Two Dads Talking

Super Update Time! Cliff Notes: 1. Suicide pod makers won't tolerate failure. 2. A micropenis is a real thing and not just an insult. 3. You know that haunting feeling that you just wish would be against your mortgage provider instead? Tom does! 4. We Are Groot.   Final call for Beardy and the Unbeardys from mythical Australia. The reward is still only one month free to the 2DT Patreon  - come on,...

Between jobs, moving, and our beautiful children who (luckily) take after our wives, we have been crazy busy recently. To make up for our tardiness, here is one of our recent Patreon entries...our first joint ODDD where we are really hoping Frank is okay: Texas Chili Contest.   Find this and other exclusive content on the 2DT Patreon !     Find all the episodes and more on our website ! Oh Merch y...

We are looking for the one we call "Beardy," who uttered the whimsical title to this week's episode. When Tom is in Las Vegas, he is great at making friends, not so great and remembering names, and ends his time with mischief managed. Here comes conspiracy theories, Bluey, Las Vegas, and a dash of parenting, and an APB for Beardy and the Blokes!   Wanted: Beardy and/or his blokes. Reward: One mont...

Tonight, we present to you our (podcasting) mid-life crisis, where we provide a multi-course meal of "daddy issues!" On the menu this evening: vulnerability, lost and adrift in the parenting sea, nature vs. nurture, the most basic responsibility to our kids as a dad, and finally, is being good enough....good...enough?   Any one of these fine dishes goes great with a glass of 2DT Patreon ! Highly r...

Welcome, all you sassy frasses! On this episode we welcome our Week 11 Patreon member Charles, who like a modern Virgil guides us through our own little dad inferno. Here's a hint: what do Caitlin Clark, Linkin Park, and lying to your kids all have in common? Answer: Probably nothing, other than Charles is expert-level on all of them.   Patreon is live with member-only content! Find it here: 2DT P...

Do you think you should be able to name your kids anything? Like, ANYTHING? We respectively give our very non-legal-advice opinions on the matter, and somehow eventually find our way to single guy hacks, fish tank follies, and realizing that those Chinese zoos are always up to something. Also, send us a shoutout for a Dad out there who deserves a little acknowledgment!   Patreon is live with membe...

We went mental this week. Have you seen The Matrix? Of course you have. Now imagine we could build something similar and actually download years’ worth of rehabilitative experiences (AKA Prison Time) into a convicted criminal’s mind in minutes. Sound far-fetched? You might be surprised. We took a look at the technology being developed by Cognify right now, as well as the recent successes of Neural...

Welcome to our first remix, where we bring on special guests to help us revisit previous episodes. Tonight, we resurrect our spiciest episode yet with What is a Woman: Answered. We are joined by none other than Big Lux, who very graciously took time out from being famous to join us leading up to the Next Up Music Festival. See you there!   Patreon is live with member-only content! Find it here: 2D...

Welp, we went straight from Hawk Tuah to a Turkish Sharpshooter. We're talking Olympics tonight, and more specifically, Tom is quizzing Doug to see if he knows...well, anything. You name it, we got it: from the opening ceremony to the Turkish John Wick, to awkward sports commentators, boxing controversies and disqualifying weenies. After you're done here, go watch yourself some Kayak Cross (you're...

What do you want your Legacy to be? No, not the Subaru, though it's a pretty sweet ride. Anyway, after we talk about silly things like how you want others to remember you, we get into the good stuff: SUPERPOWERS. Not just which ones are the best, but which ones actually count (Domino, looking at you).   Patreon is live with member-only content! Find it here: 2DT Patreon !   Super Links for our Sup...

A major political candidate and former President was nearly picked off...that's kind of a big deal. We dive right into everything we know (and don't) from the outset, and hopefully can leave you with a slightly different holistic view you won't get anywhere else. The one thing you absolutely must remember? A father made the ultimate sacrifice to protect his family - RIP Corey Comperatore.   Patreo...

Hello all you lovely Father Figures! Tonight we plan on going down in a Blaise of Glory - Blaise Pascal and Pascal's Wager, that is. Tonight you will learn how to analogize poker odds with religious beliefs, Robin Hood can tell you exactly how you view reality, and that atheism is so confusing to Doug. Also, please let us know who your favorite Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle is because we are totally...

Terrence Howard is an incredible actor, and I think we can all agree he would've been a good War Machine if they could have worked out that contract. But did you know he remembers being six months old (in the womb) and recalls inner dialog from before he was born? Did you know he solved a mystery by age six that Leonardo DaVinci allegedly spent his entire life trying to understand? Did you know he...

By law, a taco is now a sandwich...at least in Allen County, Indiana. More importantly, it sounds like the judge does not honor the Cube Rule. Join us for a raucous episode of sandwich fighting, music videos, Lurking 101, and the return of The Big Game. We also find time at the end to go through all the great movies Doug has NOT seen.    Patreon is live with member-only content! Find it here: 2DT...

Is this a great philosophical question critiquing the dangers of the world posed to women by men, or is it just a slap in the face for 50% of the world? Spoiler: we thought it was a bit of both.  What the better question would be, the problem with Christopher Robbin, and a Dad who punched his daughter's 13YO boyfriend. Also, meet the most terrifying bird in the world (thanks Doug).    Patreon is l...

Bet you never thought kids' sleepovers could be explained using poker. Anyway, that's not even the interesting part of this episode. More interesting is hate mail from another episode, Edgar Allan Poe maybe falling victim to poll hustling, Michael Jordan schooling rookies, and our nostalgia over lost experiences. Don't ask what is in our trunks.   Show Links: Poor Edgar Allan Poe. Maybe. Again, Ma...

Don't look now, but we recorded an episode with structure! Don't get used to it. This week we're putting everyone in Arenas (you’ll see what we did there): Caitlin Clark vs. Everybody, Bluey vs. Industry Greed, Dane Cook vs. Dave Chappelle, and our top three (seven) TV Dads of all time. Also, if anyone knows a therapist specializing in people who know too much about NBA shoe deals, please help Tom...

We're stepping away from the subjects that make Tom swear and diving into Chess. We've got theoretical Chess time loops, hippos, Doug starring in a Sarah McLachlan video, and of course, Dad Jokes.   Show Links: How to Beat Kasparov Hippopotamus Defence   Check out our 2DT Patreon page! Additional content, your requests, shout outs, community chats, and so much more! Hoping we can all reach Week El...

That's right - we are so distraught over our presidential candidates that we hardly acknowledged our galactic friends. While we talk (and mostly cry) about our voting choices nowadays, we still make time to comparative morality and protesting, how to tell if your new friend is FBI, and how much Vanilla Coke sucks. Let's Talk Trump vs Biden!   Show Links: Tom's Favorite Trump Quote Is Here The Trut...

We are joined by one of Tom's old colleagues who whisks Tom down Nostalgia Lane. Next, how would you feel if you lost your arm because you...watched a football game? We finish off the evening by swapping drunk (other) driver stories, kid's spring break, and Daylight Savings Time?   Show Links: Chiefs Tickets Nowadays Cost an Arm and a Leg Meme-Accessible Form of Our Other Discussion Also, the Roma...

The Alabama Supreme Court causes these two dads to debate for almost two hours, complete with devils' advocates, the Founding Fathers, and THE BEST bad analogies. Dive into our discussion of IVF and how we feel about a state court inserting itself into the procreative arena. Oh, and also we have another round of good movies for you to watch.   Show Links: Alabama IVF Ruling Mayo Clinic - IVF   Che...

Yup, we went there and actually answered the question. Plus, Tom is a hardcore conservative? Our wives are awesome, and Doug is a sociopath, confirmed by a third party burger eater.   Show Links: The Issue that Sparked our Discussion I Think This Is the Two Gentlemen Tom Was Referencing? No Joke, It's Amazing   Check out our 2DT Patreon page! Additional content, your requests, shout outs, communit...

Bad driving, prop bets, Super Bowl predictions, bad AI robot replacements, and favorite post-apocalyptic movies. See how right (or wrong) we were, complete with new show structuring!   Show Links (so many awesome movie summaries for you!): The Useless Web Gambling Problem? 12 Monkeys The Postman Zombieland I Am Legend The Rover The Book of Eli Snowpiercer (Tom's Favorite)   Check out our 2DT Patre...

Did you know the star of a current children's show got his start by literally defecating on a friend on camera? True story, and we're dumping all the details. We also cover the roles men can, will, or should take with children not their own. Also, what will our AI robot overlords actually do? Doug says flip burgers while Tom thinks cooler things. Finally, books and movie recommendations (sort of),...

Whoo boy did we go places this time. Like, we were probably this close to creating the podcasting singularity. Take a lovely little stroll with us as we discuss suicide pods and how that tech could be used for much better things, personal liberty, The Social Contract by Jean-Jacques Rousseau, banana truck jokes, and Tom's dark stoner poker acquaintance. Don't worry, we also tossed in a Dad Fail or...