TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live

Andrew has found an inelegant solution to an inelegant perspiration problem, while Luke continues to struggle with a similar issue. Also, Luke had dinner for the first time in a week last night, and it was good! And he finally re-watched the 1983 Seattle-based documentary Streetwise, and he's happy to report that it stands the test of time. 

After 5 days of fasting, Luke is going to " do something out of hunger tonight: Eating ." He also has an update on his problematic vacuum cleaner, and a listener helps uncover the long lost William S. Burroughs song of Luke's youth.

Luke has gotten a lot of advice about the broken vacuum cleaner that he tried to return to Costco last weekend. Could this advice fix the machine? We'll find out, on today's installment of TBTL! Plus, Jeff Bezos is moving to Florida, and Andrew thinks he knows why. 

TBTL VP of Podcast Operations and T-Shirt Design Jon Sklaroff joins the show to share some of the merch ideas submitted by listeners. Plus, Andrew is anxious about a very big garbage collection day, and Luke is pondering a list of "Dad Rules" he recently received. 

Luke has a new plan to lose a lot of weight quickly, before a big video gig. You're going to hate it, but that's okay! Plus, Seattle chef and TBTL friendo Thierry Rautereah, aka "The Chef in the Hat" has sadly passed away. And New Zealand's "Siren Clubs" are irritating neighbors by blasting Celene Dion at all hours. 

Andrew is befuddled over a false memory involving Burt Reynolds and/or Tom Selleck and/or a chimpanzee and/or an orangutan. And Luke rubs up against the wrong person at a Halloween party. Literally.

Andrew checks in from his hometown of Cleveland, Ohio, where he learns some shocking news about a very formative Arby's location. Meanwhile, Luke had a very "stampy situation" at Costco this weekend, after which he has some regrets. 

Andrew has a quasi-magical story about his grandpa's watch, and a story about a very obnoxious person in an airport security like. He and Luke also discuss whether it's good or bad to rake leaves off your lawn. And Luke is tempted to buy an expensive kitchen device that Andrew is warning him against. 

Luke and Andrew are blown away when they discover what "60% chance of rain" actually means. They also discuss the distressing story (not skyjinx!) of an off-duty pilot trying to shut down a plane's engines mid-flight.   

TBTL Secretary of Operations Jon Sklaroff joins the show to discuss some TBTL business, including a project that he hopes listeners can help with. Plus, Luke finally watched the HBO documentary about Larrimah, Australia, which casts his and Andrew's experience there in a new light.

Luke discovers someone from Andrew's past making waves in online communities. Plus, the music of Creed seems to be popular in more and more professional locker rooms, which is a twist nobody saw coming.

Andrew is testing out some new equipment today, but it's leading to a potentially awkward situation with his neighbor. Luke recalls the time he attempted a risky joke around Joel McHale and Seth MacFarlane. And they dive into some of the juiciest headlines that Entertainment Tonight has to offer.

Andrew is weirdly fascinated by Luke's recent pizza and soda decisions. Plus, the guy who created the world's hottest pepper just created an even hotter pepper, though we're not sure why. 

Andrew went on a real journey today when he found out he is going to have to start paying for a service he's been using for years. Luke went on a much more emotional journey during a conversation with his dad. And Netflix is apparently going to start opening brick and mortar stores or restaurants or something? 

Luke has a new workout regimen, and it's making his legs all wiggly. He and Andrew also discuss the proposal (by Amanda Knox, oddly) that couples should sleep on different sides of the bed every night. 

Tens of Listeners have suggested tens of thousands of possible nicknames for Andrew. He and Luke go through them. Plus, United Airlines is introducing a new boarding system called "WILMA!"

Luke's Huskie fandom almost cost him a window this weekend. Andrew is felled by a random quote in a Seattle Times article. And a listener shares a fascinating story about something discovered in the wall of an old house. 

Luke found some amazing old receipts from the 1930s inside the walls of his house. He's also landed on a pretty out-side-the-box solution for his new front door. It involves Etsy and old nautical supplies.

Luke is on the hunt for a new front door, and it's surprisingly difficult (and surprisingly very relevant to Andrew's interests.) Plus, everyone in France is freaking out about a bedbug infestation that might not really exist. 

Luke had an amazing night last night, organizing his computer files and listening to old radio shows. Obviously, he's treading on Andrew's brand. Plus, it just got much more expensive for Mariners fans to watch games on television, and it's got a lot of people hoppin' mad, including Luke.

New has a new computer, and it came with slew of new sound effects, effectively ushering in a whole new sonic era for TBTL. Luke also assembled his new treadmill last night with much difficulty, only to discover that Nordictrack built a sneaky money-grab into the machine.

Luke is trying to assemble his new treadmill, but it's not going very well. He and Andrew also try to solve some NPR word puzzles, and Andrew's relationship with his new best friend, DartBot, is deepening.

Andrew has a new electronic friend who is going to change the course of his leisurely lifestyle. Plus, Luke is having some elevator issues in New York, but he found a secret hack. 

Jon joins the show again today to regale Luke and Andrew with more stories of competitive eating and to explain the difference between an "eating contest" and a "food challenge." They also discuss which foods they personally think they could eat the most of, if there ever were a TBTL eating contest, which there probably won't be, but maybe someday.  

Luke, Andrew and Jon gather around their various devices, waiting for today's big test of the Emergency Alert System. They also talk about Jon's experience in a wing-eating contest.