Unmasking the Abuser - The Podcast

Abusers are master manipulators, wielding cunning tactics to ensnare their prey -but what makes you a target? In this gripping episode of Unmasking the Abuser , I peel back the curtain on the hidden beliefs and behaviors that leave you vulnerable to predators, no matter how much you know about their schemes. From subtle habits to deeply held convictions, discover the surprising ways you might be u...

Dive into the riveting world of Unmasking the Abuser with our milestone 50th episode! Now in its electrifying 5th season, this podcast, hosted by renowned social psychologist Dr. Dina McMillan, is your ultimate weapon for outsmarting manipulators and abusers. Dr. McMillan masterfully distills complex graduate-level social psychology into a powerful, concise cheat sheet, blending fresh insights wit...

For years, I’ve seen a gap in understanding manipulation, hesitant to address it until now. Compassionate, trusting people are preyed upon — not just by romantic Abusers, but also by some social and political movements. These groups mirror the worst Abusers: demanding blind loyalty, erasing boundaries, and punishing dissent or even questions with brutal ferocity. Some are able to hide in plain sig...

Coercive control has been a hot topic in recent years, with some jurisdictions even making it illegal. Lawmakers recognize the serious risks victims face - even without victims being subjected to frequent bouts of physical violence. But what exactly is coercive control? How does it take hold in a relationship, and why do victims often accept it without realizing the danger? Are they willing partic...

We all like to think we're too smart to fall for the same mistakes twice. But the truth is, some devious manipulation tactics can slip past our defenses again and again -especially if we don't recognize them, if we're distracted, or if we believe our past experiences make us immune. In this eye-opening episode of Unmasking the Abuser , we dive deep into the most effective manipulati...

The holiday season often brings joy, smiles, and shared meals, but for those in toxic relationships, it can also mean stress, conflict, and emotional strain. In this episode of Unmasking the Abuser , we go beyond offering sympathy to provide practical, actionable advice for managing an abusive partner or family member during the festive season. Staying true to the solution-focused approach you’ve...

Ever feel like your decisions were made for you before you even knew it? It’s not magic—it's a set of cunning maneuvers social psychologist Robert Cialdini calls " Pre-Suasion" . In this episode, we dive into the clever, subtle tactics that influence how we make choices long before a pitch is even made. From strategic questions to the power of background music, we examine the hidden...

Ever wonder just how much you care for the people in your life - or how much they truly care for you? Discover a straightforward approach to finding out, no awkward conversations or confrontations required. Join us for an eye-opening episode and strengthen the bonds that matter most.  The Circles of Intimacy is a simple tool that allows you to gauge the strength of your feelings for the people in...

Fear is a powerful tool of manipulation. But equally potent is the art of calming those fears to gain control — a tactic Abusers and Manipulators know all too well. In this episode of Unmasking the Abuser , we’ll expose how abusers exploit the power of reassurance, distraction, and false security to make you ignore genuine threats. From minimizing risks to offering protection, these strategies are...

 In this crucial episode, Dr. Dina McMillan dives into one of the most powerful weapons in a manipulator’s toolkit—fear. Fear is a natural, protective instinct that helps keep us safe. But once manipulators learn what makes your heart race and your stomach drop, they can exploit it to control you.  In this episode, Dr. McMillan explains the different types of fear and the main strategies employed...

In this compelling episode of Unmasking the Abuser , we explore an event that touched everyone’s lives—the Covid pandemic. More than just the fear of the virus itself, we dive into the emotional and social rifts caused by differing responses to mandates and directives. How has the Covid era shaped our world today? Can the wounds it opened be healed? And how prepared are we for the next potential c...

In this episode, we dive into one of the most overlooked but crucial phases of manipulation: Testing and Training . While tactics like Love Bombing and Gaslighting grab headlines, these initial maneuvers — Testing and Training — lay the groundwork for all the other manipulative strategies. Without successfully testing new targets and then training them to comply, Abusers and Manipulators wouldn&ap...

In this vital episode, we wrap up the eBook,  Brief Overview of Abusers' Strategies and Tactics , covering Chapter 7: "Tactics of Abusers," Chapter 8: "Honorable Mention Tactics," and the concluding section. Just like the eBook itself—available for only $10 at www.drdinamcmillan.com —this episode gives you the essential tools to recognize and counter abusers' most ins...

In this crucial episode, we delve further into the explosive insights unveiled in my latest eBook, " Brief Overview of Abusers' Strategies and Tactics ." We explore chapters four through six, uncovering not just the selection process —how Abusers pinpoint their romantic victims based on specific traits — but also the deceptions, strategies, and facades they employ to conceal their t...

I put a lot of thought into creating my eBook, Brief Overview of Abusers' Strategies and Tactics . I'm excited to dive into its key insights in this episode and the next. Research shows that the more often you engage with information across different formats, the better you retain it — especially when you pair it with a visual reference. This is exactly why I’m breaking down the eBook he...

This is another key episode with a slightly different twist. Most of the time we discuss ways to recognize efforts to take advantage of you, using slick words and clever moves to influence, persuade and exploit. This time we stand back and discuss three core factors that can improve your shield against these devious efforts. These simple moves can make it less likely any tactics of persuasion will...

Some of the most crucial information about abusive relationships is how they start. What are they like at the very beginning? Most victims and survivors don't recognize the manipulation that happened at the start. That's why this can be a key to preventing new victims in the future. This episode provides a general overview of the manipulative moves and maneuvers that are used most often...

Important Valentine's Day Episode - no roses required. Most of our episodes are about choosing a better romantic partner. This episode is all about YOU, whether you're female or male, in a relationship or single. It guides you as you identify any beliefs or behaviors that are holding you back, causing you or your partner pain.  It helps expose the mistakes you repeat - no matter how much...

This is one of the most important Episodes we've done. Inspired by a request from a podcast audience member, this Episode explores the tricks and maneuvers used to entice a mistreated partner to return to an abusive relationship. How is it done? What does it take for someone who's fed up and perhaps deeply afraid to dive back into a highly volatile and even dangerous situation? What stri...

This short podcast needs to be bookmarked and saved somewhere convenient. It contains key tips for emotional survival during the holiday season - or any time your family gets together. If you have a volatile partner, a difficult relative, a troublesome partner of a relative, don't go into their lair without protecting yourself. That's what this Episode is all about. All always, the cruci...

This is still the only podcast series that exposes the specific tactics used by Abusers to lure in and trap romantic partners. It offers rare insight into manipulation that's relevant everywhere in your life, not only in romance. But have you ever wondered if we've missed something - another risk factor that could be significant? In this explosive episode, we discuss a crucial danger tha...

I'm always learning. This episode is an incredible shared experience with A. Garcia, a woman who's experienced severe abuse and violence.  She decided to use what happened to her as a platform to help others.  The interview was via Zoom, not in a studio, but I promise you'll get so caught up you won't mind. Please listen as A. discusses what she endured, and how she is a big pr...

In the last Episode we looked at the efforts made to help Abusers to change. Batterers' Intervention Expert Kevin Tarrance from the Department of Children and Families in Florida shared his insights. He offered the various stages he believes Abusers have to traverse in order to fundamentally alter their expectations and behaviors in their intimate relationships.  In this Episode we look at ch...

This is an exciting episode, and not only because I had to quickly learn how to use a virtual interview on Zoom as a podcast episode.   Whether or not Abusers can change is the #1 question I'm asked by those who've been involved with these individuals. Yes and no.  That's the answer and why it takes two episodes to discuss it. I interviewed my first guest, Kevin (Michael) Tarrance,...

This is a must-listen Episode. I discuss why my book, But He Says He Loves Me, is still essential knowledge for anyone wanting to quickly and clearly spot the signs of an abusive relationship.  I've just finished production for the audio version of the book - out soon - and offer some exciting previews for my listeners. The book, But He Says He Loves Me, was written in two voices: myself as a...