hands after their friends undoubtedly tell them they should definitely try some. But peer pressure--who feels it, why, and exactly WHAT kids are being pressured to do--is a complex issue. In this episode, Amy and Margaret discuss: The biological imperative adolescents have to take risks in...

Amy talks with developmental psychologists Dr. Kathy Hirsh-Pasek and Dr. Roberta Golinkoff, authors of the newly revised parenting classic EINSTEIN NEVER USED FLASHCARDS, about why today’s parents feel more pressured than ever to optimize every moment of childhood—and why research shows that approach often backfires. From academic preschools to AI toys, screen time to early reading, Kathy and Robe...

Why do some moments feel enormous while others vanish from memory? Why do two people experience the same event and walk away with completely different interpretations? And why do we so often repeat stories about ourselves that keep us stuck? In this episode, we explore narrative identity—the science-backed idea that who we are is shaped not just by what happens to us, but by the story we tell abou...

What do we do as parents when our kids aren't great at making friends, or their friends are outgrowing them, or we feel that their friends are a bad influence? Sometimes, we're not supposed to do anything at all. Sometimes our kids really need our support. How can we tell the difference? In this episode, Amy and Margaret discuss: what might contribute to trouble making friends the skills kids can...

Margaret talks with clinical psychologist Dr. Meredith Elkins, author of the new book PARENTING ANXIETY, about how anxiety really works—and how parents can stop unintentionally reinforcing it in themselves and their kids. Dr. Elkins, a faculty member at Harvard Medical School and director of the McLean Anxiety Mastery Program, shares insights from her new book Parenting Anxiety: Breaking the Cycle...

From socks-and-slides footwear to mysteriously disappearing spoons and phone chargers, teens and tweens can really rack up the infractions. In this episode, Amy and Margaret break down the baffling behaviors that define life with older kids—tween and teen “crimes"—as reported by parents in the What Fresh Hell community. Paradoxical and criminal behavior further includes having “nothing to wear” de...

When we have a kid who just doesn't seem to fit in—or who is a loner, if a fairly content one—it can be hard for parents. But putting our own anxiety about it aside, and getting clear on the lagging skills and social cues that may not quite be in place, is the best way to help kids get on a better path. This episode is full of specific and useful advice! Amy and Margaret discuss: all the reasons k...