The Private School Leader Podcast

About once a week, I ask my wife the same question, “Hey do you wanna know what song is stuck in my head?” She always says, “not really” and then I tell her anyway. It is usually some 80’s pop song unless it is the morning after the Middle School Dance and then it might be The Cupid Shuffle or Love Story by Taylor Swift. Why do songs get stuck in our heads? It’s because our brains HATE open loops...

The longest year of my life was between my 15th birthday and my 16th birthday.   It was only 365 days, but it felt like 5 years. I couldn’t wait to get my driver’s license. My first car was a 1977 Dodge Volare Station Wagon with no hubcaps and a bright yellow paint job. My friends at school called it “The Cream Puff”, but I didn’t care. I had a car and I could drive!   Why am I taking yo...

Every school has them. The teachers discuss them, but do everything they can to avoid them. Administrators cringe when they walk through the front door or call them on the phone. Of course, I am talking about difficult parents at your school. I acknowledge that not every upset parent is a difficult parent . But, if nearly every parent gets upset about something at least once, that means that you a...

I want you to use your imagination. It is the end of the day, you’re getting ready to leave school and you are sitting at your desk. You look back on your day. You feel good about everything that you accomplished. You feel like it was a productive day because you actually got some meaningful work done. Does that sound like something straight out of a fantasy novel? If that sounds impossible, it is...

One of the most embarrassing moments of my life happened on a Thursday afternoon in the fall of 1999. I was driving home from school and my cell phone rang. It was my Administrative Assistant and I will never forget what she said, “Mark, Danielle is here in the Main Office. Are you coming back for her?” I had forgotten my 6 year old daughter at school…. Fortunately, school was like a second home t...

Recently, I was driving home from school and I heard an ad for a debt consolidation company on the radio. The announcer asked, “Are you drowning in debt?” Later that week, I was talking to one of my teachers who told me, “I can’t get caught up. I feel like I am drowning in the deep end of the pool.” The word overwhelmed actually means “to be completely submerged by your thoughts and emotions about...

Since I was a kid, I have always been fascinated with The Death Zone . No, that is not some zombie movie. I actually don’t like zombie movies or horror movies. Give me an action movie or an inspirational sports movie or a comedy or a superhero movie. Just not a zombie movie. Anyways, The Death Zone is a term used by mountain climbers. In mountaineering, the death zone refers to altitudes above 26,...

In November of 2016, my family and I were going through a difficult time. Shortly before Thanksgiving, my wife and I were given a VERY unexpected gift of $600.00 in cash from some VERY kind friends. There were no strings attached and we were told to use the money in any way that we wanted. Within the next 6 days, we had two VERY unexpected car repairs. The total bill for those two repairs was $597...

Have you ever had this conversation with your spouse or partner? “Where do you want to go for dinner?” “Oh, I don’t know, you decide.” “How about sushi?” “No, not sushi.” “OK, how about Thai?” “No, definitely not Thai food tonight.” “Well, then where do you want to go?” “Oh, I don’t know, I want you to decide.” Has this ever happened to you? You get home from a long day at school, you sit down for...

If you have had the time to watch any TV during the last week of the year you have probably noticed commercials for gym memberships, smoking cessation programs and storage bins that will help you get more organized. Tis’ the season for self improvement! We make New Year’s resolutions because we are always trying to better ourselves. The “clean slate” of a new year seems like the perfect time to lo...

I want to ask you to use your imagination about something that COULD be true one year from today . I want you to imagine what your school would be like if, over the next year, the quality of teacher parent communication improved SIGNIFICANTLY. I’m not talking about a small improvement, I’m talking about a massive improvement. What COULD your school look like one year from today? Happier kids? Happ...

In the Summer of 2014, our school was in the midst of a retention crisis . We had families leaving for local public schools, local private schools and some families that were moving out of the city to have their children attend suburban public schools. But then we got to work. By the summer of 2015, we had decreased our attrition rate by 35%. By the spring of 2016, our parent survey results were o...

In May of 2017, my oldest sister, Cathy, passed away from breast cancer. In July of 2018, my twin sister, Ruth, passed away from breast cancer. In February of 2019, my sister Marcia passed away from a heart attack. Three sisters in three years. Fortunately, my school has an excellent Employee Assistance Program and I was able to connect with an outstanding grief counselor named Virginia. We talked...

Do you ever get to the end of the day and feel like you didn't get anything done even though you worked really hard? Does the "tyranny of the urgent" control your day? Do you wish that you felt productive during the day instead of feeling exhausted from putting out fires all day long? Do you ever sit down at your desk and not know what to do next, so you start checking email? If you answered “yes”...

In Episode 5, we talked about the five characteristics that every Servant Leader displays: Demonstrates humility Displays integrity Helps others grow Encourages safe participation by being approachable, visible and having a predictable mood. Inspires others through influence rather than position. I strongly believe that adopting the characteristics of a Servant Leader can dramatically change your...

Nelson Mandela was once asked, “What makes you a good leader?” Mandela said that he was the son of a tribal chief and, when he was a boy, his father would take him to the tribal council meetings. Mandela watched his father closely at these meetings and said that he learned two important things:  1) They always sat in a circle  2) His father was always the last to speak. Nelson Mandela's...

Do some of your students give up easily when faced with a challenging problem or concept? Are your students sometimes too worried about “looking smart?” Do any of your students get extremely upset when they make a mistake on an assignment or get a question wrong on a test? Do any of your students attach their self worth to the grades on their report card? This is a very common problem in our indep...

So, let me ask you a few questions. Have you ever gotten to the end of a day at school and felt discouraged and overwhelmed? Have you ever had a day when you worked really hard, but at the end of the day it felt like you hadn’t accomplished anything? After you walk in the front doors of your school, Does the tyranny of the urgent keep you from working on the parts of your job that are actually the...

On a scale of 1-10, how would you rate your teachers on the quality of their relationships with the parents at your school? On a scale of 1-10, how would you rate your teachers on the quality and frequency of their communication with the parents at your school? Well, if you said anything other than 10 out of 10 for those questions, I’ve got great news for you. Today’s episode of the Private School...

As a private school leader, do you ever feel overwhelmed and exhausted at the end of a long day at school?   Do you wish that your job energized you the way that it used to?   Do you ever feel isolated and lonely as a leader?   Do you ever feel like your job as a private school leader is impossible?   I know that I answered "yes" to all of those questions! The good news is that...