The Cancer Caregiver

When I found myself sad and lonely only 6 months into caregiving, I didn’t realize then that part of me was grieving.  I was grieving  the old me the old way of life the old world I never would be a part of again.  Life for the people around me didn’t change, but the world my husband, daughter, and I lived in changed instantly, without warning.  Grieving is a process we need to be able to go throu...

Do you remember the day you became a caregiver? Most of us didn’t actively decide to become a caregiver. We stepped in because that was what we felt we should naturally do. It was a passive decision.  This episode will help you understand how not being given the opportunity to make an active decision to become a caregiver started you off with a disadvantage and what you can do about it. Download y...

Feeling left out of life is an issue for most of us at some point of us being caregivers. You miss the days when you can plan for vacations. Go out to do something fun on a whim and live a little more spontaneously. However, right now whenever you think about the possibility of getting away in any capacity you feel tethered to your house.  Listen to this episdoe to hear how normal jealousy can be...

Do the seasons pass you by without you noticing them? Do you find yourself in the middle of summer or at the end of the year and not really know how you got there so quickly?  No matter where you ever are in your role as a caregiver it always requires you to do more, remember more, stress out more than you would if you weren’t caring for anyone but yourself.  In this episode, I go over five ways y...

We all crave connection.  We all want to know we aren’t alone in our experiences as caregivers. We’re looking for ways to change our outlook on life.  And We want to be entertained. Listen now to learn how to figure out what your needs are as a caregiver, how to make them a priority in your life, and what the heck this has to do with the Dalai Lama.  Or go directly to what you really need at https...

Finding things that will help you relax a little or take a break from stress and that suit you can be difficult. Because of that, I’d like for you to know that self-care isn’t easy. It’s the most difficult thing to do when you really need it and it takes a certain amount of drive from you to become a reality. So if you wonder why the words self-care cause you to cringe it could possibly be because...

I have a confession to make… When I first became a caregiver I had moments when I actually thought about running away.  Sometimes just a thought is enough to cause a domino effect of emotions.  We all need a place where we feel like we aren’t judged and we can “Confess” the taboo topics we’ve been holding onto all these years. That’s why I created Caregiving Confessions.  Let’s cast aside the guil...

People talk about caregivers like we’re all the same person. When people mention us, especially if they don’t have first-hand experiences as a caregiver or from working with caregivers you get the idea that they think everything for caregivers should be one size fits all.  Listen today to learn how although our needs are similar not any two of the 62 million caregivers in the US are never the same...

Do you know who you really are right now?   When caregivers find it difficult to find ways to enjoy their lives one of the biggest issues I find they have is the fact that even though they know they are caring for someone they haven’t accepted that they aren’t the people they once were.  Listen to Episode 109 “The Clarity That Comes From Accepting vs Just Knowing You're a Caregiver” and begin to f...

Let’s talk about sharing a self care activity with the person you care for.    If you start to do something daily or weekly together that reduces your stress and anxiety as well as theirs you’ll create or strengthen your connection with them. This allows you to have moments together that you’ll be able to look back at and remember. By doing this you’re meeting so many needs both of you have.   You...

Do you suffer from having your caregiver armor on so securely that it’s almost impossible to take it off? Do you have times when you want to just relax but can’t get yourself to do it? When you get stuck in caregiving mode and aren’t able to live your day just as the person you are, you lose the ability to be present and enjoy it.  You miss the smiles and the tears.  You miss the moments when thin...

Do you react in disgust when someone asks you about your plans for the weekend? Whenever I ask a caregiver if they’re going to do anything fun, 9 times out of 10 they react in disgust and say something like “The Weekends are the same as the weekdays” or “How is fun even possible?” Or maybe you’d like to have fun but feel guilty for wanting it or fear you’ll be judged for taking a break from life. ...

There is nothing more irritating than people pissing you off when you’re too tired to make good choices! Responding takes a lot of work. It also takes practice. Most importantly you need to have the energy to respond and that means you have to create opportunities to let go of stress. It feels easier to yell back, confront and stomp away because it actually is physically and mentally easier to do!...

I recently had the opportunity to speak with Tracey Noonan of @dont_call_me_cupcake podcast and @wkdgoodcupcakes about her experience as a caregiver for her parents and father in law. She shares how not one, but both of her parents were diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease and her father-in-law was diagnosed with Stage 4 stomach cancer just a year following her unbelievably successful Shark Tank app...

Caregiver, I see you… You’re tired, lonely, and afraid All you want is to be able to enjoy living with the person you care for instead of dreading life with them each day you wake up. You deserve more! Don’t give up on your life! It is possible to learn how to enjoy it again. Listen to this episode of Love Your Caregiving Life Podcast to hear how. Find more support at www.loveyourcaregivinglife.co...

It’s important to notice when things aren’t working for you instead of doing things the same way over and over again and then they get so burnt out they can’t function anymore. I know caregiving can shift your focus away from your own needs. However, you can’t wait for things to get easier in order to prioritize yourself because prioritizing yourself is what makes it easier.  Listen to episode thi...

What if I told you dates with your spouse are possible even if leaving your house isn’t. I get is caregiving had made your relationship with your spouse… confusing. Do you find yourself lonely even though you're both together in the same house?  You wouldn’t even know how to do anything with them for fun because it feels like it’s been centuries since you have. Yet… you really miss the fun times y...

It doesn’t help you that one day is National Caregiving Day. It doesn’t make your role any easier and it doesn’t make you any happier.  We don’t need a freaking day! We need people to take what we do seriously.  Aren’t you tired of people telling you how important they think caregivers are?  They need to show it. They need to show up! You shouldn’t be happy when people say how important they think...

Want to know why writing yourself a love letter is the best step towards enjoying caregiving?   How just one little act of kindness towards yourself is not selfish. Working on accepting and loving yourself is a good first step towards valuing yourself and making yourself a priority.  Listen to this episode to learn how to write that letter and why it can be one of the most transformational things...

You love the person you care for but when the fear of losing them becomes too intense what do you do? Do you start to pull away or do you find the courage to continue loving them as deeply as you can even though you know losing them will break your heart? Listen to this episode to hear more about loving courageously and how it affects caregivers. Find more caregiving support at www.loveyourcaregiv...

Have you ever taken the time to do something just for you and feel disappointed that it didn’t go the way you had planned? That’s exactly what happened to me. In the end I realized that I can’t expect people to accept that I changed when I became a caregiver and keep myself open to other people changing as well.  Listen to this episode “And Just Like That” My Caregiver Escape was Ruined” to hear w...

Does the phrase “don’t cry over spilled milk” apply to Christmas decorations? Listen to this episode to hear a confession, my feelings about this year and how it isn’t fair for you to eat those caregiving emotions.  Find the Transcripts and more Caregiving Support at www.loveyourcaregivinglife.com

Have you desperately needed some time off from caregiving and finally got to take a night off or a weekend away and found that you didn’t feel better or even a little worse than before? Listen to the episode to learn why a night out or a weekend away won’t make you feel as good about caregiving as you’d expect.  Find the show notes and transcripts at www.loveyourcaregivinglife.com

Call me old school but I love getting letters and cards in the mail. If you’ve never written a love letter to someone you’re missing out. You really have to sit and think about the best way for you to tell another person how you feel about them and why.  Listen to this podcast to learn how writing a love letter will help you to remember how much you love and enjoy the person you care for.  Find sh...

It’s time to look back at how caregiving has been working and not working for you.  I don’t care what time of the year you decide to do it, taking account of the state of your caregiving and the health of your loved one is important for you to do. Listen to the podcast episode to hear the five questions you need to ask yourself and go over to the show notes to read the transcripts and use as a gui...