The Ewing Barbecue Podcast

S3, E04 Secrets Valene is back in town and Lucy does not give AF. Lucy is finally starting to be able to vocalize her issues, like: my parents abandoned me to a family that never pays attention to me and the only attention I ever get is from creepy old men who could be my father, yet, because of my Daddy Issues I continually have inappropriate sexual relationships with them! And... she is correct....

S3, E03 Silent Killer Sue Ellen's mom and sister Kristin come to Dallas to visit baby John Ross. While the Ewings are picking them up at the airport, Cliff is picking up his dad Digger. Awkward! More awkward is that both Digger and Kristin are being played by different actors now. At the Ranch, Kristin spends all her time eavesdropping and getting all the dirt on the drama happening there. What co...

S3, E02 Whatever Happened to Baby John, Part 2 Baby John has been kidnapped, y'all! I mean, honestly, it seems to be what happens when you're a Ewing, so you might as well get it over early, right? Everyone is a suspect! Cliff! Ames and Garr! Randos calling in! Cliff and Bobby argue a lot, but end up teaming up to break a lot of HIPPA rules.  Join us, won't you?    The Ewing Barbecue socials: Bour...

S2, E12 Fallen Idol Bobby's BFF from college Guzzler shows up out of the blue. Pam is NOT impressed! They stay out all night drinking, sexually harass waitresses and basically act like a couple of douchecanoe dude bros. Pam is even MORE unimpressed - MOSTLY after Guzzler hits on her... several times. Guzzler also hits on 17 year old Lucy. *serious side eye* Pam and JR actually agree on something f...

S3, E1 Whatever Happened to Baby John Part 1 Season 3 PREMIERE!!!!  The show has a bigger budget we can TELL!  Sue Ellen has emerged from her coma and no one ever talks about it again. Mmmm kay. She clearly has postpartum depression and some trauma from 1.) going through alcohol withdrawal 2.) being in a car crash 3.) being in a COMA and 4.) having a freaking emergency c-section!!!! Everyone's all...

The one where Sue Ellen breaks out of the institution, steals a car and runs into a tree! Oh, and John Ross is born.  Sue Ellen has been committed. Girl is NOT happy about it! She's lounging in her own pity party whilst wearing pearls and panty hose in her room. Shady nurse takes advantage and trades her booze in a mouth wash bottle for her pearl necklace (and you know those babies are real!) She...

The one where Sue Ellen is institutionalized. Sue Ellen is in her 7th month of pregnancy, and 7th drink of the day... and it's 2pm. Girl is drankin' in the parking lot of her Ob/gyn appointment from a flask! It's... not great, Bob. Luckily for Sue Ellen, people in the 70s didn't seem to think drinking whilst pregnant is all that bad (WHAT?!). But when her doc calls her out on being wasted at her a...

Season 2, Episode 22: The Outsiders Original Airdate: 16 March 1979 Written by Leonard Katzman  Directed by Dennis Donnelly    The one where Ray meets Donna.   The Ewings are having trouble with both Cliff Barnes at the OLM and the Mainwaring family (guess they're mad about Lucy "calling off the wedding...." *eye roll*) So, they enlist the help of Senator Sam Culver. Sam, who is old as FAQ, is mar...

Season 2, Episode 21: Royal Marriage Original Airdate: 09 March 1979 Written by Camille Marchetta  Directed by Gunnar Hellström   The one where Dallas was ahead of its time in treating a gay character well.   Lucy is dating Kit Mainwaring. They a super attractive couple who go to a lot of discos and... play a lot of backgammon! Truth be told, Kit is giving off a lot of "Friends Zone" vibes that 18...

Season 2, Episode 20: Call Girl  This is the one where they play a lot of racketball! Bobby really wants Pam to come back to live at Southfork. JR does NOT! Instead of moving back, Pam decides to randomly move in with a friend, named LeeAnn, who  she meets on the set of a photoshoot for The Store. (What is Pam's actual joooooobbbb?????!!!!) At the racketball club (is that a thing?) Pam and LeeAnn...

Season 2, Episode 19: Sue Ellen's Sister   Sue Ellen's little sister visits Southfork - invited by JR. JR puts the attractive (and barely 18) Kristin in front of Bobby, who is depressed because Pam refuses to come back to Southfork to live. Bobby doesn't hate it. Sue Ellen and Lucy see through Kristin's attempts to woo the married Bobby and spend the entire episode heavily side-eying her.  We link...

Julie's DEAD! And guess who decided to go visit her apartment and put his fingerprints ERRRWHERE?! Our old buddy Cliff, that's who! Cliff... Cliff... Cliff... Now he's on trial for murder and the only one who can help is... a Ewing?    The Ewing Barbecue socials: Facebook:https://www.facebook.com/groups/EwingBBQ/ Instagram : EwingBBQ Twitter: BBQEwing 

SEASON 2, EPISODE 17: THE RED FILE, PART 1   JR and Julie Grey are back on gettin' it on, but since Julie cheated on JR once with Cliff Barnes... he just doesn't trust her anymore. While they're out of town, he has her apartment searched for any copies of The Red File. He has hired horrible people, so they don't find the key that's hidden IN HER JEWELRY BOX!  Oh yeah, Jules 100% made copies like a...

Season 2, Episode 16: Julie's Return!  Julie Grey (Tina Louise from Gilligan's Island) has returned to Dallas from a short stint in New York. She doesn't tell anyone she's back, and soon after starts stalking Jock. Eventually, she woos him with her sweater dresses, feathered hair and listening skills! The two become inseparable for lunch dates, shopping sprees and quiet dinners at Julie's apartmen...

JR has cheated on Sue Ellen for the last time!!! (I'm sorry, I ALMOST made it through that sentence without laughing, LOLOLOL) Sue Ellen is taking matters (and Cliff Barnes' junk) into her own hands!  That is... until JR finds out.  Podcast Recommends: Cookies by Carly:  https://www.instagram.com/cookiesbycarly/   The Ewing Barbecue socials: Facebook:https://www.facebook.com/groups/EwingBBQ/ Insta...

Season 2, Episode 14: Home Again   The one where Miss Ellie's brother Garrison comes back from the dead and turns everyone into a zombie like him! Just kidding, he comes back from the dead and Miss Ellie decides to hand over Southfork to him. JR is NOT playing.      The Ewing Barbecue socials: Facebook:https://www.facebook.com/groups/EwingBBQ/ Instagram: EwingBBQ Twitter: BBQEwing 

Season 2, Episode 13: Kidnapped   The one where hooligans try to kidnap JR, but end up kidnapping Bobby instead. Everyone wears amazing bell bottoms, and Jock has some pimp ass glasses!      The Ewing Barbecue socials: Facebook:https://www.facebook.com/groups/EwingBBQ/ Instagram: EwingBBQ Twitter: BBQEwing 

Season 2, Episode 11 Triangle  Original airdate: November 26, 1978 Written by: Camille Marchetta Directed by: Vincent McEveety   The one where JR and Ray stop being friends - for good.   The Ewing Barbecue socials: Facebook:https://www.facebook.com/groups/EwingBBQ/ Instagram: EwingBBQ Twitter: BBQEwing   

Season 2, Episode 10: Act of Love Sue Ellen is knocked up! JR finds out whilst with one of his mistresses, and Sue Ellen breaks off her affair with Cliff. Everyone celebrates while drinking champagne... including the mother to be! Oh, 1970s..... There's also a back storyline where Pam is trying to have a life and career and Bobby is all, "but it inconveniences me!!!! whine, whine, whine!". Hard ey...

Season 2, Episode 9: Survival    You guys! JR FINALLY has a reason to use his Safari Outfit when the small plane he and Bobby are in crashes! Meanwhile, as authorities are looking for the boys (are they even still alive??? There are 12 more seasons.... spoiler alert - they are!) and the remains of the plane, the family reacts. Most importantly, Miss Ellie finally comes out as the "Do NOT even fuck...

Season 2, Episode 8: Election Cliff Barnes is running for the State Senate and the Ewings are pretty pissed about it. Mostly since he's polling crazy high! They can't find any dirt on him until: JR lays some homophobic BS out at the table one night accusing Cliff of being gay and Pam flips her shit and yells that he used to be engaged. Pause. What happened? Why didn't they get married? Pam: "Uhhhh...

The Ewings are having an 18th birthday party for Lacy... oh wait, I guess her name is Lucy? They basically have no idea what her name is or why she lives there. They don't even seem to care if she's there, so girl steals JR's car and gets the fuck outta dodge. (They 100% have the party without her.....) She ends up hitchhiking (WTF?!??!!!) and gets picked up in a scary serial killer van by BJ from...

Season 2, Episode 6: Double Wedding When Pam was 15 she went on a cheerleading trip and ran off to Mexico to marry a guy shipping off to Vietnam! Now that guy is back in town causing trouble. Ooooh controversy! JR is totally stoked by this. Pam swears the marriage was annulled, but no one can find a copy of the annulment papers. Oh no! What will happen! Join us to find out.   

Season 2, Episode 5: Black Market Baby Sue Ellen REALLY wants to have a baby! The problem is that JR won't sleep with her - even when she drunkly challenges his virility. So, she decides to take matters into her own hands and adopt a baby. The adoption agency says it's gonna take 3 years because all these single women of the 70s having premarital sex are taking birth control and having abortions i...

Season 2, Episode 4: Bypass Jock has a heart attack! Everyone feels guilty... Lucy tries to bang Ray again. Sue Ellen drunkly dreams of running Southfork. Meanwhile, Jock recovers in the hospital with his chest oiled up like he's about to pose for the Sexy Rancher 1979 calendar.