The Emotionally Healthy Leader Podcast

In over four decades of leadership, I've come to the conclusion that one of the  biggest gaps in our leadership training  comes down to one essential skill... Creating safety where everyone around you feels empowered to communicate clearly and honestly. Without this skill, church teams remain silenced - unable to speak truth and creating the conditions for an environment of frustration, resen...

Could you forgive someone if you knew they murdered your entire family? It sounds far-fetched. But this is the question posed in  As We Forgive -  a documentary about the tragedies of the 1994 Rwandan genocide   and the stories of two women as they came face to face with the men who killed their families. It provoked the question -  Would I be capable of forgiving my enemies like this? This is the...

Language builds culture. Recently on the podcast, I shared  5 timeless leadership axioms  - portable and powerful phrases that have become adopted by emotionally healthy leaders all around the world. For example..." Jesus may be in your heart, but grandpa is in your bones". It's an easier (and more playful) way of getting at the truth that everyone is deeply affected by their family...

Movements with longevity are sustained through shared, easily understood language. This most often comes through the development of axioms - short, memorable phrases that capture the essence of truth in simple ways. Reflecting on the last two decades of leading Emotionally Healthy Discipleship, I've been able to identify at least 10 core axioms (probably more like 25!) that have stood the tes...

According to the  World Christian Encyclopedia ,   the fastest growing stream of the church is the Pentecostal/Charismatic movement. In terms of overall numbers, it represents 644 million Christians world wide. This is 8.3% of the world population. By 2050, it will reach over 1 billion people. Unbelievable! We need the power of God, gifts of the Holy Spirit, signs and wonders for the global missio...

For leaders, one of the most frustrating parts of  decision-making  is this... It....takes....time. Sure, sometimes quick decisions are necessary. But most consequential decisions (that shape the future of your life, church, and ministry) require the ability to slow down and wait. Usually for longer than is comfortable for you. In order to let your judgments (discernments) come from deep within, y...

Decision-making is primarily about discernment. It's the ability to make decisions that align with God's will for your life and ministry. The truth is - discernment is an art. It takes practice, attention, and a lifetime to develop. But if there is one core practice that is the foundation of discernment, it is learning to pay attention to the movement of God in your own soul through cons...

One of the primary tasks of spiritual leadership is the ability to make prayerful, wise decisions. Yet many leaders find it difficult to invest the time and space necessary for sharp discernment. The result is that our decisions become dull, lacking precision and power. Over time, flippant decision-making inflicts tremendous consequences on us and those we lead. In the first episode of this new po...

Years ago, we were doing some strategic planning at the church I had founded in Queens, NY. We were reflecting on what contributed to our growth over a 26 year period. A single word kept reappearing on the whiteboard - "BASEMENT" How did we disciple so many quality leaders, many of whom are still leading today? Hint: it wasn't what happened on the stage. It was what happened in the...

Eight years after planting New Life Fellowship Church in Queens, I was exhausted. The pressure of preaching and teaching weekly messages , along with the rest of my leadership responsibilities, left me depleted. Although our ministry was growing, I often felt like I was gaining the world but losing my own soul.   What I lacked, and what so many of us still lack today, is  a way to teach and preach...

Affliction. It's a topic that nobody wants to talk about (including me). But as it relates to TRUE LEADERSHIP, it is a costly mistake to avoid our afflictions. Why? Because this is how God matures us into spiritual mothers and fathers of the faith. By "affliction," I'm referring to any kind of hurt, loss, betrayal, broken relationship, abandonment, or disorienting circumstance....

One of the greatest threats to leading with joy is giving into the temptation of overcommitment. When our lives are crowded, cluttered, and cramped, it is difficult to hear God and live in loving union with Him. The irony is, we can "fit in" regular practices of Sabbath and silence while still being driven by an overscheduled life. But how do we resist this temptation? Silence, solitude,...

Many leaders today "know" the importance of a slowed-down spirituality. So why do so many continue to feel overloaded and over scheduled, often working 3 jobs, taking on new side hustles, and remain driven by the fear of missing out? Why can't we stop overcommitting? Listen, I know this struggle firsthand. And I've found that it goes deeper than knowing intellectually and theol...

Recently we crossed an unbelievable threshold with the  Emotionally Healthy Leader Podcast  with over 10 million lifetime podcast downloads. I couldn't be more surprised, humbled, and thankful for this milestone moment.  I say "surprised" because back in 1996, when we first started, the term "emotional health" was considered heretical in much of the church! Now 25 years la...

I was recently asked by someone... "Pete, if you could go back and give yourself advice in the different seasons of life and ministry, what would you say?" The truth is – every decade has its own unique invitations. As I reflected, I realized that I would say something slightly different to myself at 25, 35, 45, and even 55. Today on the podcast, I share with you some fresh insights as I...

Many of us have come to believe that the Christian life is synonymous with constant happiness. We think we're on the right track if the trajectory of our lives is "up and to the right" - always improving, always leveling up. But this way of thinking leaves little room for grief and sadness. When we experience real loss, we see it as an abnormal alien invasion, not as a divine invita...

I was 19 when I came to Christ and started my training as a Christian leader. As a young leader, I was taught many valuable things.  But nobody told me about the most powerful gift leaders can bring to those they lead. But I've learned (through my own failures) that the greatest gift leaders can actually give is becoming an "incarnational presence" – being DEEPLY PRESENT with people...

As a pastor or leader, your primary role is to develop and disciple others. More than simply "getting things done", we are called to prioritize the growth and maturity of the people and leaders around us. We do this by learning particular skills and tools with which we can coach our leaders, our team, and those in our ministry.    One game-changing tool that I use to coach others is call...

Not long ago I was spending time with some young pastors, hoping to learn how leaders today define ministry success. The word "influence" seemed to be a common theme. Many leaders obsess over growing their followers, gaining digital credibility, and creating captivating sound bites for social media. While there is nothing wrong with having a following, there exists a pressure and allure...

Does the end of the year feel like a complete whirlwind? For most pastors and leaders Christmas activities dominate the month of December and then we only get a week's break before launching into a new year! In January, pastors face the difficult task of vision-casting, goal-setting, and steering the direction of the church for the next 12 months. Too often, our planning is driven by: Expecta...

Great leadership is about knowing who you are and who you are not. In  part one of this podcast series , I shared the first 5 marks of a highly-differentiated leader. On today's podcast, I continue by sharing 5 more attributes that deserve careful consideration. Why? Because the cost of lowly-differentiated leadership is enormous: We diminish the long-term impact of our ministries. We allow t...

Everything rises and falls on the character and inner life of the leader. The apostle Paul seemed to believe so as well. He writes to his spiritual son Timothy that  " whoever aspires to be an overseer desires a noble task. " (1 Tim. 3:1)   I believe the great need of our day is for us to become godly, highly-differentiated leaders while developing other leaders in the same way. In today...

Every day, people all around us live in a chronic state of dread, anxious about what tomorrow will bring. Nations and economies are crumbling. News media agitates our deepest fears. It often feels like the ground is shaking beneath our feet. In a time like this, it is critical that we continue to LIVE and LEAD out of deep rest in Christ. But how do we break free from the gravitational pull of bad...

Hiring new staff (paid or volunteer) is one of the most difficult responsibilities of church leadership.  The difference between the right hire and the wrong hire will have long-term consequences in your church. Two weeks ago on the podcast, I brought the first part of "Emotionally Healthy Hiring (Paid or Volunteer)", in which we covered  the first 7 principles that leaders must consider...

Churches around the world are rebuilding in a post-pandemic world. Leaders are assembling new teams and desperately trying to fill vacant positions. The temptation to cut corners in your hiring process (paid or volunteer) is ENORMOUS . When you feel the pressure to onboard a new worship leader or children's pastor in order to keep "the wheels on the bus", it's easy to make poor...