Uncomfortable Friend

Send a text My husband Kevin has left for a work trip to India. The last time either of us were apart internationally, our son Lincoln died. In this episode, I talk about the leading indicators that let me know I was numbing the pain I expected to feel, and the process I've grown to use when doing the hard work of incorporating and moving forward from a trigger. Borrowed from a beloved Disney...

Send a text I had the honor of speaking with my friend Katie about the love and loss of her sweet husband, Charles. She graciously shares some of her amazing adventures with Charles, how grief has changed over the last few years, challenges, comforts, and how she seeks meaning. She is such a light. I hope you enjoy our discussion. Resources: If you find yourself at Arlington National Cemetery, pay...

Send a text Before and after our recorded conversation, Katie shared with me so many cards that she and Charles wrote to one another while they were apart. It was truly a gift to witness the love these two have. They were each other's person. I hope that as you listen, it gives you strength to ask a bereaved friend or family member about their person. Sure there are some tears, but I think yo...

Send a text I continue my interview with my husband Kevin covering the topics of grieving at work, the many kinds of grief and the challenge of relating, humanizing aspects of grief, and the future. If any part of this episode has touched you, you have a question/idea for an episode, or if you'd like to send Lincoln a note, please email: lincoln.m.mccormick@gmail.com. Until we meet again <...

Send a text In today's episode, I have the first half of an interview I did with my husband, Kevin. We sat down and discussed how becoming parents has changed our relationship, how we've grieved in similar/different ways, leveraging our relationship as a tool while suffering, and some things he does differently after loss.  Resources: Swallowed by a Snake Provide me feedback via a quick...

Send a text EVERYONE struggles to make decisions. Are we doing the right thing? What happens if we make the wrong choice? Today, I wrap up my mini-series about managing and take more time to dive into the Love-Fear decision making model that I've been using since Lincoln's passing. I hope it helps empower you to align your decisions with what means the most to you. Resources: Jyoti Patel...

Send a text I used to be very direct with feedback when speaking about what's going well and what needs to be fixed, however, that doesn't always present in a loving way. What would it look like if you helped someone grow even when giving constructive or "consider" items to develop toward? Lincoln showed me that EVERYONE is valuable and how can we encourage and support these sk...

Send a text Almost every person I've been talking to has been dealing with some amount of burnout. As a people manager, over the last few years, I've seen it countless times at work AND I've experienced it myself. Today I talk about similarities between grief and burnout, how others have shown up for me when I'm feeling this way (thank you Lincoln for giving me the courage to b...

Send a text I continue my interview mini-series with my Aunt Kathy who we affectionately call Kiki. She's been the matriarch of our family as long as I can remember, and I discuss what grief has been like for her growing up, what it was like when she heard the news of Lincoln, what's changed since then, and the importance of family and what family means to her. I feel so blessed to have...

Send a text My best friend, Christina, has shown up for me in such a supportive way my entire life, but especially through the loss of my son. Today we discuss how she's supported me, how Lincoln impacted her life, and the special meaning and impact our children have on our lives. If any part of this episode has touched you, you have a question/idea for an episode, or if you'd like to se...

Send a text ***Waring: This episode may be difficult for folks who are especially sensitive to death**** In today's episode, I interview my sister Jordyn. She's a pediatric oncology nurse and we talk about her experience of the loss of my son Lincoln, grief in healthcare, and what she's learned about death. She also shared some resources that she recommends families to review if the...

Send a text Someone recently asked me what I would have done if I didn't have faith... the answer is, I don't know... but I also don't know if I have faith the way they meant it. Today I discuss growing up as an "Easter Sunday" Catholic, how it's changed over time, especially after loss, and the focus it provides me now. I don't impose my faith or thoughts on any...

Send a text Our closest relationships are tested after experiencing complex grief. Today, I get very candid about my marriage after the loss of our 15 month old son. While there has been great joy in welcoming our two additional children to the family, we've also experienced a lot of darkness. I talk about these experiences and feelings, and the choices we've had to make which has allowe...

Send a text I'm intimately familiar with how grief has shown up and changed over the last four years, but it's only recently where I can recognize how grief has been showing up for my husband. In this free form episode, I discuss how we've grieved, the challenges of grieving differently, the necessity of resources to find support, and more. Resources: If Anything Happens I Love You...

Send a text Suffering is pain, or at the very least, uncomfortable. It's part of the human condition and something that can have amazing power to transform. In this episode I discuss what suffering is, what I think causes it, how I'm trying to embrace it, how to help regulate myself when I'm suffering, and the meaning it provides.  Resources: Coach Michel Spruance From Contempt to C...

Send a text I stopped believing in resolutions when my son died. What was the point? What good did they do? Instead, I try to work on some perspective... a new challenge... that can continue my path of healing. In today's episode, I share my "mantras" over the last 4 years since Lincoln died, and what my focus will be for 2023. If any part of this episode has touched you, or if you&...

Send a text I am surprised how much grief has affected my memory, and especially my ability to relive the most special moments I had with Lincoln. Today I share a few memories invoked from pictures, how some dreams I've had feel like extra memories, and how sharing memories of a loved one with a grieving person can have a meaningful impact. Resources: Locket Photos by Bryan Clark No Matter Wh...

Send a text In the Northern Hemisphere, the Winter Solstice (December 21st) is recognized in many Western Christian denominations as "The Longest Night". Typically, services are held to hold space for those who have lost a loved one and are experiencing grief. Today's episode is dedicated to how I've experienced various holidays as a bereaved mother over the last 4.5 years, wha...

Send a text How do you make sense of a world where your child could die? Why do we face so many challenges and so much suffering? In this episode I attempt to put together different puzzle pieces of what I think this life is meant to be. It's definitely not as polished as other topics I've covered, but I hope it helps you feel more comfortable in your search and struggles, and gives you...

Send a text Have you seen unconditional love? Do you remember how you felt the first time you recognized it? Lincoln grew my heart in ways I didn't know could exist, and today I'm sharing some of the insights of what I've discovered unconditional love looks like for your kiddos, yourself, and your partner. Thanks for listening! Resources: The Four Laws of Love - Jimmy Evans If any p...

Send a text Have you ever experienced the awkwardness of sitting in a room where no one is willing to discuss the major issue because it's uncomfortable? Well with grief, my son Lincoln is always that topic, and as many parents know, once you've had a child it's a major relationship you love to share. Today I talk about what it feels like to be in that situation, some ways I've...

Send a text We all form a set of rules to live by, or paradigm, that we build in pieces over time based on interactions with our families, care givers, friends, and community. What happens when you reach rock bottom and your paradigm shatters? In this episode, I explore the loss of my paradigm, strategies I tried to employ, and five things I've learned to be true as I re-build my world view....

Send a text When someone you love dies, it's so very easy to get overwhelmed with thoughts of "What if?" Today I talk about some what ifs I experience from my loss, how I process them, and "escape hatches" I use to pull me out when what if doesn't serve me anymore.  Additional resources I've shared in this podcast: www.grief2growth.com by Brian Smith www.sepsis.o...

Send a text Talking to someone about feeling angry is such a vulnerable thing to do, and when you're met with statements like "at least they aren't suffering" or "they wouldn't want you to be sad" it can be enough to make you want to scream. In this episode I talk about some aspects of grief that have made me really angry and then I share some ways I've work...

Send a text Have you ever looked into someone's eyes to see a perfect version of who you are, who you didn't even know you could be, staring back at you? That was Lincoln, my beautiful son who passed away in June 2018. Today I share my story, different aspects of grief and loss, and my goal for future episodes to follow. If any part of this podcast has been helpful to you, or if you have...