Unfilmable

The maniacs decided to make a slasher series where there isn't a killer. And at least for this entry, it works. Wendy is a precog who gets a vision of herself and her friends dying horribly on a rollercoaster. She stops her friends from riding, and death gets angry. And when death gets angry, he makes ample use of one small town's horrendous safety standards to off those kids... horrendously.

Hey there! How's it going, old friend? Know it's been a while since we've been in touch and I was wondering if you had gotten a chance to put the lotion on the skin?

...but this episode of Unfilmable is!

But one question remains, who is the titular Creep? Mark Duplass. It's Mark Duplass. The character he plays. That's the creep.

John and Levi are two Los Angeles fuckups who are held together by the fact that they witnessed a supernatural phenomenon... and they want to monetize it. What follows is a claustrophobic and dense sequence of rabbit holes and abuses, resulting in terrible tragedy. But how much of it's real? Something in the Dirt is Justin Benson and Aaron Moorhead at their best, refining their form of funny, huma...

We just missed Christmas with this episode, but that's okay, because Silent Night Deadly Night 5: The Toy Maker, has nothing to do with Christmas. Derek Quinn is a young boy traumatized by the recent death of his father, and his mother doesn't know how to help him. Simultaneously, a strange man is stalking them, and killer toys keep showing up... all seemingly related to a toy shop owner named Joe...

How does an RBMK nuclear reactor blow up? We spend this extra-long episode of Unfilmable trying to find out, as we watch HBO's Chernobyl miniseries. While not categorized as a work of horror, it's impossible to not be terrified by what is shown. And the way the real-life events are fictionalized here and turned into a narrative pulls not only from horror film, but goes all the way back to Lovecraf...

Things aren't going quite right for Jacob Singer. He's having flashbacks to the Vienam War and seeing demons all around him. Reality seems to be breaking down as he hops around in time. There's a truth he needs to face, and it might just take an angelic chiropractor to help him see it. Jacob's Ladder is one of the most influential horror films of all time, establishing psychological horror tropes...

No one in the world needs to be told that the Texas Chainsaw Massacre is an important movie, but sometimes you need to be reminded that it's a good movie. A van full of teens is on a roadtrip into the vast empty stretches of Texas, and they find themselves wrapped up in the murderous affairs of a family of cannibals... and their mute hatchetman Leatherface. And you'll never guess what weapon he us...

We're stretching definitions here a bit, but it's for a purpose. "American Movie" is a documentary about the amateur production of a short horror film called "Coven". It tells the story of its long and troubled process, all centered around its inept but persuasive director Mark Borchardt. We've talked about indie horror movies here, but American Movie documents one of the last times when a product...

Weddings are stressful enough without your spouse's terrible family immediately trying to kill you. That's the situation that Grace finds herself in when she marries into the obscenely rich Le Domas family, who made their fortune in publishing board games. Whenever someone marries in, the family has a ritual where they draw a card and play whatever game is on it. Unfortunately for Grace, she winds...

You can steer clear of a lot of problems by staying above ground. In fact, there are few reasons to go down there. Few reasons worth dealing with the CHUDS for, anyway. Someone should have told that to these thrill-seeking ladies, looking to do some spelunking after their friend suffers a tragic loss. The Descent is one of the scariest movies out there, even before the monsters show up. But the mo...

Who's ready for some trash? There's a television that summons zombies. Wait, not exactly zombies. The Video Dead, who have their own rules f Who's ready for some trash? There's a television that summons zombies. Wait, not exactly zombies. The Video Dead, who have their own rules for some reason. There's a horny boy named Jeff who's trying his best to get everyone killed, a Texan Van Helsing, and l...

The Wicker Man is a classic of folk horror, a foundational story about a man whose traditional ways and authority have no sway in a dangerous and unfamiliar environment. He's tracking down a missing girl, Rowan Morrison, on Summerisle, a Scottish island controlled by a pagan cult. This is a very weird movie, with a centerpiece performance by Christopher Lee as the main villain. It's brightly lit,...

1, 2, Freddy's coming for you. 3, 4, the gates are open. This slasher classic bucked the trend of wordless, stoic villains in favor of a killer with a distinct personality who was obviously having fun. The teens of Elm Street don't know what's coming for them, as Freddy Krueger invades their dreams, attacking, killing, and sexually menacing them. That is until one girl gets the idea to fight back....

Invasion of the Body Snatchers is a paranoid classic, and also a profoundly strange movie. The pod people are taking over, and the only people who can stop them are... health inspectors? Just kidding, no one can stop them! Because the fatalism inherent to this version of the movie is a huge part of the appeal. Alongside its all-star cast, of course.

The Cabin in the Woods is a pretty important movie, and it's hard to talk about why without spoiling the best part. So this description will need to hem and haw around it. Some teens are headed to a remote cabin for a party weekend, but they don't know that they're walking right into an elaborate scenario coordinated by a shady organization. While the dialogue has a little bit of that Joss Whedon...

We finish covering John Carpenter's "Apocalypse Trilogy" by looking at the 1987 horror film Prince of Darkness . The Catholic church has been hiding a terrible secret for millennia: the devil is real, he's trapped in a tube, and he's ready to break free. And it's up to a group of horny and creepy college students to learn his true nature and try to stop him. While this is our least favorite of the...

We have such sights to describe to you. Kirsty barely survived her brush with the Cenobites and the machinations of her stepmother and uncle. Now she's in a mental institution run by a psychopath, and there's not enough skin to go around. This movie makes no sense, but its over the top effects and visual ambition push it over the finish line to make it one of the better horror movie sequels out th...

There's something wrong with the Graham family, and we really recommend watching the movie first to learn what that something is before you listen to this recap of the film. Hereditary is one of the scariest movies we've seen, and talking through this family drama that takes several wild turns before going completely nuts has only caused us to appreciate it more. This movie gets an unreserved reco...

This debut film by Robert Eggers, an Unfilmable alum for his sophomore movie The Lighthouse, is a chilling period piece about the horrors of old time religion and the casual violence that can be done within a family. We disagree over whether or not it matters if the supernatural stuff is real, but we absolutely agree that this is an effective horror movie that you must watch.

Steve is a paramedic who just got a brain cancer diagnosis, and his best friend's daughter just went missing. This sets Steve to investigating a designer drug that, accidentally, has "time travel" as its side effect. This is our least favorite Moorhead and Benson film, primarily because of its thematic sloppiness. There's still plenty to recommend it, like the visual effects and Anthony Mackie's p...

This month we have a movie that could have been entirely avoided if couples knew when to break up. Dani is suffering from traumatic grief, Christian is her insensitive boyfriend, and they're both taking a trip with some college friends to a remote Swedish community that has some secrets. Dark secrets, of course.

Evan looks for a change of scenery, and finds a woman who is more complicated than he was bargaining for. This second episode by the directing duo of Justin Benson and Aaron Moorhead does the seemingly impossible and mixes romance with Lovecraftian horror, and if I said any more here it would ruin the many surprises that are in store for you.

Four recently-bereaved friends take a hike in the Swedish woods, and find themselves ensnared in an ancient monster's trap. While it's pretty standard folk horror, this movie brings us good performances and extremely evocative imagery, making it one that we'd recommend you check out.