The Lives in the Balance Podcast

How do you handle a disrespectful kid? The Parents Panel weighs in...and it turns out that the CPS model would view and handle disrespect like any other unsolved problem.

Time-out is, for parents, a very popular behavior management tool. But there are so many things a time-out won't accomplish...in fact, when it comes to understanding and helping your behaviorally challenging child, it's hard to come up with anything productive that a time-out will accomplish.

For lots of folks, one of the great things about this program is that it provides a weekly reminder of the mentality, language, and strategies of the CPS model. This program provides a nice "refresher" on those key themes, accomplished through answering questions Dr. Greene received by email during the past week, including one from a mom whose child had a tough episode at school during the prior w...

Too often...actually, way too often...adults focus on the challenging behaviors a kid is exhibiting rather than on the unsolved problems setting those challenging behaviors in motion. Unfortunately, when we focus on behavior, our intervention options are quite limited. But when we instead focus on solving problems (rather than on the behaviors that are byproducts of those unsolved problems), we're...

Well, the Parents Panel went off without a hitch today, and the Panel grappled with some pretty important topics. First, we heard from a mom who was struggling with viewing her son's behavior through the lenses of lagging skills and unsolved problems...then we discussed how Plan B can be applied to unsolved problems between siblings. The Parents Panel will be back again next month!

Does Plan B help kids take responsibility for their actions? What does "taking responsibility" mean, anyway? How can parents solve problems with their children without time-outs, reward charts, losing control, and feeling like a terrible parent? Is Plan B a viable option when kids are exhibiting unsafe behavior? What should parents do in the midst of explosions? These, and lots of other questions,...

Dr. Greene answered the following questions in this program: Aren't humans (and therefore kids) really selfish beings who only look out for their own interests? What should I do in the middle of an explosion? What should I do if, even after using Proactive Plan B, my child won't follow through on a solution he's agreed to?

Today was our first Parents Panel program, and it was a nice departure from the norm. The Parents Panel -- three moms and a dad -- gathers on the first Tuesday of every month to discuss their experiences in parenting and living with kids with behavioral challenges. And they'll be back next month!

In today's program, we heard back from the mom who was trying to figure out why her son wasn't receptive to participating in Plan B. The mom followed some of Dr. Greene's recommendations from last week's program, and reported on some small signs of progress. We also heard from a mom who was having trouble understanding why her daughter was well-behaved outside the home but exploding inside the hom...

This was the first program since summer vacation, but we just picked up from where we left off. A mom who was having trouble getting her son to participate in Plan B phoned in, and Dr. Greene helped her think about the different factors that might be getting in the way...and what to do next.

If you're the parent or relative of a child or adolescent with social, emotional, or behavioral challenges, this is the program for you. New to the CPS approach? Just getting started with Plan B? Trying to find time for your other kids when your challenging one demands so much of your energy and attention? Having trouble getting a spouse/grandparents/teachers/coaches on board? This is a great oppo...

In this program, Dr. Greene answered emails he's received over the past few weeks covering a wide range of topics, including: the advantages of using Plan B proactively rather than emergently; whether the world mostly demands the skills trained with Plan B or those trained with Plan A; how Plan A tends to cause and perpetuate misery; some tips for making sure solutions are as viable as possible; a...

If you're the parent or relative of a child or adolescent with social, emotional, or behavioral challenges, this is the program for you. New to the CPS approach? Just getting started with Plan B? Trying to find time for your other kids when your challenging one demands so much of your energy and attention? Having trouble getting a spouse/grandparents/teachers/coaches on board? This is a great oppo...

Two parents called in to today's program, and they had some great questions (paraphrasing here): Is individual therapy a good way to promote Collaborative Problem Solving? Why don't some solutions stand the test of time and what should happen when they don't? How crucial is it that both parents be on board with the model? A very informative discussion...and you can listen to the recorded program w...

Can you solve problems collaboratively with a child who's three or four years old? Sure thing. That's the topic of this program. The truth is, Plan B includes ingredients that are crucial the instant a child is born: empathy, trying to understand what's making a child uncomfortable or unhappy, and trying to find realistic and mutually satisfactory ways to address whatever is getting in the kid's w...

Dr. Greene answered some interesting questions today (don't forget, you can ask questions between programs by emailing Dr. Greene through the contact form at www.livesinthebalance.org). The first email was from a mom trying to have some input into her daughter's IEP (Individualized Education Plan) at school...she was wondering if she had the "right" to have input and, if so, how to do it in a way...

In today's program, Dr. Greene responded to emails he's received from parents trying hard to understand their challenging kids, intervene in a more compassionate, effective manner, and -- in some cases -- help the folks at school do the same thing. A very informative program. And you can listen to it anytime!

We had a few callers on today's program, so this was a great opportunity to hear about how a few different parents are trying to put Plan B into action in their homes...along with some of the problems that can pop up along the way. One of the things we discussed was the tendency to skip the Empathy step and therefore arrive at solutions without really understanding the unsolved problem. Another mo...

If you're the parent or relative of a child or adolescent with social, emotional, or behavioral challenges, this is the program for you. New to the CPS approach? Just getting started with Plan B? Trying to find time for your other kids when your challenging one demands so much of your energy and attention? Having trouble getting a spouse/grandparents/teachers/coaches on board? This is a great oppo...

If you're the parent or relative of a child or adolescent with social, emotional, or behavioral challenges, this is the program for you. New to the CPS model? Just getting started with Plan B? Trying to find time for your other kids when your challenging one demands so much of your energy and attention? Having trouble getting a co-parent/ grandparents/teachers/coaches on board? This is a great opp...

Solving problems collaboratively is messy... choppy...uneven...hard. In today's program, two moms called in to talk about some of the problems they're running into in trying to do Plan with their kids (and, in the case of one mom, with the folks at school). So we did some trouble-shooting, and some familiar themes seemed to apply: being really specific about the unsolved problems you're working on...

In this program, Dr. Greene responded to a variety of different questions parents have submitted through the Contact form on the Lives in the Balance website (www.livesinthebalance.org). And then a dad who had called in for some help a month ago phoned in to provide an update on the progress he's making with his two kids, and described some of the difficulties he's having getting his significant o...

In this program, Dr. Greene spoke with a mom who called in to get some help in using Plan B with her challenging 5-year old son. The mom was struggling with some of the key aspects of using Plan B, especially identifying the specific unsolved problems that were reliably and predictably setting the stage for challenging episodes. But it turned out that the boy's challenging behavior (hitting, throw...

In this program, Dr. Greene discusses whether diagnoses are useful in understanding and helping kids with behavioral challenges. He then talked about some of the characteristic ways in which the Empathy step of Plan B can go awry, and discussed how Plan is not only applicable to adult-child problem-solving but also to problem-solving interactions between adults, including parents and teachers.

During this program, Dr. Greene discussed a variety of issues, including the difficulties people encounter when trying to "drill" in the Empathy step (and how to overcome those difficulties); whether one should let a kid know that you're trying to do things differently when you're starting to use Plan B (you can, but the proof is in the pudding); whether a kid's lagging skills are taught through m...