The Nonessential Podcast

This week, Steve does his best to ruin an otherwise competant creepypasta about some nerd kid and his water soluble crank of a grandpa. If nothing else, you get to hear Steve's terrible voicework as he reads Chambergambit's  Before it Rains. Source: Before It Rains | Creepypasta Wiki | Fandom

This week Ben reads a story about Ben called Ben (A True Story). It's a Benstraveganza! If you've ever thought about travelling the world and partying with your best boy pals, this is the creepypasta for you.  Source: Ben (A True Story) | Creepypasta Wiki | Fandom

This week Steve combines two of his favorite things—Nirvana, and doing minimal show prepwork—as he reads Tewahway's grungy creepypasta, Dumb .  Source:  https://creepypasta.fandom.com/wiki/Dumb  

This week, Ben takes a look at a super convoluted ritual said to summon the worthless shepherd (which is apparently the devil.) If you've got a lot of time on your hands, you can try this at home and let us know how it went.  But considering the process itself, please don't. Check out 'Formula of the Worthless Shepherd' Source: Formula of the Worthless Shepherd | Creepypasta Wiki | Fandom

After being knocked overboard by the booming of his own ship's guns, seaman Douglas Hedgal had the fortune of being rescued by a passing fishing vessel, followed by the misfortune of being immediately turned over to the North Vietnamese military and imprisoned in the POW camp known as the Hanoi Hilton.  His captors first insisted the soldier was a CIA agent, until they realized just how incredibly...

Steven Stayner was abducted as a young child, and after years of abuse at the hands of his abductor, he managed to not only escape, to to save another victim.  His brother Cary grew up and developed a meth habit and a penchant for murder.  It's truely a tale of two Stayners; but does either story have a happy ending? No. Sources: The Yosemite Killer: Cary Stayner's Twisted Mind (the-line-up.com) S...

What would happen if you suddenly became aware that your life wasn't your own? That's what happens to the protagonist and their friend in this week's creepypasta:  String Theory by Tesla. Source:  String Theory | Creepypasta Wiki | Fandom

This week, Ben reads a creepypasta that was probably written by Barack Obama, but not the one you're thinking of. It's the anonymously-penned 'On the Mystery of Human Perception.' Get ready for some totally ethical science, y'all!  Source: On the Mystery of Human Perception | Creepypasta Wiki | Fandom

This week, Steve takes an urban legend and writes his own creepypasta version of it in  The Hotel With the Painting . It's about a guy who stays in a hotel that has a painting.  Source: Parmiter, Cindy. Unexplained Phenomenon: The Painting that Came to Life . Exemplore. July 31, 2022. Unexplained Phenomena: The Painting That Came to Life - Exemplore

This week, Ben reads a story about what happens when you get a little too into horror punk, which is apparently a genre. Toxic fandom meets good old-fashioned gumption in the anonymousely written and aptly named  Horror Punk. Source:  Horror Punk | Creepypasta Wiki | Fandom

Though he was born George Edward, he was always really Rube. This week, Steve tells the story of one of the strangest Hall of Famers ever to play the sport. What can we say; the man was as entertaining as he was talented. Check it out. Sources: Rube Waddell Was The Strangest Man In Baseball (factinate.com) Rube Waddell - Wikipedia Rube Waddell: Literally One of the WEIRDEST Guys in History - YouTu...

This week, Ben takes a lil' gander at the whitest Black Panther: Donald Nielson. The man earned his nickname because he was good at crime, but mostly, because he wore a lot of black. But after a robbery went a little off the rails, his whole gameplan changed for the worse. Or, if you host a podcast about terrible people doing terrible things, for he changed for the better.  Sources: Donald Neilson...

This week Steve takes a look at a small Irishman with a big nose. But with great sniffer comes rampant, violent anger. And with rampant, violent anger comes an episode about murder-killing. Check it out! Sources: The terrifying London Underground 'serial killer' who pushed his 30 victims under trains (msn.com) Serial Killer Kieran Kelly (murderuk.com) Kieran Patrick Kelly - Wikipedia

In celebration of the 200th Nonessential episode—and also as a result of the first story being shorter than anticipated, but shut up—Ben reads two  different creepypastas this week!  First up is HumboldtLycanthrope's  The Long List , which is a surprisingly good story about a detective haunted by a victim's trauma and her need for revenge. Or maybe he's haunted by himself? Then there's the anonymo...

In the Olde West, justice was relative. This week, we take a look at serial killer Charles Kennedy, and the (probably worse) man who captured him, Clay Allison.  Sources: 10 Horrifying Stories Of Life In The Wild West - Listverse New Mexico Bad Boy – Clay Allison – Legends of America Charles Kennedy – Old West Serial Killer – Legends of America Colfax County War - Wikipedia

This week, Ben takes a look at serial killer Joel Rifkin. His straight-forward approach to getting away with murder might not be the most unique, or complex, but it was pretty effective. That is, until he made that one classic blunder that brought it all to an unfortunately over-due end. 

One morning in 1828, a young man showed up in the town of Nuremberg, Germany. He couldn't speak, and could barely walk. But as the townsfolk came to know the sixteen year old, the mystery surrounding his past only seemed to deepen.  This week we look at the story of Kaspar Hauser.  Source: Who Was Kaspar Hauser? Inside The 200-Year-Old Mystery (allthatsinteresting.com) Kaspar Hauser - Wikipedia

This week, Ben checks out Empyrealinvective's  Doppledater . When our lovelorne protagonist stumbles across a secretive ritual that promises to bring him the romantic relationship he's always desired, he figures he might as well give it a try. But if you've ever read horror of any kind, you won't be suprised to learn he might have ended up with a bit more than he had bargained for.  Source:  Doppe...

This week, Steve reads the ambitious  Bishop Selby , a tale about a kid, a friend, and a camera. Also a monster and some time travel or something? We'd say you'll understand more once you've listened to it, but we're not so sure about that.  Source:  Bishop Selby | Creepypasta Wiki | Fandom

This week, the Nonessential crew continues it's now two-week run of Ambrose Bierce content with Ben's reading of  An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge.   This was one of Ben's favorite Bierce pieces growing up, but does it hold up lo' these couple of years later? Probably. 

Steve brings a creepy-not'sta to this week's show but the little (well known) author Ambrose Bierce. ' The Secret of MacArger's Gulch'  may be a quote-unquote professional tale, but it shares a lot of similarities with the stuff we normally read 'round here.  So break out your ye-olde-American-English translation dictionaries and strap in.  Source: https://creepypasta.fandom.com/wiki/The_Secret_of...

This week, Ben brings a story of intrique, murder, and a video game that takes serial disembowelment and turns it into something bad. It's Jack the Ripper Game by Illyrias Acolyte, and the moral of the story is to stop replaying old games, and work on that back-log, buddy! Source: Jack the Ripper Game | Creepypasta Wiki | Fandom

This week, Steve brings more than one, but less than three creepypastas to the table, starting with a nice appetiser of  For a Good Cause by Spiksterino, followed by a heaping course of  Come Out, Come Out, Wherever You Are   by BlueQuartz28. For fans of hospital horror, this week is a double-mint delight. For everyone else, well, sorry.     

The world's worst security guarde encounters a paranormal horror of apocalitic proportions in this week's story, 'We Are Your Worst Nightmares.' Read by a sleep-deprived Ben, who really pulled it off quite well.  source: We Are Your Worst Nightmares | Creepypasta Wiki | Fandom

Stalking the wicked streets of Victorian London, Jerome Caminada employed all his wits and cunning in order to catch even the most brilliant criminals. It's said that the character Sherlock Homes is based, at least in part, on Jerome's abilities as a detective. Which makes Jerome's story that much funnier.  Sources: https://themanc.com/feature/jerome-caminada-manchesters-very-own-sherlock-holmes/...