TransPanTastic: Transgender parenting, work, marriage, transition, and life!

Jess thinks in words, George thinks in pictures. That sometimes makes it difficult to communicate when the words are needed to share the pictures and ideas in his head. As George's body continues to change, and his place in our world continues to settle into the "man camp", he considers how and when to best express the unique viewpoint that his experiences with HRT, with the changes testosterone h...

Parenting is hard. There's no tutorial level, and difficulty settings are subject to change at random. One minute your kid is your trusty sidekick with tons of charisma points, and the next they're on a boss-fight level tantrum. One of ours is particularly difficult, by no fault of his own, and so we have started to hunt down a strategy guide or walkthrough.  We are here to share our entire inters...

Jess and George are fairly rational people. We prefer to use our brains whenever possible, but we are sharing our lives with other people who have clear limits to their sense of reason. Whether it's George's mom, entitled-genius Child#3, developmentally-delayed Child#2, or autistic-teenager Child#1, we often have to be the logical ones on behalf of those in our care.  We are here to share our enti...

George's body has changed a lot over two years on testosterone. In this "extra" episode, we detailed some specific measurements and how T has affected them. We pulled this content from the main " second man-iversary " episode because it only interests a segment of our listeners, so we didn't want to bore the majority of you, but we wanted to have this information available for those who find it in...

At George's second anniversary of HRT, we review how the past two years have gone, his medical transition process, and how he feels about the experience.  An " extra " episode will also be released today, with details of how George's measurements and body shape have changed in two years, for those who want those details.  We are here to share our entire intersectional experience with anyone who fi...

Continuing last week's discussion of Christianity and the LGBTQIA+ community, we talk about how our friends' lives changed as they moved in and out of religious employment, government employment, and the private sector. They could see the effect of their religious views and their love for the queer community in the way they fit (or didn't) into each step of their respective and collective journeys...

George's friend and his wife, the ones who lead the bible study we've mentioned, join us for another guest episode! We discuss their initial experiences at the intersection of religion and respect for the LGBTQIA+ community, and how they moved from a place of supporting "ex-gay" ministries to being genuinely supportive and loving toward the queer community.  To be continued next week!  We are here...

Transition literally means a change from one thing to another. Prior to transition, we were perceived as our assigned gender, and until we begin transitioning we have to cope with a less-than-ideal circumstance and state of being. How we cope is unique to each individual, and how long we choose to adapt to our assigned gender is also variable. George's experience of adapting and his methods of ada...

When Child#2's special needs require a school meeting, it's naturally a little stressful. When we find out that Child Protection has gotten involved with him, it's a lot stressful. When we're a queer family facing these things, with relatively little experience so far with bigotry or discrimination, things might not be what they seem.  We are here to share our entire intersectional experience with...

During transition, the way others see us changes. This often changes the way they interact with us, although not in ways we would have expected. Sometimes the changes aren't even things others realize they're doing, but we who have seen the interactions from both presentations can spot the differences.  We are here to share our entire intersectional experience with anyone who finds it beneficial,...

"Seriously, there's an outrageous amount of running involved." George has had a really sh*tty day. Literally. Thankfully, between having the right hormones and the benefit of being culturally expected to behave as he is naturally inclined to do, he is able to manage things fairly well.  We are here to share our entire intersectional experience with anyone who finds it beneficial, but we want to kn...

Genitals are a touchy subject in most of western culture, and no less so for most of the transgender community. We follow up previous discussions of George's "junk", and jump into Jess' "junk" also. Figuratively, of course. Frank discussion of lower dysphoria, sex, and genderqueer identity follow as we let the conversation follow our thoughts.  We are here to share our entire intersectional experi...

We love hearing from you, our listener friends. We do our best to respond to questions and feedback as quickly as possible, and while that may take us a few days sometimes, we are always glad to see what you think and to satisfy your curiosity. After we respond personally, we sometimes realize that your question is one that may be shared by other listeners, or we feel that it starts a worthwhile d...

Child#2 is by far our most special and most needy of our special needs children. So when the school decides that he may not qualify for all of his special education services, we might have a problem on our hands. We try to find the bright side, or at least the bright spots, when we can, and it makes the problem closer to manageable. For now.  We are here to share our entire intersectional experien...

We are both people of faith, but only Jess is a person of religion. We've  discussed before  how our respective faith backgrounds overlap and how we adapt to a mixed-faith marriage, but now Jess has invited the whole queer Jesus gang to our house. George would probably have an issue with this, if it weren't his best friend and said friend's wife in charge of the group.  We are here to share our en...

When a person transitions, they often find themselves becoming more aware of their status in the world, more aware of themselves, and more aware of others' awareness of them. From the gym to the job to the front porch, this week George discusses how his self-awareness has been affected by his transition experience.  We are here to share our entire intersectional experience with anyone who finds it...

Pronouns are important, especially within the transgender community. Misgendering can be a horrible insult to someone who's had to struggle for the right to use the word that fits. So when Jess is so linguistically-confused and gender-challenged that he can't even get her own pronouns right, let alone everyone else's, they might just have to forgo the use of gendered pronouns for a while.  We are...

Holy podcasts, TransMan! One hundred episodes? Wow!  Lower growth on testosterone is a highly individualized experience, and figuring out how to deal with one's body during any transition can consume a lot of one's time and one's mental/emotional energy. So when Child#2 is so terribly gendered and occasionally gets a little too focused on genitals, George doesn't always have the opportunity to get...

During transition, making the change from one gender's sociocultural expectations to another can be a challenge, especially when someone has trained themself to ignore those differences. For George, and many other FtMs, things like how to groom one's newly sprouted facial hair and how to behave in the bathroom can be learning experiences., and a variety of problem-solving skills can be helpful in...

When two kids go away for holiday break, the "leftover" child is even more special-needy than usual. Between dialing 911 from the kids club, dive-bombing George's new model train with GI-Joes, running wild with classmates at the museum, and just generally being a developmentally delayed seven-going-on-three-year-old, we had our hands full.  So did the interview up our game or jump the shark? Want...

Christmas on the custody calendar means we had our celebrations a little late, but this year was all the more fun with extra family living in town now. Between kids, family we're stuck with, and family we chose, holiday fun was inescapable!  So did the interview up our game or jump the shark? Want more guests, more personal narrative, more discussion of your favorite topic? Let us know at  http://...

In the second part of our conversation with George's cousin, we discuss marriage and family life as queers in the suburbs, and how different it is from the earlier history mentioned last week.    Jess did a little googling and found the Craigslist ad we mentioned at  http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sfo/50077506.html .    Hey, look!! There's a new survey!!! If you liked this episode, or if you...

George's cousin came to visit, and we talked them into sitting down with us by a microphone for our first guest episode. As an AFAB, genderqueer, jewish, former pornographer, they fit right in with our crazy family!    Hey, look!! There's a new survey!!! If you liked this episode, or if you didn't; if you want more guests, or if you don't; if you like discussion of faith, sex, childhood, transitio...

Between birthdays and holidays, this year's schedule is full of opportunities for social awkwardness, gender-y and otherwise, and it has been all sorts of fun. Reviewing these events gives us an opportunity to discuss how George's introversion affects his social anxiety and how it has changed over the years, resulting from both experience and from transition.  We would really appreciate, if you ha...

Like  Jack Sprat and wife , we often end up on opposite sides of a meal, task, or situation. George eats the fatty parts of the bacon, Jess eats the lean. George builds things, Jess sews things. George cleans, Jess cooks. While this is just a function of our respective experience and aptitudes, it often ends up seeming terribly heteronormative.  We would really appreciate, if you haven't taken our...