Saturday Night Freak Show

Holly is startled to discover that Santa Claus is actually the son of Satan in Santa's Slay (2005), a horror-comedy starring WWE's Bill Goldberg as rampaging demon, recently released from 1000 years of jolly servitude, on account of losing a bet with an angel. Unleashed upon the small town of Hell, MI, St. Nick murders everyone on his naughty list while a pair of love-struck teens and an old man t...

Sean wants to build a snowman, but is horrified when it becomes a serial killer named Jack Frost (1997)! When the aforementioned (human) bad guy gets bathed in "genetic chemicals" in an auto accident, he dissolves into the snow and rises again as a homicidal, ambulatory snowman, who vows revenge on the sheriff of Snomonton, CO, who put him away. Listen as we suffer through this cheap (but earnest)...

Travis wonders what it would be like to live in Cool World (1992), renegade animator Ralph Bakshi's trippy live-action/animation answer to Who Framed Roger Rabbit? Voluptuous doodle Holli Would (Kim Basinger) wants to get out of her animated, 2D world and escape to the "real" world; to do so, she seduces comic book artist Jack Deebs (Gabriel Byrne), while cop Brad Pitt worries the sex between "doo...

Colin explores forbidden love among the Cat People (1982), which stars Nastassja Kinski as a woman who begins to fear that her burgeoning sexuality, once unleashed, may literally turn her into an animal. John Hurt becomes obsessed with her mysterious femininity, while Malcolm McDowell plays her skeevy brother, who proposes an unwholesome solution to her predicament. Listen as we discuss the career...

Holly thinks The Stepford Wives (1975) are acting strangely, and is afraid she might become one herself! Based on Ira (Rosemary's Baby) Levin's novel, a New York City housewife moves to an idyllic bedroom community where all of the women are "perfect" homemakers; she begins to suspect that an insidious mind control conspiracy is afoot and that sooner or later, she will be forced to become one of t...

Sean revs up his chainsaw and develops a taste for Southern barbecue with Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation (aka The Return of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, (1994). A virtual remake of the original 1974 classic, Next Generation finds future star Renee Zellweger and a gang of high schoolers ducking out on their prom, going off into the boonies, and running afoul of another future star, Ma...

Travis brings us back From Beyond the Grave (1973), an anthology of horror short stories from England's Amicus Productions. Peter Cushing stars as the proprietor of a antiques shop that sells haunted items; David Warner, Donald Pleasance, Ian Ogilvy and others come to possess the items and subsequently feature in stories about haunted mirrors, stolen valor, demonic possession, and phantom rooms. L...

Colin summons the king of vampires with a viewing of Dracula (1979), Universal Pictures' big budget remake of the Bela Lugosi classic, this time with Frank Langella reprising his Broadway role as the vampire count. Moving from Transylvania to England, the suave bloodsucker integrates himself into high society and begins seducing the womenfolk and corrupting them into wanton creatures of the night!...

Holly dares us to unlock the mysteries of The Cabin in the Woods (2012), a Joss Whedon-written, Drew Goddard-directed, meta-movie dissertation on the inner-workings of horror films. Five college students head to the titular vacation spot and become the targets of a zombie redneck torture family; what they don't know is that all the death and mayhem is choreographed from a secret underground govern...

Sean likes his women sexy, cold, pierced and punctured, as evidenced by his choice of Return of the Living Dead 3 (1993), which adds amore to the zombie saga. Star-crossed lovers Curt and Julie become entangled in a secret government project after she dies and he resurrects her as a zombie; she begins piercing her body with sharp instruments in order to feel human as her appetites for human brains...

Travis encounters The Bad Seed (1956) and contends that some people are just born evil. Plus: we discover his Top 10 favorite horror movies in our special Halloween segment! Affluent Christine Penmark enters a parental nightmare as evidence stacks up that suggests her pretty, perfect 8-year-old daughter Rhoda may, in fact, be a serial killer. Listen as we analyze one of cinema's first stabs at exa...

On the eve of the premiere of a new HBO series, Colin takes us on a vacation to the original Westworld (1973) and we end up on the run from killer robots! Wealthy vacationers visit a Western-themed amusement park when an unexplained malfunction causes the previously benign humanoid robots, who populate the park, to go on a homicidal rampage. Listen as we dig deep into the the perils of virtual rea...

Holly wants to see What We Do in the Shadows (2014) and spies on the nocturnal habits of a group of New Zealand vampires who share a house together, thanks to a documentary camera crew who is allowed to follow the flatmates around as they prepare for an annual vampire party, called the Unholy Masquerade. Listen in as we talk about vampire movies, movie character arcs done right, the appeal of mock...

Sean picks up some Street Trash (1987) and discovers it's not what he thought it was! Described as a movie about NYC winos who melt after drinking toxic booze, the Internet Radio Superstars inadvertently sit through a Troma-esque riff on hobo culture, which includes homicidal Vietnam veterans, hipster hobos, necrophiliac junkyard managers, sexual deviancy, and a game of Keep-A-Way involving a seve...

Travis wanted to join a fraternity, but ended up in a Dude Bro Party Massacre III (2015)! In this psychedelic slasher parody (the title of which is part of the joke: there is no Dude Bro Party Massacre 1 or 2), a masked killer known as Motherface preys on the jocks, dudes and bros of the Delta Bi Theta fraternity, while the twin brother of a former victim tries to infiltrate the order to get reven...

Colin wants to be part of The Monster Squad (1987), a group of monster-lovin' kids who become the only hope for civilization after Dracula, Frankenstein's Monster, The Wolf Man, The Mummy and The Gill Man all arrive in town, in search of a powerful talisman that can alter the balance of good and evil. Listen in as we find out about ruptured wolfman nards, indulge our love of movie monsters and rea...

Sean discovers what lurks in the basement dungeon with Castle Freak (1995). The Re-Animator/From Beyond team of director Stuart Gordon, producer Charles Band, and stars Jeffrey Combs and Barbara Crampton bring us yet another loose adaptation of an H.P. Lovecraft story, as an American family inherits an Italian castle (producer Band's real house!) with a dark secret - in the form of a misshapen, se...

Travis opens the door to House (1986) and finds monsters inside! In this cult horror-comedy, a writer moves into a big Victorian house following the disappearance of his son, and begins to experience strange hallucinations and phenomena, including slimy monsters that burst out of closets and medicine cabinets! Come back with us to a time when horror movies were fun, as we revist this oft-overlooke...

Colin digs up Dan O'Bannon's H.P. Lovecraft adaptation The Resurrected (1992 - aka Shatterbrain aka The Ancestor), based on "The Case of Charles Dexter Ward". A beautiful woman hires a private investigator (24's John Terry) to find out what's gone wrong with her scientist husband (Chris Sarandon), stumbling onto a centuries-old conspiracy involving a 1770's warlock and black magic. Listen as we ta...

Holly loves unicorns...and Tom Cruise, and Legend (1985), director Ridley Scott's visually arresting fairy tale-fantasy epic, in which a young forest lad (Cruise) must rescue a princess (Mia Sara) and a unicorn from the clutches of the Lord of Darkness (Tim Curry in an awesome Rob Bottin makeup design). Listen in as we detail the differences between the U.S. theatrical version and the internationa...

Sean says bustin' makes him feel good with his pick of Ghostbusters II (1989). Five years after the 1984 classic, the out-of-work Ghostbusters are forced back into action to deal with an epidemic of psychoactive slime flooding the sewers of NYC, an evil painting possessed by an ancient sorcerer, and, most horrifying of all, Venkman's old flame now has a baby. Join us as we tunnel through the nosta...

Travis goes to bat for Superman III (1983), in which someone thought it would be a good idea to put Richard Pryor and Superman together for the Man of Steel's third big screen showdown. In this sequel, Superman faces off against a gifted computer hacker, an evil tycoon, and - wouldn't you know it - a Super Computer that may be able to destroy the Son of Krypton once and for all! Listen as we talk...

Colin dares to go back in the water for Jaws 3-D (1983), and finds that the third dimension is terror! Florida's SeaWorld is about to open an new underwater attraction when a giant, 35-foot great white shark swims in through an open sea gate and terrorizes the visitors on opening day. Dennis Quaid, as the son of Amity police Chief Brody, runs around trying to save the guests and his relationship w...

Sean summons Ghoulies II (1988) and they nearly get him in the end...again! This sequel adventure finds the diminutive Gremlins/Critters ripoffs (from Charles Band's Empire Pictures) hiding out in a travelling carnival's spook house, where they wreak all sorts of havoc, mischief and murder until a plucky carny, his drunken uncle, a leggy harem dancer, and a profit-conscious businessman, get wise a...

Travis once again transforms into a Japanese superhero character in Guyver: Dark Hero (1994). Having defeated the evil monster Zoanoids, our hero Sean Barker (Metal Gear Solid's David Hayter) takes his psychic space armor and travels to a cave in Utah, where an archaeological dig may unearth answers about the Guyver Unit's mysterious origins. Will he find love? Will he uncover another insidious Zo...