Talk, Unleashed

As a morning person I don’t really need coffee to get up to start the day. My eyes open and the engines are on and going. Most of the time, that is. There are those days when waking in the morning can be a struggle. Historically, I’ve just lit a fire under that damn day and made it go go go.  What if I didn’t. What if I paused and took a breath? What if I let the day just be? What if? What if I pu...

As a morning person I don’t really need coffee to get up to start the day. My eyes open and the engines are on and going. Most of the time, that is. There are those days when waking in the morning can be a struggle. Historically, I’ve just lit a fire under that damn day and made it go go go.  What if I didn’t. What if I paused and took a breath? What if I let the day just be? What if? What if I pu...

What if there are no sides? What if there is no other? This what if lies at the heart of the mindset, philosophy and work of this week’s guest, Lynne Sheridan. For three decades, Lynne has been committed to transforming people’s view of the world, of themselves and of others. She’s a sought-after transformational leadership trainer and coach, has a thriving practice working with couples, collabora...

Aren’t acronyms fun? I sure think so, and this one in particular - YATA - is one with which near every person is familiar … though most tend to avoid admitting it. So as usual, I will start by outing myself and admitting it. Sometimes, I am. What does that mean? You’ll just have to listen to this episode to find out what this acronym stands for … and why it relates to the preposterous idea of lone...

It’s not what happens to you. It’s how you choose to view it. That sounds nice, but when life throws a shitstorm at your noggin, it feels impossible. Take that to macro scale, look at what’s happening in the world and it’s pretty easy to say - everything is going to hell in a hand basket and there’s no two ways about that. I call bullshit. To be clear - I’m not suggesting we smack on rose-colored...

After taking a week off for the July 4th holiday, we're back with some swimmingly interesting perspectives. When learning to swim, typically one doesn’t just leap into the deep end right off.  So why is it that we believe that people should just jump in and learn things and not make mistakes? Oh wait, maybe that’s just me. I was this year year’s old when the light bulb blinked on. Being in tha...

It’s one of the most common visuals one hears in guided meditations. The concept of visualizing yourself sitting by a stream, and any time an errant thought pops into your head, to imagine it as a leaf on the stream, and allow it to drift by. It’s a visual I’ve always loved. It’s always worked. Thing is, I never really spent much time by streams. So imagine my surprise when I found myself creeksid...

Though this relates to a specific incident a week or so ago, the troubling truth is that whenever you’re listening to this episode, it’s likely there’s been another incident that had the same result. A thing happened. One group of people celebrated it. Another group of people decried it as travesty, a disgrace.  Both responses are bullshit. Saturated with ego, conditionality and resulting in more...

Jaime Konzelman is the kind of woman whose story will stop you in your tracks. It’s also the kind of story that, at least probably until somewhat recent years, most folks would have avoided telling. I mean, it’s not often that a high-power, deal-making corporate executive admits to having gotten her start as a stripper. She’s not the first woman I’ve met who established a financial foundation and...

When I was 9 years old I convinced one of my neighbors that my mother would allow me to have one of their Guinea Pigs. I brought it home. Needless to say, it didn’t go so well. Had the little guy long enough to name him Cornflake, and then return him. That's the last time I randomly brought home an animal for which I wasn’t properly set up to provide care. So when a guy at a gas station offere...

One of the most irritating things about driving in most American urban and suburban areas is the utter sense of entitlement and disregard for anything even remotely resembling courtesy. Head to Paris or most any city in Europe where complex roundabouts and other traffic control exist, and watch as what seems to be chaos, orchestrates perfectly. It’s because folks know the basics and are minding th...

Driving around in the country you see a lot of times when some woodland creature just didn’t make it across the road. I do my best to not be the person leaving that collateral damage behind me. In this week’s episode - a case of stopping in my tracks - and in the process engaging with someone whose politics and views lay just about as far from mine as possible. Except here’s the thing. We got alon...

Not sure when it happened but at some point doing nice things for people became suspect. You do something for someone and they think you want something. Sad, really. Result is that most folks keep to themselves, don't share when they need help and end up floundering around in this world trying to get shit done. Or take it to the other extreme and become overly dependent on others. That balance...

If you were an 80s kid you recall the whole going out to play after dinner and coming home before the street lights come on thing. You may also recall that most folks’ parents had some sort of whistle or call, a code that said - get your a$$ home. My father has been dead for 24 years. And the other night I heard part of his whistle. In the woods. So obviously that gave me an inspiration for this w...

I’m not sure when it happened but at some point, good healthy competition and the drive for self-improvement and growth became a zero sum game where one person’s success was only valued at the cost of someone else. That the climb to the top became based on climbing over others. As if there’s only one ladder, one mountain. Thing is, there isn’t. We all have our own hurdles to jump and raising it to...

I grew up in a family where I was taught that speaking up and using your voice matters. That having beliefs and standing by them, matters. Today’s world, though, seems saturated with folks who are so focused on doing that, they lock into wherever they are, double down and become very committed to how right they are - and how wrong others are. It was recently that I learned this isn’t taking a stan...

Ah the joy of musical memories. Experiences, thoughts and phrases that trigger some song or another in my head. In the case of this week’s episode, though I reference Kate Smith and the whole “It ain’t over till the fat lady sings” thing, the song I’m really hearing is by Lenny Kravitz. It ain’t over, till it’s over . Either way, the point is this - just because something *seems* settled, just bec...

This is a very special episode. Both because I diverge from my usual format and because of the incredible guest whose wisdom you get to experience. Her name is Lisa Kalmin and she is among the elite in the world of Transformational Leadership. In this wide ranging conversation, Lisa shares how she came to the world of Transformational Leadership, and why a specific part of the process is so meanin...

It’s one of the key moments in the movie The Matrix. That moment when Neo chooses the “red pill”. Now if you haven’t seen the movie, that makes no sense. So if that’s the case, here’s a metaphor that might work - the idea that you cannot un-bake a cake, cannot un-ring a bell. Once a thing is seen or known, it cannot be otherwise. What on earth does that have to do with this week’s episode of the p...

When you’re learning to walk, no one berates you for falling down. Somehow, once we get older, falling down is seen as humiliation. Embarrassment. And that applies whether that falling down is literal or figurative. Last thing you want to do is make a mistake, fall down. Problem is, we all do it, and so having shame around it doesn’t really serve. What might it look like if we could embrace the fa...

We’re taught to listen to authority. Kids learn to ask “Why?” and parents respond “Because I said so.” Over time, we question, query and dig underneath. Today’s culture - saturated by psychotherapy and coaches - encourages people to ask “What’s underneath that?” Questioning and digging underneath every action’s motivation. It’s exhausting. It’s also often a waste of time. There’s also a very real...

When I heard Kara Swisher was writing her memoir, Burn Book , I couldn’t wait. Besides being one of - if not the - most influential Journalists covering Silicon Valley and tech at the rise of the Internet Age, she’s a stupendous writer, and is never one to shy away from calling bullsh*t.   Admission - at this recording I've only read the introduction. Mostly because it’s already clearly a page...

When you think about balance, what comes up for you? Do you go immediately to the ever-present impossible expectation of life/work balance? If so, this episode is absolutely for you. It’s about a terrifying experience I had with literal balance that made me take a good, hard look at just how out of what my internal balance was. And more importantly the fact that I’d had tons of warning signs that...

Where do YOU belong? Where is the place you just fit , no matter what? The whole idea of “home is where the heart is” has such value - and it’s not just about the heart. Those online “quizzes” that ask the question - “where would YOU prefer to live?” With images of mountains, the desert, forest, beach and cities - implying that the choice determines what kind of person you are (along with images o...

This week, inspired by a quote from Eleanor Roosevelt, I ponder the value that society places on one of the most toxic behaviors around communication - gossip. Let’s be clear - we all have done or do it. Everyone. So let’s take a deep breath. The person who truly and honestly NEVER does is a rare creature indeed. It’s not new behavior - people have talked about others probably since we started tal...