The Caring Death Doula

Some grief doesn’t get “approved” by the people around you. It shows up when someone says you didn’t know them, didn’t have them long enough, or shouldn’t still be thinking about it.  I share a personal, tender look at that kind of invisible grief, starting with my father-in-law who died just eight months into my marriage, and the ache of knowing my children never got to meet the grandpa who shoul...

Your hand reaches for the phone before your brain catches up. For a split second, it feels perfectly natural to call your dad, your mom, your person and then reality hits, and the grief rushes in. I share a moment that happened to me this morning: that honest, almost comforting impulse to ask my dad a question, followed by the ache of remembering he’s not here to answer.  If you’ve had that experi...

In this episode, we talk about why so many of us hesitate to reach out after someone grieves the death of a loved one and how that silence can grow when weeks turn into months.  Frances makes the case that it is not too late, that your words carry real weight, and that a simple check-in can help someone feel less alone in grief.  • normalising conversations about death, grief, loss and change  • w...

In this episode, I discuss how a book  can be something we look forward to until it suddenly feels like a mirror. I sit down ready to gather grief resources and instead I’m stopped cold by a story that’s too close to home. With my brother-in-law’s death still fresh, the rawness on the page makes me close the cover and cry. And, I have to admit what so many of us think but rarely say out loud: I wa...

A birthday can be a celebration and a gut punch at the same time, especially when it arrives only weeks after a funeral.  Today I’m holding space for my brother in law’s family and anyone staring down a hard date: your loved one’s birthday, an anniversary, the first holidays, or even a small tradition like “the day the pond opens” that used to belong to someone you love.  These milestones don’t ju...

Ever have a day where your heart says not tonight and the world keeps asking anyway? We start right there—at the honest edge of not wanting to show up—and talk about how grief reshapes energy, attention, and appetite for connection. Frances, the Caring Death Doula, invites us to treat that resistance as information, not failure, and to claim the small, life-giving boundary of no when our bodies as...

Grief doesn’t ask if you’re ready. It arrives and sometimes it knocks you flat.  In this episode, I open up about the death of my brother‑in‑law and how the shock unsettled not just my thoughts but my body, even with years of training as a grief educator and death doula. The point isn’t to prove we’re strong; it’s to learn how to be gentle with ourselves when grief hits. I share practical ways to...

Plans unraveled, but the heart of our work held steady. We set out to share the origin story behind “the caring death doula” for a milestone 50th episode and ran into tech roadblocks—so we did what grief teaches best: we stayed present. This conversation leans into honesty, gratitude, and the quiet courage it takes to feel what you feel without apology. Together, we name the messy middle of loss—a...

In this episode, Frances, The Caring Death Doula, pushes back on grief-shaming and makes the case that a simple “I’m sorry for your loss” is better than nothing. Frances shares how to move from polite words to real presence, and how to invite stories, hold tears, and build a culture of support without perfection. • why simple condolences still matter • how not reaching out deepens isolation • pres...

In this episode, your host, Frances, shares raw moments after two funerals and the quiet that followed. She names the numbness of early grief and the strength in saying “I’m not okay.”  She offers  encouragement to rest or to return to routine, and permission to reject timelines. • fresh grief after family losses • numb days and decision fatigue • permission to rest without guilt • returning to ro...

Grief doesn’t follow rules, and it may sometimes not even arrive one loss at a time.  This week, your host, Frances, shares a raw, intimate account of attending two funerals in four days while holding the quieter ache of a father whose memory feels too easy for others to forget. The contrast is striking: the shock and numbness surrounding a brother‑in‑law’s passing versus the slow, complicated sor...

Grief doesn’t wait for the calendar to clear, and it rarely gives a warning. After an unexpected death in our family, we sit with the shock, the numbness, and the way priorities snap into focus.  In this episode Frances discusses what do people really need in those first days—and in the weeks when everyone else returns to normal? We talk candidly about the urge to gather our children and grandbabi...

In this episode, we move through a week of shock after a sudden family death, a second funeral in town, and the strange mix of a full house and private numbness. We explore how small rituals, better listening, and humane workplaces can hold grief with more care. • sudden loss and the protective fog of numbness • contrast between anticipated and unexpected death • family gathering as comfort and st...

The phone rings, life splits, and the air goes thin.  A moment you won’t forget.  That’s the feeling we step into in this episode: raw, sudden grief after an unexpected death in the family, the kind that makes time wobble and ordinary tasks feel impossible. I share what the numbness is like, how disbelief shields the heart in those first days, and why even people who think they’re “ready” are caug...

A massive winter storm sets the stage for a conversation we’ve needed to have: you can plan, but you can’t schedule your heart. In this episode, I look at how grief behaves more like weather than a checklist—surprising, shifting, sometimes quiet, sometimes relentless—and why that doesn’t mean you failed to prepare.  I talk about loss in its many forms: the death of a loved one, the goodbye to a be...

Grief can feel endless until, suddenly, it doesn’t—for a moment. In this episode I share a tender look at how relief sometimes arrives unannounced: a letter from a transplant recipient whose life was saved, a beloved house passing to someone who truly loves it, a monarch butterfly gliding through the yard and sparking a memory that warms instead of stings. These aren’t solutions; they’re gentle sh...

In this episode I ask  whether grief feels heavier during the week or on the weekend, then unpack why sorrow refuses schedules. A planned Monday–Thursday structure gives way to presence, flexibility, and care after life delivers unexpected news. • why rigid episode themes can miss real needs • the myth of timelines and stages in grief • support for the newly grieving and long-term grievers • guida...

In this episode, I share the news of a dear friend losing her son arriving like a punch to the chest, and how it raised a question many of us carry: how do you show up when the worst happens and you’re not even sure you’re “close enough” anymore?  I open up about such a  moment and share the small, steady acts that help someone breathe when the ground falls away—because grief is personal, but it s...

In this episode, Frances, The Caring Death Doula, speaks to those entering a new year with fresh grief and no desire to plan beyond today. She offers permission to slow down, ignore unhelpful comments, and focus on small steps. • naming fresh grief as numb and foggy • granting permission to feel and cry • narrowing focus to the next hour or day • releasing pressure to plan the month or year • sett...

Here in the first episode of our second year, we restate this as a safe space to come if you are grieving. We name losses that don’t fit tidy boxes and reject rigid rules about how grief should look. We affirm that grief is love we carry forward and that no one gets to set our  pace. Join Frances, The Caring Death Doula as she discusses: • naming grief beyond death, including pets, retirement and...

We close a season and a year by naming a simple truth: grief has no rules, and love doesn’t end. We offer permission to feel, encouragement to say their names, and practical ways to show up for one another. • ending the season with gratitude and care • no right or wrong way to grieve • rejecting social timelines and pressure • showing up with meals, calls, presence • listening more than fixing • s...

Christmas morning can hurt when grief is close. I speak softly to anyone carrying loss today, offering permission to feel, simple ways to cope, and the steady reminder that being seen can help you get through the hours. • holding space for listeners grieving on a holiday • naming both fresh grief and long-ago loss • recognizing pressure to perform joy and host • inviting boundaries, rest, and smal...

A birthday arrives, the phone stays silent, and what lingers is not just absence but the weight of everything left unsaid.  In this episode I share a personal story about my birthdays and my dad. We didn’t have the closest relationship, but  he always called first thing in the early hours to wish me a happy birthday. That simple ritual—quiet, consistent, and unspectacular—became a compass for what...

Today, in this episode, I speak to those carrying fresh or long-held grief during this season. I offer calm words, gentle practices, and a reminder that one step; one breath at a time is all you need to focus on today.  • simple sensory self-care • journaling and breathing practices • choosing quiet • asking what you need today • moving forward without letting go of love If you are grieving today,...

In this episode, we reaffirm this podcast as a  space for people who are grieving and affirm that there is no right or wrong way to mourn. You are other to stand firm against shame, hold to your pace, and see tears as proof of love, not failure. • no judgment and no guilt while grieving • grief has no time limit or rulebook • standing firm in your own pace and boundaries • accepting waves that arr...