Say The Things

Understanding you need boundaries? Fine. Setting them? Different story. This week we're getting practical—I'm walking you through exactly how to set boundaries, what to say, how to hold them when people push back, and what happens when you start protecting your time, energy, and peace. Spoiler: it gets worse before it gets better. When you set a boundary, people are going to test it, question it,...

The uncomfortable truth is when you change your values, the people who benefited from the old ones resist. This week we're talking about boundaries and the messy, guilt-inducing, relationship-testing reality of them. I've struggled most with boundaries around my time and energy—the assumption that because I'm home, my time is everyone's time. But being home doesn't mean being available. Your time...

You can do all the deep work—understand your should storms, clarify your values, honor your seasons—but on a random Wednesday when the old patterns come screaming back, you need something you can reach for quickly. This week I'm sharing the mantras that ground me when I feel stuck or out of control, and how to create your own that actually work. These aren't stolen from Pinterest or forced affirma...

I used to think something was wrong with me when I couldn't keep up with other moms who seemed to be thriving while I was barely making it to bedtime. Looking back, nothing was wrong—I was just in an emotional winter while they were in summer. This week I'm sharing the four emotional seasons we all cycle through and why your capacity to live your values changes depending on which season you're in....

This week, we're choosing what comes next—your actual values, not the ones you inherited. I'm sharing the moment my therapist asked what values I wanted to bring to parenting and I sat there, speechless, realizing I'd been operating from survival instead of intention. We're examining the heavy list of values we downloaded from the 80s and 90s—perfectionism, productivity as worthiness, self-sacrifi...

This week I'm naming something I think we've all felt but rarely talk about: the should storm. You know that voice that tells you you're failing at everything while you're just trying to make dinner? I'm walking you through where these thoughts actually come from, why they feel so loud, and a step-by-step process to quiet them. We're getting curious about the beliefs we inherited without choosing...

I'm kicking off a new series about letting go to uncover who we really are, inspired by John Acuff's Greatest Year Ever course. Just like the trees in fall draw their energy inward and release what no longer serves them, we need to learn to bring our energy back inside and use it with wisdom—not to meet everyone else's needs, but to sustain a healthy life. I've been questioning how our generation...

Repair is the most skipped step in conflict work, and I've had to do a lot of it with my daughter after years of being too quick, too certain, and too afraid to be vulnerable. Today, I'm breaking down the four components of genuine repair—and why "I'm sorry, but..." will never rebuild what you've broken. This isn't a one-and-done process, and your timeline isn't their timeline—but every time you c...

Last Tuesday, my daughter came home frustrated and every instinct told me to fix it, control it, be right about it—but I paused and asked her what she thought her options were instead. This week, I'm sharing the specific questions that rewire how conflict happens: what to ask yourself before walking into hard conversations, how to stay present during them, and the reflection work that creates last...

Turns out, you can't think your way out of a fight-or-flight response—and that's why willpower alone never fixes how we show up in conflict. I'm walking you through what happens in your body during an argument, why my shift from fight to freeze confused my daughter's nervous system, and the practical tools that actually work to regulate yourself before, during, and after conflict. This is where we...

I used to be lightning-fast with my words—shutting down arguments before anyone could respond, winning every fight while losing connection. This week, we're getting honest about what we bring to conflict that makes it worse: unprocessed anger, the need to be right, defensiveness, or the ways we disguise control as care. If you're ready to stop having the same fight on different days, this episode...

Most of us are grinding through life, dismissing the whispers of our body and our relationships because we don't have time to pause. But what if the noise we're taught to manage is actually news—information our lives are desperately trying to send us? I'm breaking down five concrete practices (that won't add to your plate) to help you shift from managing to listening, including nervous system regu...

A few weeks ago, I did an exercise that completely changed how I see control—and honestly, it pissed me off before it set me free. I drew a circle and listed what I actually control inside it and what I don't outside it, and the truth was brutal: I've been spending most of my energy trying to manage things that were never mine to hold. Today I'm walking you through this exercise and the new soundt...

Research shows that trees don't compete for sunlight – they share resources through an underground network, warning each other of dangers and supporting the whole forest's health. I'm exploring how we can shift from competition to collaboration in our relationships, especially when social media makes comparison so tempting. Your community network is probably more abundant than you realize, and it'...

In a world where we're constantly fed opinions disguised as facts, I'm sharing the three simple questions that transformed how I process information. We'll explore why being "nice" sometimes means having uncomfortable conversations about truth, and how to navigate conflicting information without losing your sanity. I challenge you to apply these questions to something you encounter this week – bec...

I took an extended summer break and found myself not in the right headspace to return, which got me thinking about the energy we bring into the world. With all the negativity and chaos happening around us—from political unrest to violence—I want to ask: what energy are you contributing? I believe we are literally energetic beings operating at measurable frequencies, and there's science behind how...

I'm exploring the connection between self-advocacy and self-silencing as I head into a break because I'm experiencing burnout myself, which feels perfectly timed for this topic. I challenge you to think about how we constantly tell our kids to advocate for themselves while we struggle to do the same, often because we've been conditioned to believe that self-advocacy is selfish when we're supposed...

I explore why women negotiate as often as men but succeed only half as often, and how we've been taught to negotiate like men when we should be leveraging our natural relationship-building strengths instead. I share a four-step framework specifically designed for women: reviewing past performance, understanding future vision, making the ask, and ending with collaborative questions that invite othe...

In today's episode, I explored how women can move beyond stereotypical emotional expression by developing emotional intelligence and expanding our emotional vocabulary beyond the mere 20 words most Americans use out of 3,000 available emotion-describing words. I discussed how emotions naturally last only six seconds unless we suppress them, and shared practical strategies like practicing the pause...

I'm breaking down the ridiculous stereotypes we've been handed about women in conflict – from the "hysterical female" to the "peacekeeper at all costs" – and why these scripts are keeping us small. The research is clear: healthy relationships actually have conflict 20% of the time, and 80% of disagreements aren't meant to be "solved" but understood, which means we need to stop treating conflict li...

In this episode, I'm tackling the impossible position women face in professional settings—we're either seen as competent and cold or likable but unskilled, and honestly, I'm tired of having to choose between these limiting options. I dive into how we undermine our own authority through the words we choose and share practical strategies for speaking with confidence. Your expertise didn't accidental...

In this episode, I'm getting vulnerable about my struggle with boundaries, especially with my kids. I share the belief I've been operating under which has led me straight into burnout and resentment territory.   I walk through my three-step process for setting clear limits and remind you that when people who've benefited from your lack of boundaries suddenly get challenged by your new ones, that's...

In this episode, I challenge everything you think you know about assertive communication - it's not about being aggressive or demanding, but about being authentically you through honest, direct, respectful, and appropriate communication. I explore how women especially have been conditioned to prioritize being "kind and soft" over speaking truthfully, and why the people who benefit from us staying...

Welcome to my new summer series where I'm examining the complex reality of communication as a woman and how we can move beyond limiting social expectations. Despite being raised by women who fought for equality and told we could become anything, we weren't prepared for the challenges we actually face - like being perceived as dominating when we speak just 30% of the time or being interrupted twice...

In this episode, I dive into the exhausting reality of co-parenting with a covert narcissist, sharing real examples from my own experience that will sound painfully familiar to anyone in this situation. I break down four key traits that make co-parenting feel impossible: blame shifting, ruining special occasions, chronic unreliability, and weaponizing children's emotions. Through personal stories—...