Sum On Sleeve Podcast

It's normal to tell our kids what to do. It's part of being a parent. We start off as dictators, then as teachers and instructors, then as guides, mentors and peers. If we stay in one role forever, we'll never learn to let go and allow our kids to be the teachers and guides the world needs. Don't put your finger in the electrical outlet. ⁣ Don't forget to wash your hands⁣ Brush your teeth⁣ Do your...

Sorry for talking about my successes Sorry for almost bumping into you Sorry for gossiping about you Sorry for being a toxic friend Why do we apologize when we haven't done anything wrong but when we have, our egos get in the way and we forget those words? Saying sorry needs to be meaningful. When we keep saying it for the wrong reasons, it loses the effect it has on people to forgive.⁣ ⁣ When's t...

What does security mean to me?  When someone is secure with themselves, they'll exhibit these 6 signs. These are behaviours that I am currently striving for and I hope they'll inspire you to think deeply about.  It's hard for anyone to be completely secure with themselves but once we know what to aim for, it's easier to set goals, create plans and develop habits to change. We can overcom...

When you see someone who is "uglier", "fatter", "dumber" and/or "less talented" than you, doing what you want to do...do you think, "I can do better." Go do it! Only those who can prove themselves are actually better.  Are you in the audience booing, whining, and complaining?⁣ ⁣ Or are you centre stage, performing, being vulnerable and REALLY showing the world your authentic self?⁣ ⁣ Get raw,...

I just learned about sensory seeking versus sensory sensitive. I have a bit of both but more on the sensory seeking side. I hate wearing shoes, don't notice when I my clothes are disheveled, aren't too bothered by smells. But I hate loud noises. What about you? This was something that came across my social media feeds and it's for parents who are trying to understand their kids.⁣ However, I also f...

I cringe at the thought of telling my parents about my mental health issues...but I can easily tweet to the world about my history of depression and disordered eating.⁣ Strangers allow us to have fleeting moments to be bold. But we need to show vulnerability in the relationships that we value in order for us to build lasting courage. We’ve become so insecure about our flaws that the fear of judgem...

Whether you're deciding to switch jobs, start your life with someone, move across the country...You will only experience one choice. Think of the decisions you've made in the past and how each of them led to something else.⁣ ⁣Then make a decision. There are no right or wrong life decisions...regret is for those who can't learn from the past.⁣ During life changes like getting married, getting divor...

⁣I don't want to see my kids struggle bc every negative feeling they feel, I feel it 10x more. ⁣ But letting them face the big, ugly world will allow me to also feel their sense of accomplishment and joy 100x more. ⁣ And this difference gives me courage to let go. Push...pull...push...pull⁣ You want them to grow up but you also want them to stay the same.⁣ Parenthood is a funny thing. You can't li...

Let’s get comfortable talking about our vaginas, breaking through taboos and redefining how we think about women’s health Vagina. Kegels. Vulva. Clitoris. Labia. Female genitalia. How do you feel when you hear these words? Skirmish? Icky? Giggly? Growing up as an Asian Canadian Growing up as an Asian Canadian, talking about vaginas wasn’t exactly a dinner table topic. It was a word used in te...

What do new moms really need to hear during those first months with their newborns? When a baby is born, a mother is also born. Some people may not realize this because all they focus on is the baby. We can’t blame them since babies are the epitome of joy. They symbolize hope, purity, faith, innocence, the future and all the gooey stuff in between. Their adorable little cheeks, tiny little fingers...

Some decisions are hard to make and some are easy. Making a decision like, “Where do you want to go for dinner?” may be easy for someone and hard for someone else. When I was in my early 20’s, some of the simplest decisions would stress me out. There were days when I couldn’t decide if I should wear blue, black or gray pants because I honestly thought wearing the wrong colour would ruin my day. De...

I have a full-time day job. I’m a mom. I’m a blogger. I have a lot of things going on.  It can be overwhelming and almost every month, I reach a breaking point. But somehow, I manage to get myself together, patch up those loose seams and carry on. Last summer, I became fed up with that cycle so I asked myself, “What can I do to minimize the build-up so that the breaking points don’t happen?”...

Does the word therapy still relate to"crazy people"? Like, "Wow, there must be something seriously wrong with you!"   When I was growing up, the idea of getting help for your mental health was rarely talked about. And when it was discussed, it was usually about a Hong Kong celebrity going to rehab. I'm an Asian mom and I do therapy.  Here are my 3 aha moments/lessons learned during my fi...

It's easy to go through the motions of life. The sun rises. The sun sets. Another day. Another night. Rinse and repeat.⁣ ⁣ I'm guilty of this. There's just so much to do every day. But instead of measuring our productivity and effectiveness by the number of tasks we've completed, let's measure it by how we are, how we feel, how we present instead⁣. So instead of to-do lists, you should create this...

What do you do when you have an issue with someone? Sometimes, it's hard to decide what to do. In this video, I share with you the 4 options you can take when you experience interpersonal conflict. 2 options involve the other person and 2 options involve yourself only. 1. Fight: Have an open and honest discussion with the other person. 2. Flight: Cut the person out of your life. 3. Passive aggress...

We all have the same 24 hours in a day.⁣ ⁣ What you do with those hours and how you prioritize your time make the difference between someone who gets sh*t done and someone who doesn't do sh*t.⁣ ⁣ Which one are you?⁣ Tag someone who can relate to this⁣ Did you find this helpful? Let me know in the comments below :) https://www.sumonsleeve.com Sign up for free Self-improvement downloads: https://bit...

Growing up, I was the nerdy, Asian kid who studied on Friday nights, went to Chinese school on Saturday mornings, practiced piano every day after school.⁣ ⁣ I was on a mission. ⁣ ⁣ Yeah, it sucked not getting invited to parties, not being popular, getting teased for wearing hand me downs, having to play by myself during recess or lunch when my only friend was away or sick. ⁣ ⁣HOWEVER, I'm grateful...

As an introvert, I enjoy silence (or some light jazz), being by myself with my thoughts, working alone and one on one conversations.⁣ ⁣ But when I'm in a group, I've noticed that when conversations lull, I'll try to think of something to ask or talk about. ⁣ ⁣ Why do I do it? What's wrong with silence?⁣ ⁣ This year, I'm going to work on being more myself in social situations. I enjoy silence by my...

When you see someone you perceive is struggling...how do you feel?⁣ ⁣ It's a natural instinct to offer help. We don't want to watch others suffer. ⁣ ⁣ From offering unsolicited advice, money, visiting without being asked etc...if the person receiving it refuses, how do you feel? Tag someone who can relate to this⁣ Did you find this helpful? Let me know in the comments below :) https://www.sumonsle...

Do you ever feel like a warm body at your parents whenever you go see them? Relationship building with our Asian parents is tough When you have high expectations...you risk feeling disappointed for not getting what you put in. When you have low expectations...you risk feeling guilty for not doing enough. How can we feel neither disappointed nor guilty? Tag someone who can relate to this⁣ Did you f...

You like pizza more than pasta?⁣ ⁣ I hate you and I'm never going to understand you.⁣ ⁣ OK so there are obviously bigger issues people disagree on. But if we all treated them like a pizza versus pasta conversation, how would that change society?⁣ ⁣ Maybe we'd realize why pizza is so important to them enough to develop empathy?⁣ Tag someone who can relate to this⁣ Did you find this helpful? Let me...

Here is a truth about humans: those who are hard on others are harder on themselves. Ever met someone who is never impressed, constantly disappointed in others and sets unattainable expectations?⁣ ⁣ They look for flaws before beauty.⁣ They look for what went wrong before what went right.⁣ ⁣ It's not personal. They do that to themselves every day. Don't let their negative paradigm affect what you s...

When I'm not in a good mood, my appearance reflects that. Making myself look presentable isn't actually for other people. It's for myself.⁣ ⁣ The other day, my daughter was watching me put mascara on and asked me why I was doing it. ⁣ ⁣ Instead of telling her it's because it makes my eyes bigger or prettier or more awake looking...⁣ ⁣ I told her, I enjoy putting it on like it's art...just like whe...

If all fleeps are flops and all flops are flips...are all fleeps flips?⁣ ⁣ Oh god I always hated those IQ test questions⁣ ⁣ Dichotomy, yes or no, good or bad, black or white.⁣ ⁣ Are we computers or robots? I thought we were humans.⁣ ⁣ Being open-minded comes with experience but only if you don't view those experiences as a one size fits all.⁣ ⁣ Lost a fortune investing in stocks? Got your heartbro...

From baby boomers to Generations x, y, z. The older generations think millennials need to stop getting so offended so easily. Millennials think the older generations need to open up and stop holding things in. No matter what age, gender, socioeconomic status someone is, there will always be differences in opinions.  How can we find the balance between getting too offended and not getting offe...