Trust on Purpose

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you Ila and Charles discuss how we hold others to standards and expectations, sometimes unfairly or without ever speaking them out loud, and the assumptions we make about others when they don’t behave as we believe they should. We want to thank the team that continues to support us in producing, editing and sharing our work. Jonah Smith for the heartf...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you Ila and Charles discuss the unique differences and complexities in creating high trust in a team setting rather than one-on-one, including the most common missing piece - it might not be what you think. We want to thank the team that continues to support us in producing, editing and sharing our work. Jonah Smith for the heartfelt intro music you h...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you We make and receive requests every day. Sometimes we are delighted with the result, and other times we are frustrated that things didn't turn out as we had imagined. Ila and Charles delve into two real-life situations about how requests that lack clarity and completeness lead to frustration and damaged trust and what we can do to be more effe...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you In this 21st episode of Trust on Purpose, we reflect on our first 20 episodes, revisit our original purpose for recording this podcast series, and share with one another how we are experiencing trust in our own relationships. We want to thank the team that continues to support us in producing, editing and sharing our work. Jonah Smith for the hear...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you Being in roles that require us to be multiple things to multiple people - like disciplinarian and coach for those in Human Resources - can be challenging. HR folks have to constantly balance the interests of both the company and the employees within it, which aren’t always aligned. In fact, they are often in opposition. Pile on top of that, impres...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you Do you find it hard to say no? Are you compelled to say yes to every request, even when you know you can’t come through, or that it will take you even deeper underwater than you already are? Ila and Charles get real about the stories we tell ourselves about what saying no means, and how to do it gracefully and in a way that maintains, or even buil...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you Everyone has been part of a recruitment process (or many) in their lives; many of us have been on both sides of the table. How candidates are treated through the process has an impact on both them and the hiring organization. Ila and Charles discuss the importance of and the how-to of building a recruitment process that builds trust from the begin...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you This episode delves into how a person's environment - their upbringing, community, family, country - shapes how they view people who are different from themselves, and how the assessments we make of "others'" morality and behavior can cause silos and further divisiveness.  We want to thank the team that continues to support us...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you Forgiveness can be hard. Forgiveness of someone else who has hurt us and forgiveness of ourselves for having hurt someone. Even a sincere apology doesn’t magically wipe away the feelings associated with hurt or betrayal. What we do with those feelings, as they inevitably show up long after the actual experience, is where we do have control and cho...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you When our behaviours cause harm or pain to someone, it calls into question our self-image and damages our own self-trust. Acknowledging and apologizing to someone whose trust we have breached or betrayed can be one of the most difficult things we'll ever do, but if salvaging the relationship (and our self-image) is important, avoiding a sincer...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you How we feel about being good or not good at something can define how we see ourselves. Many of us are raised to believe that the only way to get approval and love is to become masterful at something, or sometimes everything. But what happens when we tie our self-worth to that? Ila and Charles share their own experiences and talk about how we all h...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you Self-trust is at the heart of another episode of Trust on Purpose. This time, Ila and Charles examine how being dishonest with ourselves affects our core vision and purpose, and how critical it is to align our intentions with who we want to be, every day. We want to thank the team that continues to support us in producing, editing and sharing our...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you Charles and Ila dig into what happens when we avoid, put off, and ultimately fail to meet the commitments we make to ourselves. The impact it has on our self-trust is real and the work to rebuild it takes courage. We want to thank the team that continues to support us in producing, editing and sharing our work. Jonah Smith for the heartfelt intro...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you In this episode, Ila and Charles deconstruct a story shared by a listener who received less than glowing feedback and how he struggled to listen to it. We want to thank the team that continues to support us in producing, editing and sharing our work. Jonah Smith for the heartfelt intro music you hear at the beginning of each podcast. We LOVE it. H...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you In this episode, Charles and Ila talk about what trusting yourself means, the importance of self-care and compassion, and the power of balancing the interests of others with our own self-interests. We want to thank the team that continues to support us in producing, editing and sharing our work. Jonah Smith for the heartfelt intro music you hear a...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you In this episode, Charles and Ila dive deep into a scenario brought to them by a listener - where she loves her job, but she hates going to work because of deteriorating trust between her and her manager. They get specific about how to prepare for a conversation about rebuilding trust, with specific recommendations of what to think about, what to s...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you In this episode, Charles and Ila talk about the assumptions we make when someone doesn't come through for us like we think they should, and how that impacts trust in the relationship. They also recognize the flip side - we're all human; we mess up; we miss deadlines; we don't meet promises we made. Most people don't mess up int...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you In this episode, Ila and Charles offer a thought-provoking definition of trust that suggests we have both choice and risk in how and who we trust. They discuss the risks and benefits of our trust choices, and how those choices show up in our relationships, at work and at home. We want to thank the team that continues to support us in producing, ed...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you In this episode, Charles and Ila address one of the most frequent questions they get: "How do I repair trust after it has been broken?" When someone has broken our trust, it’s natural to build defences to protect ourselves, to pull away, disconnect or withdraw. Carrying broken trust can be heavy. There is almost always a high cost for li...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you In this episode we address the biggest breakdowns we see in organizations - lack of accountability leading to missed deadlines, unmet expectations, and unfulfilled deliverables. In a world of fast and faster, how we manage our promises requires intention, commitment, and clarity about what we’re asking for and saying yes to. You’ll come away knowi...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you In this episode, we discuss how hard both giving and receiving feedback is for most people and why. We visit the old adages of shit sandwiches that teach people to brace for impact when someone utters the words "I'd like to give you some feedback," and the belief that no news is good news... and how that leads to unintended negative...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you Choosing to trust is choosing to make something you value vulnerable to another person’s actions. We're guessing that you've never thought about it from that perspective.  It's easy to understand why it feels so uncomfortable to be in a distrusting relationship - what you value isn't safe in that person's hands - and why s...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you Ila and Charles share their personal relationships with trust in this episode. They open up, sharing personal histories and the impact that trust has had in their lives. Spoiler alert: it's not always pretty. Secrets and broken trust can create lifetimes of distrust. And trusting blindly, without question, can haunt us in ways we'll stru...

Send us a message - we'd love to hear from you In this episode, we talk about missing conversations - the ones you know you should have, but don't. We've all avoided conversations or tip-toed around them, never really saying what we want to say, to avoid discomfort or for fear of damaging a relationship. Or have you sent emails to your whole team when you really wanted to send a mess...