ResponseABLE Parenting

Empathy is SO hard and it's definitely not our go to parenting tool. But it is a critical step! When we lead with empathy our children begin to trust their sensations, the begin to understand their feelings and they begin to develop a secure sense of Self. Empathy is the pathway to self esteem. When we show our child that they are worthy enough to be listened to, seen, and that we want to understa...

In this episode I share my feelings around a quote that truly struck me. I cannot for the life of me remember which podcast I was listening to that shared it but I do remember stopping in my tracks, rewinding and typing it down!  Here is the quote: Everything we want in our homes and lives is on the other side of the feelings we think we can't feel. The actual line between where we are and where w...

When you are in the thick of a tantrum it can feel excruciating. And it can feel like it's never going to end. In this episode I share a story of losing my cool with my 3 year old. And how my response totally shifted his body - and not in a good way. I share openly and vulnerability about this moment in time and all of my takeaways from it. Tantrums and meltdowns are one of the hardest parts of pa...

In this episode I share a story of trying to teach my son a lesson and how poorly it went! And the reason it went so poorly was because my timing was completely off. I was trying to teach the lesson while he was still dysregulated and so he truly wasn't grasping or hearing a word I was saying. He was internalizing it as shame, being bad and that he wasn't a good kid. I also talk about generational...

In this episode I share one of "ah-ha" moments with my son. Once I had this mental reframe I was able to look at him with so much more curiosity and wonder vs. frustration and confusion. It was truly a freeing moment and since then we've been able to enjoy these types of projects so much more together. There is less tension, he has so much more freedom to explore and it really has opened up a whol...

This one is kind of fun! If you follow me on Instagram you know I did a "live" while recording this podcast as well! So the flow is a bit different and a bit longer because I kept talking as people joined. I discuss what happened at our first parent teacher conference when my older son was only 3 and how that shaped our parenting practices. You'll also hear the stark contrast in teacher feedback f...

I live in a house with all dudes. And it can be very frustrating when my boys don't understand what's going on for me every month. Our moods, capacity, ability, energy, etc are very much dedicated by our hormones. As a result, sometimes I'm a LOT more fun and have a huge burst of energy to do all the creative projects. And others, I have zero battery, I'm easily triggered and have a much shorter f...

This is such a tricky topic. Most of us were raised in a time without phones in our pockets let alone social media. A lot can come up for us around this topic. We want to make sure we are protecting our children from unwanted bullying, pressures and images. We want to keep their innocence as long as possible. AND we don't want them to be left out, embarrassed, or made fun of for not having access...

In this episode, we dive into a listener's questions about how to get their son to practice. I talk about how we as parents can "future project" when our kids won't complete the simplest task we are asking them to do and how that projection can distort the way we respond to and treat our children. I share some skills to help gain a better understanding around what is going on for us (childhood bel...

I too struggle with chaos. I am an extremely reactive person and hold onto anger and frustration for a long time. It's something I've always done and one of the big reasons I started parent coaching. Without tools, I'm a reactive mess! In this episode, I talk about a recent morning where so many things seemed to go wrong that I was completely drained before the day even began. My morning got messi...

In this episode, I get the pleasure of interviewing Feng Shui expert Patricia Lohan. Patricia shares incredible stories of how small shifts in the home transformed her clients' jobs, relationships, and spilled over into their children's lives. Trouble with homework? There's a feng shui answer for that. Siblings fighting, there's a feng shui answer for that too! Patricia shares so many doable ways...

I'm a little fired up about this topic! Because it's true! Default parents are NOT allowed to be inconvenient.  We are in constant service. We are the ones making sure all wants, needs, ambitions, feelings, etc are being tended to, nurtured and cared for and serviced. And when we are off, the whole family is off. Being all things, for all people, at all times is not sustainable. It's exhausting an...

Today we dive deeper into childhood beliefs around being "good" and your "goodness" as a person. I share more stories from my Telluride adventure with my parents and what I've been able to uncover since. From this trip, I've been able to connect the dots between my performative goodness and my real goodness. I have since realized that as a pastor's daughter, it was vital to my dad's appearance and...

I get a lot of feedback on my Instagram reels about how I am NOT teaching my children to be respectful. While I could debate that, I don't need to waste my energy because I know that's not true AND I know that I'm teaching my kids "respect" but in a different way. I am teaching my kids kindness, empathy, compassion, how to work in a group setting, generosity, and how to make a kind request vs. a d...

In this episode, I dive into cycle breaking around our families. I share why we are triggered the way that we are and what we can do to maintain our clarity and focus on our goals. I share a story about my very real triggering moment when on vacation with my family and how I was able to get sucked down my subconscious rabbit hole of what "should be." I share a story about how everyday triggers can...

This is a fun episode! I share my response to the reels going around Instagram and TikTok that have a video of wild children doing crazy things and the voice says "I'm sorry but gentle parenting is for gentle kids…I've got gangsters."  For the record, in most if not all of these videos, the children are doing totally developmentally normal exploration. Anyway! The truth is, that gentle parenting i...

In this episode, I discuss our stigma of anger and aggression and how to accept, instead of reject, this totally normal human emotion. It is so easy for us to try to avoid anger, try to correct aggression, and try to move away from this "bad" emotion because it makes us uncomfortable and brings up a good deal of fear and uncertainty. But the irony is that we model anger and aggression and more oft...

This is one of my favorite episodes! In this episode I talk about how our deeply rooted, traditional belief systems about children's behavior affects our ability to repair when we blow up at them. When we lose our cool on our children, these belief systems allow us to justify our reactions. I share how we can start to dismantle these beliefs and I offer a step by step formula to follow when we rup...

In this episode, I share a softer way to explore and explain the similarities and differences our children will notice and experience in the world. I also talk about ways to view our children's behaviors, not as triggering actions that need to be fixed, but rather helpful insights into the areas that still need healing and work within us. When we get too wrapped up in the narrative of "others" we...

In this episode, we explore a listener's question about how to manage their 7-year-old son's disrespectful behavior. We explore themes of defiance and control and I offer suggested scripts and techniques to meet their child's developmental needs. When we as parents are experiencing a lot of defiance and push back from our children this is a clear sign we are running low on connection. I give sever...

In this episode I interview Reece Anderson, founder of We Overcome Anything out of Australia. His 8-week program helps parents get out of their own way in order to support their teens, create more positive connections, lessen conflict, and find more ease in the relationship. Through his own battles of mental health and working in the sector, he realized a large disconnect with teens and parents. T...

Sometimes this nervous system regulation "stuff" can feel super unattainable and challenging. In this episode, I share with you a silly acronym I created in my house for my family that helps bring some humor into the equation. P.O.O.P. is the funny way to get back into emotional regulation and back into the driver's seat of parenting.  P: Pause O: Observe O: Orient P: Play This is just one more to...

Challenges around food can be incredibly stressful for parents. Not only do our children NEED food for body and brain development but meals and snacks happen many times a day EVERY SINGLE DAY. Today I am doing a deep dive on picky eating and how we as parents can pivot and adjust our methods to shift the negative narrative about food. I hope this serves all of the parents out there struggling with...

In this episode, I look at how our unmet needs and nervous system dysregulation contributes to how we react to our children. I break down ways to uncover default patterns in your life, how to identify your most important need(s), and how to create a grounding practice to regulate your nervous system. This will help you build your patience reserves in order to have more capacity for your children....

Every day we drop our children off at school can be a very triggering experience in today's United States. When I recorded this, the latest school shooting had occurred in Nashville, TN leaving 3 children and 3 adults dead.  As parents, it can feel as though our hands are tied and we have no choice but to roll the dice every day. In this episode, I talk about ways we can shift the dynamics, and mo...