The Men we Are

In the second bonus episode of The Men We Are podcast, we explore the often-overlooked realities of male insecurity, gender shaming, and men’s mental health. From height shaming and income pressure to muscle dysmorphia and emotional suppression, this episode unpacks how modern masculinity is shaped by silent expectations and social ridicule. Why do male body image struggles receive less empathy? H...

In this bonus episode of The Men We Are, we explore a growing and often uncomfortable question: are boys falling behind in education? Looking at measurable data from the UK, US, and across the Western world, we examine literacy rates, exam results, university attendance, school discipline statistics, and dropout rates. The trend is clear: in many areas, boys are underperforming. But rather than bl...

Episode 17 – Season One Finale | The Men We Are Podcast Season one closes not with something new to learn — but with a moment to integrate. In this final episode, we reflect on the journey through emotional awareness, masculinity, identity, grief, attachment, and personal growth. This season was never about fixing men. It was about building awareness, because real change begins when we recognise t...

In episode 16 of The Men We Are podcast, we take the opportunity to explore modern masculinity, emotional intelligence, and what it truly means to be a strong man today. Challenging traditional masculine norms around suppression, performance, and self-sacrifice, this episode dives into emotional regulation, vulnerability, attachment theory, and psychological safety. Through personal stories on rel...

In Episode 15 of The Men We Are, the focus turns to a hidden habit shaping modern masculinity: emotional avoidance. When discomfort shows up such as grief, anxiety, shame, loneliness, most men distract, suppress, or push through. This episode explores why that strategy works short term but quietly erodes mental health, relationships, and emotional presence over time. Using psychology, neuroscience...

In episode 14 of the Men We Are podcast, we explore the quiet, often unspoken grief many men carry through life. We talk about the losses that don’t come with funerals or rituals, the parts of ourselves we left behind to be responsible, strong, or accepted. We unpack disenfranchised grief, identity, emotional avoidance, and why ignoring these feelings doesn’t make them disappear. This episode is f...

In Episode 13 of The Men We Are, we’ll explore where our understanding of love really comes from, and why so many men equate love with usefulness, silence, and emotional self-reliance. This episode unpacks how childhood family dynamics shape adult relationships, emotional availability, and patterns we unconsciously repeat. From intergenerational roles to the fear of vulnerability, we reflect on wh...

This time on The Men We Are, we explore a struggle many men carry quietly; feeling valued for what they provide, but not truly known for who they are. We unpack the difference between being needed and being loved, and how traditional masculinity, emotional suppression, and performance-based self-worth shape modern relationships. We’re looking into male identity, vulnerability, attachment and emoti...

In this raw and honest episode of The Men We Are , we explore the hidden relationship patterns shaping our love lives, known as unspoken contracts. These are the silent expectations we carry when we’re afraid to voice our emotional needs and how they slowly turn hope into resentment. From attachment wounds and emotional armour to missed bids for connection, this episode dives into why men often fe...

In this more powerful episode of The Men we are, we explore why so many men struggle with emotional intimacy, even when they deeply want love and connection. Through an honest reflection on personal upbringing and the impact of unpredictable emotional experiences, we unpack how attachment styles, childhood conditioning, and fear of abandonment shape the nervous system to see closeness as a threat....

In this episode of The Men We Are , we explore male identity, emotional suppression, and the hidden split between the man you show the world and the man you are in private. Why do men live in “performance mode”? How does emotional armour form in childhood and shape adult relationships, loneliness, and disconnection? We talk about authenticity, vulnerability in men, mental health, burnout, and the...

In this powerful episode of The Men We Are , we explore the hidden emotional toll of always being the strong, reliable man everyone depends on. Why do men suppress emotions? How does emotional shutdown lead to burn out, irritability, numbness and disconnection? We unpack male emotional health, stoicism vs suppression, and the silent pressure men carry in work, relationships, and daily life. Learn...

In this episode of The Men we Are podcast, we explore why traditional ideas of growth such as more money, more responsibility, more pressure, stop working for men in their 30’s and 40’s. If you’re doing “well” but feel exhausted, numb, or disconnected, this isn’t failure…it’s feedback. We talk through burnout, emotional suppression, identity, and why real growth now means integrations emotional ca...

In this episode of The Men we Are , we explore what it means to be physically present but emotionally distant, a quiet struggle many modern men live with. As work, responsibility, travel, and constant digital connection blur the line between home and duty, true presence becomes harder to maintain. We talk about partial presence, emotional buffering, guilt, and why men often cope by staying logical...

In this episode of The Men we Are , we explore how the stories men tell themselves shape their identity, emotional health, and sense of meaning. We unpack common narratives like “ I sacrificed everything”, “everyone else got more than me” and “ I missed my chance” , and how these stories quietly fuel resentment and disconnection. This episode therefore looks at men’s mental health through the lens...

In this episode of The Men We Are , we explore how unprocessed grief quietly turns into resentment, and why so many men don’t realise it’s happening. We talk about disappointment, sadness, and the invisible losses men carry; abandoned dreams, closed doors, and the versions of ourselves that didn’t survive. This episode unpacks why “being fine” is often a warning sign, how resentment reshapes our w...

What happens to the lives we didn’t choose, and the versions of ourselves we left behind? In this episode of The Men We Are, we explore a quiet, rarely acknowledged form of grief many men carry: missing people, dreams, freedom, and identities we outgrew but never stopped caring about. This is a raw conversation about masculity, responsibility, gratitude, and the emotional cost of growing up. We ta...

Starting off our series concentrating on men’s challenges and struggles, with the question “are we missing out or have we outgrown things?” I pose the question and work through it, from my perspective as a man in my early 40’s, as an operational long haul airline pilot that is a away a lot, leaving behind so often a young family! Frank, uninterrupted and honest.

A gentle introduction to The Men we Are podcast, giving you an idea of the direction we will go, the mission we have, and the general tone of the podcast. If you get to the end you’ll understand what “it takes a village” means, and I hope you’ll join us and become part of that network.