The Joe and Smith Podcast: Read the Book of Mormon with us

The guys are back and they did not land their exclusive guest this week (sad face). Smith sent Joe a picture of the cutest baby tortoises you’ve ever seen. They want you to check out their patreon page- https://patreon.com/JoeAndSmith . A bible? A bible? The more the merrier. Smith refers back to this classic Brother Jake youtube video about the different branches of the church. Smith proposes an...

The guys are back with a new special challenge this week. They’ll get to it a few minutes in. Joe notices what he doesn’t like about dad jokes. Smith gives new meaning to the term ‘superspreader’ and makes Joe giggle. Smith refers back to the Aliki series of sketches from Portlandia. The guys try to self-edit to try to land a tbm guest next week. All sorts of aspersions are cast. Joe gives an atte...

Smith does his best Mark “Jacko” Jackson impression. Joe accuses Smith of sending him down a “Helf hole” after referring to him an article from Psychology Today published in 2017. The article is in reference to a separate scholarly article published in The Journal of Sex Research about so called, ‘sex addiction’ as it pertains to religious people. A bad Ballam shows up, but is quickly cast out. Jo...

Smith asks for an idea about what to call listeners, Joe suggests not to include ‘anti’. Joe talks about his dear friend (not deer friend, aka D’ump ) who is a loving tbm. The guys recap their time together in Denver for the Pavement show in Sep 2022. Smith noted Joe’s breathing. Joe gets a little frustrated by all of the filler in the BOM, just like last chapter. The guys discuss whether or not a...

Show notes are on the way. The guys are recording together in the same room. Smith came to visit Joe so they could go to a concert together. 

Joe questions whether reading the BOM is good for him. Smith suggests for the listener to order a free one, but the missionaries will bring it. The guys accidentally stumble into the church’s new branding campaign to have a BOM in your crotch. They return to the well until the end of the episode. In this chapter, JS warns us that there are some Isaiah chapters coming. Like 13 of them. There are 2...

A Smith and Joe exclusive! Joe takes it upon himself to read this week. It doesn’t take long before the guys devolve into adolescent pp jokes. They wonder who took the longest to take out their endowments out of the last few leaders of the church. Smith doesn’t like to use the word scripture. Joe makes a promise (that he later breaks) about a ‘yo kids are so perished’ joke. This chapter teaches us...

Don’t adjust your podcasting devices, you’re hearing correctly. Smith picks up reading before talking or anything else?!!? Joe tells Smith about why they’re not funny, or maybe they’re only funny to each other. Is it learned or learn-ed? JS is not a fan of smart people. The learn-ed person is kind of the natural enemy of the con artist. Joe makes an ableist joke that seminary teachers would like....

Show notes are on their way, hold your tapirs 

Smith starts us with a wonderful invocation. It gets a little morbid, but Smith tells us about a classic country song: Bury Me Under That Durian Tree. Joe invokes Marty Robbins. Smith wants to know the difference between light and heavy petting. Good thing Joe learned about it in seminary. The guys detour into more Pavement talk. Joe’s #1 fave Pave-cast is Meeting Malkmus: A Pavement Podcast. A cl...

The guys are excited about the shoutout they got at the end of a recent episode of Once Upon a Mormon Podcast. They wish Bro Hyrum well on his gay marriage. Joe reiterates that he wants to be the first gay temple marriage, but doesn’t want to poke fun at actual gays, just the church. Smith has seen a couple of church illustrations of JS translating the BOM into a hat. Joe takes this opportunity to...

Just a head’s up that in this episode, the guys talk about FLDS (and LDS) prophets taking on child brides. The guys start out expressing some frustrations about their preoccupation with sex. Joe questions whether it was brought up as much as it feels like it was, but he still thinks the effect is that it feels like it was brought up all the time. The guys are still bummed that they can’t get gay m...

The guys are excited about their new theme song. Maybe the listener has heard it before, but this is when it debuted for them. Joe makes Smith listen to a wacky recording from Willy Wood. The guys wonder what it would be like to leave the early church and if it would upset JS. Joe returns and reports about Matt Easton, who mentioned being a proud gay son of God in his BYU valedictorian commencemen...

It’s getting hot in Smith’s studio and he claims that sitting on cold rice can help. Joe does a little fact-checking on a supposed JS quote. The guys also mistake where the “save Jesus only” quote is, but they figure it out eventually. The guys aren’t sure whether the JS quote really came from him or not. Smith reminds the listener that if they disagree with him, they’re probably disagreeing with...

Unbeknownst to the listener, the guys have had a long break from the podcast and they missed each other. They already want to make sure that the listener is clued in on a mistake that is coming up on the next episode. Smith tells about what it was like to get a video message from Joe in a sexy, sexy, hospital gown. The guys think they are funny, but they personally know people who are funnier. Smi...

Smith introduces us to a very unlikable version of JS. Joe assures Smith that all sorts of women must be attracted to him. Smith concludes that it's difficult to be single as well as in a relationship. Joe tries to flex his BSA knowledge. Smith plays a similarly unlikable version of Joe in a reenactment of a phone convo with Joe’s dad. Smith wants to watch Encino Man (1992) instead of reading the...

Audiofiles: apologies. It sounds like Joe recorded his part of the conversation in a different room from his mic. The guys rate each other on funniness. They’re probably both too generous. Smith tells Joe about Brigham Morris Young, it’s news to Joe. Joe tells Smith about Ervil LeBaron, who kind of sounds like a Mormon Charlie Manson. Joe is still a little disturbed over the allegations against G...

Smith comes in hot with a bunch of topics that will not be covered. Joe starts talking about The God Makers and its sequel, but he gets distracted easily. The guys appreciated the first one, with the exception of all of the Christian friendly fire. The second one wasn’t great. Joe talks about his experience listening to the Jahndalynn interview with Eddie D (see link below, it’s nearly 4 hours lon...

Smith drops out from a tech issue, and Joe thinks it might be safe to tell how he really feels, but Smith returns before Joe could say anything. Joe makes Smith listen to a clip from the National Press Club interview with DAB and it’s frustrating. Jahndalynn comes to visit for a little bit. Joe gets excited about the multiverse and the singularity, and he’s not even high. Smith tells Joe about the...

Smith starts by trying to open his hard heart, but Joe quickly distracts him with talk of a they/them dog. The guys refer to a great couple of episodes from Jahndalynn’s podcast (links below), about Sister Bednar’s husband giving an address at the National Press Club. Listen to that podcast if you have 7+ hours to spare. Smith isn’t happy with some of the copout maneuvers from the Q&A section...

The guys start off by reminiscing over the bonkers AM radio show Coast to Coast with George Noory. Smith is still frustrated about Rusty’s aversion to the term Mormon. Smith talks about his time as a gun enthusiast and how some of his attitudes have changed. Smith tells Joe about a video of the president of the NRA getting trolled (link below). The corrections department reminded the guys to circl...

Joe remembers a time when the seminary building at his high school was vandalized. He also remembers that his seminary teachers loved responding to criticisms of the BOM, but they wouldn’t share from where the criticisms came. Smith is rereading the JS bio from Bushman and he’s noticing the amount of apologetics within. The guys decide that the whole ‘raising the bar’ for missionaries attitude fro...

Smith had some audio problems on this episode, so bear with us. Do you like the sound of mouse clicks? Let’s find out together. Joe and Smith start by visiting the corrections department for a couple of mispronunciations on the last episode. Who is your favorite dame? Smith’s attorney may have an uphill battle for his piece of the wizarding pie. Joe had a panicky way to start the day. Smith tells...

Smith starts out by trying to convince us that his legal name may be Smith Podcast and the guys have been saying his name the entire time. Smith knows a lot about Penn and Teller. Joe remembers REM’s 1995 performance on Letterman. Joe made a Modest Mouse name-that-tune challenge game for Smith, and Smith kind of blows it out of the water. The guys talk about what they like about indie music, and J...

Smith gives an invocation to our Lord Liam Neesons. The guys discuss laziness versus efficiency. Smith tells Joe about calculated mediocrity. Joe tries to start a rumor that eating a lime will make you lie. He also tells us about his stake president growing up (Guilt Swirly) who may or may not have propagated the rumor that he could tell when someone was telling the truth in an interview. Smith re...