Scarred Not Silent: Stories from the intersections of survival

Sometimes, the only way to face today is to imagine the voice of tomorrow. In this episode, I take a step into the future—five years post-transplant—and reflect on what that version of myself might say about resilience, patience, and faith. By listening to the wisdom of tomorrow, we can find the courage to endure today. As you listen, I’ll invite you into a grounding practice: writing a short note...

 In this episode, I open up about my search for faith in the midst of life’s hardest seasons. With the backdrop of war and devastation in the Middle East reminding us of how fragile the world can be, I share the story of the religion that finally spoke to my spirit. This isn’t about pushing beliefs—it’s about finding the higher power that gives you strength. I invite you to reflect, wrestle, and r...

 In this episode, I share a pivotal moment in my transplant journey—finally being invited to orientation. The transplant team laid out the possibilities and the risks, reminding me that this path is far from a cake walk. A transplant brings the hope of a new life, but it also comes with real dangers, including the possibility of death. Still, we push forward for the chance to live again. I walk th...

Today’s episode draws on the grit and determination shown in the Canelo vs. Crawford championship boxing fight. While Crawford’s skills carried him far, his resilience—the ability to keep getting back up, to walk through setbacks, and to prepare for this moment—ultimately made the difference. Connection to Kidney Journeys: That same resilience mirrors the warrior spirit found in kidney patients an...

 This week, I share how we are adjusting to life in our new apartment in North Park. Our home had fallen behind on payments, which forced us to make a difficult decision. The adult children chose different paths. At the same time, my health has remained steady, and transplant testing may be closer than I imagined. Join me for an honest look at the choices that shape family, the resilience to start...

 Positive reinforcement is not fluffy talk. It is the classic fuel that helps purpose take root. In this episode, I unpack how praise, cues, and small rewards shape who we become. I share why some people who feel “purposeless” may simply be missing steady reinforcement, not missing potential.   I also discuss my goal to compete in shot put at the Transplant Games. Once upon a time, I was a high sc...

 In this episode, I share how I lost over 45 pounds in just four months, without a gym membership or fancy routine, just by walking to get groceries. I open up about how dialysis reshaped the way I ate, bringing both discipline and unexpected challenges. While many things started to fall into place, I still faced the uphill battle of managing three serious health conditions that made stability har...

 Rent due, savings thin, and one meeting that could keep a roof over us. We put on our best clothes, made our case to a property owner, and I started a simple weight-loss plan: carrying groceries. We dodged homelessness, but did the plan work? Press play for the moment of truth and the lessons that stayed.  Send us Fan Mail Support the show  Thanks for tuning in to Scarred Not Silent: Stories from...

 Purpose is not a one-ticket ride. Even on dialysis, you can carry many callings and move forward.  Send us Fan Mail Support the show  Thanks for tuning in to Scarred Not Silent: Stories from the Intersection of Survival. Stay connected: www.scarrednotsilent.com | scarrednotsilent@gmail.com | Support the show by leaving a review!  Oh! If you would like to support my coffee or cheesburger fund, che...

This week, I pause to honor my family as we grieve the passing of my uncle. At the same time, I continue to process my own recent job loss, a weight that has tested my identity and my faith. Yet, in the middle of loss, an unexpected gift appeared. Through my wife’s persistence, I decided to begin applying for SSDI. What surprised me most was the decision and the walk to the office. Each step gave...

 At home, I caught myself picturing the ocean as an off switch for the noise in my head. I did not go. I only imagined the hush underwater, knowing even the thought could be misunderstood. What I really wanted was stillness long enough to face what I have avoided: the truth about homelessness, my own selfishness, and the question of what now. In this episode, I unpack that moment, the clarity it s...

 Two weeks came and went. The pressure eased, but the weight did not. I clocked out, yet the stress stayed clocked in. I was still carrying regret, second-guessing every step, and life felt a little darker each day.  Send us Fan Mail Support the show  Thanks for tuning in to Scarred Not Silent: Stories from the Intersection of Survival. Stay connected: www.scarrednotsilent.com | scarrednotsilent@g...

In this episode, Rodney Washington candidly discusses the relentless pressures of working in social services and the impact on his health. Despite facing anxiety, pneumonia, and the stress of managing discharges without support, Rodney reveals how he navigated these challenges without truly coping. As he confronts the decision to resign and the looming uncertainty of his future, his story serves a...

 Moving to San Diego for a coveted job felt like the next logical step, but nothing prepared me for the frosty reception that awaited. In this episode, I share my first days on the job and how I learned that my assistant had been eyeing the same role for years. Because she didn’t hold a degree, she’d been passed over repeatedly, and my arrival reignited old wounds. I threw myself into the work, lo...

  Sometimes the most powerful conversations are the ones you can’t share, but the lessons still deserve to be told.   In this unscheduled edition of Scarred Not Silent , I reflect on an unexpected meeting with my kidney donor. He reached out for guidance on improving communication in his volunteer work with Kidneys for Communities. While the details of our talk will stay private, the insight I wal...

 After surviving what can only be described as the “Airbnb Olympics of Chaos,” I finally touched down in a new neighborhood that feels like a Beach Boys remix— Yes, even the White folks said hi… at night… in California. 😳 The journey was equal parts exhausting and enlightening. But despite the drama, the stress, and late nights, I'm still standing. Yeah... yeah... yeah!  Send us Fan Mail Sup...

 In this raw and reflective episode, I take you inside my move to San Diego. It was a journey filled with hope, struggle, and the constant drag of medical equipment through Airbnbs and high-rise elevators. What started as a fresh chapter slowly gave way to doubt and fatigue. The move initially felt like the right decision, but reality started asking hard questions. And we haven’t even talked about...

 In the final episode of Season 1, I share the surprising pivot that led me from the familiar comfort of Arizona to what felt like a second home — San Diego, California. From the jaw-dropping moment of being offered more money than expected to my wife’s bold plan of hopping Airbnbs until we were settled, I reflect on the hopeful start of a new chapter. But as you'll hear, chasing the "mi...

In this raw and revealing episode, I share the emotional aftermath of discovering I was never placed on the transplant list in Tucson. From the initial shock to the silent scrutiny that followed, this story uncovers the mental toll of unanswered questions and the quiet battles many patients face behind closed doors. This isn’t just about medical systems—it’s about resilience, truth, and the unseen...

In this raw and personal episode, I unpack one of my biggest pet peeves: when patients reject medical advice, deny treatment options, or lash out at healthcare professionals—only to face the fallout later. We’ll talk about how patient self-determination, while a vital right, can sometimes lead to devastating consequences like being removed from the transplant list or increasing life-threatening co...

 In this episode, Rodney breaks down his method— OPA: Observation, Process, Action —a simple, powerful approach for navigating kidney disease. Born out of lived experience, OPA helps listeners tune into their bodies , make sense of their journey , and take necessary steps . Whether you’re newly diagnosed, living with chronic kidney disease, or supporting a loved one, this method gives you a mindse...

Join me as I share my personal journey of craving and consuming paper, flour, and yes, even baby powder. Call it fine dining for the nutritionally challenged. This unusual menu is rooted in iron deficiency and a condition called pica. Together, we will break the silence around these cravings, explore the medical reasons behind them, and talk about real solutions. If you have ever wondered why some...

 This episode shares the day peritonitis had me truly down and out. I talk about the pain, the fear, and finding moments to chuckle at my own misery, because sometimes laughing is the only thing that doesn’t hurt too much. For anyone who knows that healing needs both grit and a little humor.  Send us Fan Mail Support the show  Thanks for tuning in to Scarred Not Silent: Stories from the Intersecti...

 I used to burn with embarrassment over the tubes and the scars, the roadmap of survival carved into my skin. It is hard, truly hard, not to care about the eyes that linger too long, judging what they do not understand. Some days I want to hide it all away. Other days I fight to stand tall, daring them to look and teaching myself not to give a damn.  Send us Fan Mail Support the show  Thanks for t...

 Who says dialysis has to keep you homebound? With planning, teamwork, and humor (even when someone steps in the bucket!), you can see the world, one exchange at a time.  Send us Fan Mail Support the show  Thanks for tuning in to Scarred Not Silent: Stories from the Intersection of Survival. Stay connected: www.scarrednotsilent.com | scarrednotsilent@gmail.com | Support the show by leaving a revie...