The Courageous Life

To fail is human. It’s built into our experience from childhood. We begin to walk and we fall. We begin a project, we work toward a goal, or we start a business and we may fail. We experience these moments - When we are engaged in learning,  When we are moving toward something we care about  And we come up short. And in these moments there is an opportunity for practice - Learning to relate to the...

Failure is an experience that is deeply embedded into our lives.  As we learn to walk we fall.  As we learn to ride a bike we (usually) fall again.  And yet even though it is so familiar, so intertwined with our journey through life, not all failure is created equal.  Which brings up important questions: How do we fail well?  What are the crucial distinctions that might help us separate good failu...

In my most recent interview with Dr. Nate Klemp,  who is author of the new book Open: Living With an Expansive Mind in a Distracted World , w e got the opportunity to talk deeply about opening more to life.  Are you familiar with this feeling of openness?  Perhaps for you it’s a sense of curiosity?  Or a feeling of expansion in the mind, or in the body?  Maybe it's being interested, receptive...

With the avalanche of information we get every day, closing down our minds and hearts seems to be the only way to survive. We close to ourselves by compulsively checking our devices. We close to each other by getting caught in echo chambers of outrage. But what if there’s another way? In this climate of distraction and division, what if there’s a path back to a way of living that is expansive, cre...

Yesterday I released a conversation with Dr. Vanessa Patrick. Vanessa is a professor of marketing and the associate dean for research at the Bauer College of Business at the University of Houston. Among other things, Vanessa researches what she calls the empowered refusal - A way of saying no that stems from your identity.  This empowered form of saying no becomes possible when you have clarity ab...

Have you ever said yes when you really wanted to say no? Has saying no ever been a challenge for you? These are such common experiences that today’s guest, Dr. Vanessa Patrick has written a powerful new book that addresses them head on: The Power of Saying No: The New Science of How to Say No that Puts You in Charge of Your Life. Dr. Patrick researches what she calls the empowered refusal , which...

How can we meet the storms in our lives (both big and small) with greater balance, courage, wisdom, and love? It’s a huge question, I know. And the list of practices and answers is long, varied, and personal.  I certainly don’t have "the answer" for you.  What I do have are some observations and practices I’ve found to be particularly useful.  Today I will offer 3 simple practices that c...

Today’s conversation has been 5 years in the making. In 2018 I sat down with Mark Nepo, one of the great spiritual teachers, authors, and poets of our time. During our conversation he posed a question to walk with. Inviting me (and those tuning in) to live into the answers over time. When my heart begins to close, how do I open it again? For 5 years I've been exploring this question with some...

Dr. David Treleaven is a a writer, educator, and trauma professional whose work lies at the intersection of mindfulness and trauma. At the heart of David’s work is the notion that mindfulness is more powerful when combined with an understanding of trauma. Part of what’s behind this is the growing realization over the years that mindfulness meditation isn’t all good. There are a number of potential...

In her new book, Seeing Others: How Recognition Works, and How it Can Heal a Divided World , author and acclaimed Harvard sociologist, Michèle Lamont, makes the case for reexamining what we value to prioritize recognition—the quest for respect and dignity—in an age that has been defined by growing inequality and the obsolescence of the American dream.     In today's conversation we'll ex...

We all want to belong. But to do so, we must first face our own need for belonging and how that need is often thwarted. In his new book Reunion, Leadership and the Longing to Belong , today's guest Jerry Colonna argues that only through radical self-inquiry can we come home to ourselves and others and, in doing so, create systemic belonging—homes—for everyone. In today’s conversation Jerry an...

When the rain is falling, it’s dark out, and the storm seems unrelenting, Above the clouds the sky is blue and the sun is shining. All things are true . Someone’s last breath is met across time and space with the sounds of an infant crying, The signal of a new arrival. All things are true. As divorce papers are approved and a marriage meets an end, A preacher announces, "you may now kiss the...

What if there is a possibility of tapping into a heightened awareness of the world around you and your place in it? A possibility of moving from an achievement orientation, where so often the questions center around what do I want and how can I  get it? To a more expansive, open and receptive way of relating to our experience as human beings? Today’s guest will is Dr. Lisa Miller. She’s a psycholo...

Is it possible to turn beneficial states like gratitude, joy, calm, courage, grit, and compassion into enduring traits? And if it is, how do we go about doing it? I remember hearing these questions many years ago when I first came across the work of Dr. Rick Hanson At the time he was making a research-backed argument that said...yes, indeed we can and then provided a road map for practice. Here&ap...

Humans are universally equipped with a capacity for spirituality and our brains become more resilient and robust as a result.  In Dr. Lisa Miller’s book The Awakened Brain she highlights groundbreaking research, including MRI studies genetics research, epidemiology, and more. All of which illuminate a surprising science of spirituality and how to engage it in our lives. This week I  will release o...

From the climate crisis, to oppression, anxiety, and burnout - How do we meet the most pressing challenges of our time from a place of courage, integrity, and love? Today’s guest is Oren Jay Sofer and this question is the centerpiece of exploration in his beautiful new book. Your Heart Was Made for This . In it Oren offers 26 different contemplative practices intended for meeting challenges and ad...

Today marks the launch of Oren Jay Sofer’s new book: Your Heart was Made for This: Contemplative Practices for Meeting a World in Crisis with Courage Integrity and Love .  Oren has been on the Courageous Life before and has been a significant teacher in my life, and the lives of so many around the world.  So today, to honor the release of his book we have a bit of a special episode of Practicing C...

Do you ever have times where the mind won’t stop thinking about what’s next? Things you need to do, actions to take etc?  This is such a common experience, and while quite useful at times, At other times this cycle isn't helpful (for a variety of reasons): Maybe you can’t take action at the moment Or you have double-checked or thought through the plan many times already Or maybe you need a bi...

There are moments in life that decide your fate. They ripple into the future and dictate how you experience the world in the moments that follow; either positive and uplifting, dark and chaotic, or flat and dull. What if you could recognize these moments before they seized control of your life? What if you could use them to set sail for a better future?  What if all moments, big and small, could b...

“How can we create conditions for other people to be courageous?” This is a question I  have been exploring for years. On The Courageous Life Podcast, and beyond. Part of the reason for such a deep interest in this question stems from the common and celebrated narrative (particularly in the US) of the lone hero. That romanticized myth of pulling oneself up by their bootstraps and doing it all on t...

"If we are looking for light in the darkness, sometimes it doesn't appear until we create it."    - Samantha Novick In moments of great tragedy, pain, uncertainty, loss, and suffering I often look for perspective, and for practices, that help me to find some light in the darkness. Often these practices (for me) are found in community, with friends, and through conversations on the p...

Today's episode is the first in a new stress and anxiety series we're doing on the podcast.  Over the coming weeks we'll share deep, informative, and practical conversations with some of the leading experts in these arenas.  Each episode will offer insight into how to work with these very common (and often challenging) aspects of our lives more effectively and in ways that lead to g...

Years ago I sat down for a conversation with Dr. Kelly McGonigal, who is arguably one of the world’s leading experts on behavior change.  During our time together I asked her to name a few of her greatest insights about what contributes to being able to successfully change behavior (which can be incredibly difficult).  Learning skills that increase the capacity to tolerate distress was right at th...

At the end of each day we do a mental scan, reviewing our experiences from that day. When people do this, they often find: The moments where they moved outside of their comfort zone The moments where they pushed themselves And the moments where they were courageous Are often the moments that they end up being most proud of. Additionally, leading courage researcher, Dr. Jim Detert asserts that when...

Speaking in public is one of people's greatest fears.  Today's practice focuses on a brief process for overcoming this fear.  Its a mindset shift from performance to curiosity that begins with 4 simple words. If you have a moment where you will be speaking, interviewing, facilitating, coaching, hosting, or just generally interacting…and you find yourself getting nervous Give this a try,...