Transgender Woman Talking

This week, Elle reflects on some of the implications of Trans Day of Visibility. She talks about the benefits and drawbacks keeping secrets (or even maintaining privacy), and the many reasons why trans people may choose to hide aspects of their identities. One of the bits of media Elle references is the documentary "Paris is Burning" (1990) - read more about it here: https://en.wikipedia...

Elle talks about the ways in which transition conjures the experience of grief. Quoting the work of Edith Eder ( https://schizanthusnerd.com/2020/07/26/the-gift , she reflects on her life experiences with grief, some of the things she has lost in transition, and the mystical way in which grief transmutes to gratitude given enough time and magic. Elle references numerous other episodes of the podca...

In this episode, Elle talks about her experiences with traveling over the course of her life. She discusses how this privilege has shaped her worldview and enriched her life. At the same time, she also evaluates how this experience has and will change because of her identity as a transgender woman. Included in this episode are the themes of: privilege, recent legislation outlawing care for transge...

Elle talks about her relationship with family, how the transition has impacted those bonds, and the value of family for queer people in general. She discusses the impact of severed ties -- which sometimes is necessary and important, while also sometimes being incredibly painful and unwanted -- as well as the beauty and challenge of maintaining those ties.  Toward the end of the episode, she t...

Elle discusses her personal and professional experiences with therapy and mental health. She currently is in school to become a LMFT, and has been a beneficiary of therapists many times over the years. In the conversation, she touches on the negative reputation therapist has within the conservative Christian contexts; the reasons why trans people may wish to interact with a therapist; several diff...

In the third installment of the egg-cracking series, Elle discusses additional elements of her experience that led to the discovery and embrace of her identity as a transgender woman. This episode outlines the years of praying Elle had regarding her gender, and how it changed over time. It also explores some of the gender-expansive expressions she took part in from childhood into adulthood. ...

Elle discusses the process of choosing a new name as a part of her transition. Included in this are reflections on deadnames, strategies for choosing names, and ritualizing the new name. Though it is very important, she didn't discuss the process of going about legal-name-changing as it is highly variable from state to state. Resources discussed and referenced in this episode: - Elle's Rite of Tra...

Elle talks about the spat of anti-trans legislation proposed by state legislators in 2023, and the ways in which trans identities are being politicized by far right extremists for votes. She reflects on her own emotional reactions related to these events, and how she has chosen to cope with them in the meantime. Elle closes with a word of encouragement about where we find ourselves as a trans comm...

Elle discusses her routine putting on facial cosmetics. Obviously, this activity is gendered in American culture, and highly intertwined with femininity for perhaps some good but also a lot of frustration. She talks about her feelings of obligation to utilize these products, but also the ways in which they feel affirming. Most of the episode is spent discussing her specific makeup routines, detail...

Elle gives her reaction to some of the news out of the UK this past few weeks regarding the rejection of a self-identification law in Scotland by the British Parliament. One speech, in particular, made the rounds involving a legislator's invoked fear of transgender women. Elle talks about some of the dynamics involved in this and her relationships to accessing "women's-only" spaces such as the toi...

Elle talks about her experiences with and understanding of internalized transphobia. This concept is built upon the academic model of internalized oppression and the work of scholars like Audre Lorde. Elle discusses how internalized transphobia has affected her, and continues to do so, as well as ways in which we as trans people can combat it. One of the resources she references is a book by Janet...

Elle talks about the supposed oxymoron between transgender identities and spirituality or religion. She discusses her faith background (which was dominated by Seventh-Day Adventist Christianity), the ways in which queer people make sense of their faith, how her vocation as a Christian pastor interacted with her gender, and the ways in which she practices spirituality today. While this episode is C...

*Episode content warning: suicide. Elle continues her reflections on sorting out her gender identity with a decidedly more granular look at the details. This continues from the first episode on this theme ( which can be found here here ). Elle shares about her preoccupations with gender identity, and changing her body, which are as old as daytime trash TV shows by Geraldo Rivera and Sally Jesse Ra...

Elle shares a recent experience where she received contemptuous and hostile attacks on social media about a transition ceremony she and her family celebrated together one year ago ( read more about it here ). She talks about how she chose to respond, why haters gonna hate , and what it means when allies show up in support of their transgender siblings. This episode briefly references the psycholog...

Elle talks about weight, losing weight, being fat, the cultural conversation around these experiences. She references the singer Lizzo and her message of body positivity, her history of Bariatric Surgery, American Fat Phobia, Health messaging, and Weight Loss. One great podcast that likewise discusses these themes is Maintenance Phase https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/maintenance-phase/id15354...

In this episode, Elle talks about her experiences learning how to dress herself again after presenting as a man for 30+ years. For trans feminine people in particular, clothing is a really big deal as we go through transition. One of the consequences of rigid American masculinity is a severe restriction in fashion creativity within the norm. For Elle, and for many trans people who present as women...

Elle discusses the DSM-V and its sometimes implicit (or explicit) pathologizing of different ways of thinking and feeling. Digital versions of this book are widely available (here's the first google search result) and rightly so given that it is the dominant tool for understanding mental health problems by professionals today. Elle talks about how the term "Transvestitism" was recently applied in...

Elle discusses her relationship to marriage, and her relationship to her wife of nearly 20 years. In this episode, she explores what it was like before, during, and after transition, including the challenging process of coming out to her partner. Some of the resources she recommends in this conversation include Amanda Jette Knox's book, Love Lives Here and Sue Johnson's Hold Me Tight . Check them...

This is a question that for many trans people, haunts us. Elle talks about the weight of getting the answer correctly and some of the aspects she went through in sorting it out. In the episode, she refers to Dara Hoffman Fox's guidebook on sorting out the answer to this question. She also talks about other resources she utilized and supports she accessed. Send Elle an email at twatpodcasting@gmail...

Elle talks about recent elections in the United States, the politics of being transgender, and therefore the ways in which our bodies are politicized in a hierarchical gender binary whether we choose it or not. She explores the benefits and drawbacks of being invisible to society, including a brief description of Resmaa Menakem's work on bodily trauma in My GrandMother's Hands. She also references...

In this (one day belated) episode, Elle talks about her recent trip back home, to the small rural town she grew up in. In a sense, this activity is a rite of passage for LGBTQIA+ people, who often find the need to move away from originating contexts in order to be fully themselves. Elle discusses her fears and joys with the experience, and references a playlist that she used for coping, Pick Me Up...

Should I transition? This is a question a lot of trans people ask themselves at one time or another. The answer might seem obvious -- and it is for some people -- but it often is a little more complex. Elle talks about the process she went through to make sense of this choice. She reflects on support she received (like Dara Hoffman Fox's book on Gender Identity exploration) along the way, as well...

Elle talks about passing -- as a goal, as a desire rooted in transphobia, and what to do when it isn't possible.  Chat with her at TWATpodcasting@gmail.com

Elle talks about the long, enduring, dreadful, painful, frustrating, confusing, seemingly never-ending, dysphoria-inducing, despair-inculcating, interminable, annoying, lonely, sad, expensive, slow, slow, slow, and even slower process of removing facial hair for transfeminine people. You are welcome to join in the suffering. Reach out to twatpodcasting@gmail.com to say hello!

It's national coming out day this week. Elle talks about her personal experience with coming out, he relationship to this process while still in the closet, the privilege of being able to be "out and proud", and principles for self-disclosure in healthy ways. Asiel Adan Sanchez writes about the coming out narrative and the challenges it can pose, particularly for people of color here.  Chat with h...