Relationship Alive!

Are you curious to know the most common issue that I hear about from clients, and from listeners who write in? It’s communication - or, rather problems with communication. Whether it’s being heard, or feeling like you have no idea where your partner is coming from, or you’re trying to communicate one thing but your partner hears something completely different, or you’re always being criticized - t...

How do you hold a vision for your relationship without being trapped by perfectionism when it doesn’t quite measure up to the ideal? How do you manage time in your relationship so that you have time to nurture and build your connection? What are some practical ways that you can learn to value your and your partner’s uniqueness, and what you each bring to the table? And just why is commitment SO im...

What is the secret to cultivating inspiration in your relationship? And, if you’re single, how do you find people to date who will truly inspire you to be more of who you are, more conscious, more connected? To that end - I want today’s episode to inspire you: we’re going to talk about a path to connecting with the parts of yourself that are truly your core gifts - and how to bring those into your...

On our show, we’ve talked a lot about getting “triggered” - but what does it even mean to get triggered? Why do we hold trauma in our bodies? And how do we move through it so that we can live more freely, be more fully alive - and present for what life is bringing us in the moment? And if you’re in a relationship, how can you and your partner help each other heal - either the traumas of the past,...

Having healthy polarity is an important component of maintaining a spark with your partner. Have you wondered, though, about what that really means? Does that mean that one of us has to be “masculine”, and the other has to be “feminine” in order for this whole thing to work? How do you turn polarity into something that doesn’t become just a descent into stereotypes, but into a dynamic energy that...

Have you ever had the feeling that you get into the same kind of conflict, over and over again, in your relationship? And when you recognize that, do you feel more free- like you are able to stop the pattern in its tracks and do something better? Or, are you left feeling powerless once the train has left the station? Well, it turns out there is one major source of all conflicts within a couple, an...

Have you ever heard yourself saying “There’s a part of me that feels one way, and another part of me that feels another?” - or have you ever wondered why you might do things that seem counterproductive to what your actual intentions are? Do you have a mindfulness practice, and wonder how you can get more out of it - is it not quite transforming your life the way you thought it would? Or here’s ano...

Today’s guest is Dave Richo, a psychotherapist, teacher, workshop leader, and author of the well-known book “How To Be An Adult in Relationships- The 5 Keys to Mindful Loving”. In this conversation we explore topics found in his more recent book “How To Be an Adult In Love- Letting Love In Safely and Showing It Recklessly”, and his brand new book “You Are Not What You Think- The Egoless Path To Se...

Today, we’re going to talk about lies. Why do we lie - ever? And while it’s easy to perhaps scapegoat people who aren’t telling the whole truth - as with anything in relationship - it takes TWO to tango - so how does the person who’s being lied TO help create the dynamic? Most importantly - how do you bring your relationship back into balance, so that you can experience the power created by tellin...

Today’s guest is Sheri Winston, wholistic sexuality teacher, founder of the center for intimate arts, and author of the award-winning book “Women’s Anatomy of Arousal: Secret Maps to Buried Pleasure”. We’re going to talk about how the sexual energy of a feminine person works. We’re also going to talk about the female anatomy - and you just might find out some things that you NEVER knew before. She...

Today’s guests are none other than Harville Hendrix and Helen Lakelly Hunt, authors of “Getting the Love You Want” - which offers a step-by-step path for you and your partner to attain a more loving, supportive, and satisfying relationship. In this conversation, you’re going to get to hear exactly how their system of conscious relationship works, and come to a deeper understanding of what’s possib...

One of the biggest obstacles to being fully yourself in the present is being held back by the pain of the past. I’m thinking specifically of the endings that we go through. If you’re like me, you’ve been through a breakup or two in your life. Maybe you coasted through each one just fine - or maybe you collected a scar or two - or more. Whether you were the person leaving, or the person left behind...

We’ve talked a lot on this show about the stages of relationship - I’m thinking in particular of the John Gottman episode, and the Terry Real episode - how almost unavoidably the “honeymoon” ends and then the real relationship begins. Would you like to know some ways to get that spark back - in a way that’s sustainable? Do you know what you REALLY want in your relationship, and I’m talking about h...

Title: Recipe for a Secure, Healthy Relationship: Stan Tatkin If you’ve listened to some of the other episodes then by now you’ve heard how so much of what happens to us as kids can affect how we are, in relationship, as adults. You can get into the specifics if you want - and there are times when I think that’s a good idea - but you can also look at the big picture of whether or not you had a sec...

It’s been 17 straight weeks since the Relationship Alive podcast launched, and I hope you’re enjoying the deep dive into how to do relationships in a completely new way. This week, I’d like to give you a gift. There’s so much value in new information, new knowledge - I don’t know about you, but my temptation is to be always trying to learn something new, always trying to grow. And yet, some of our...

I wanted to put together something a little different for you today. You probably don’t know (yet) that I spent some time learning the art of physical comedy - you might call it “clown school” - at the Celebration Barn, here in South Paris, Maine. Looking back on the 15 years since then, it’s remarkable how many things I learned, about being present, about being a “yes,” and about rolling with wha...

What does it take to have a relationship that can thrive well into your 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s, and beyond? What are the best ways to FIND a conscious relationship? Or to shift your current relationship into a place of being energized for what’s possible? And have you ever wondered why it can be so easy to blame someone else in an argument - and if there’s any way to eradicate criticism and blame from...

You’ve heard it before - here, and elsewhere - in order to show up in relationship, you have to be able to show up for yourself. What does it mean to actually be able to show up for yourself? On top of that, have you ever experienced a split between your head and your heart - and do you know how to heal it? I’ve heard time and time again with friends and clients - “my heart wants one thing, my hea...

How do you get in touch with what you’re feeling in the moment? How do you take that a step further, and tune into your partner? And how do you take that state, and turn it into deep intimacy, connection, and...well...hot sex? And can you keep that dance alive with your partner even if you have children competing for your time and attention? Today, our guest is Dr. Keith Witt, Integral Psychologis...

When was the last time you got really angry? And...how did that go for you? Was it a positive experience, or...not? And...do you and your partner know how to use your anger to foster growth in your connection? The reason I’m asking is that today’s guest is Harriet Lerner, Clinical Psychologist and author of the classic book The Dance of Anger which has sold over 3 MILLION copies worldwide. Harriet...

Today I’d like to have a conversation about a topic that’s a little dicey for some of us. Do you or your partner use pornography? What place, if any, does it have in your relationship? Is it helpful? Is it creating conflict? Is it possible that it’s having an influence on your relationship and you don’t even know about it? Today my guest is Gary Wilson, from YourBrainonPorn.com, and author of the...

Does it seem that love comes and then goes away? Do you have the experience of being deeply in love with your partner one moment, and then the next moment feeling separate, or distant, or even carried away in a cloud of emotion? Well, we’re about to change all of that. Today we have part two of our conversation with Diana Richardson. In particular, we are going to focus on how to always “get back...

My philosophy is that relationships not only CAN be a vehicle for your own healing, but that it’s actually REQUIRED to do your work to heal from whatever is keeping you from fully showing up - in your life, in your relationship, AND in the bedroom. And just like we touched on in our conversation with Diana Richardson way back in episode two - there is tremendous potential for you, when you’re in r...

For this episode, we’re going to focus on something extremely simple and practical -  the importance of questions. How well do you know your partner? If you say you know them well, are you sure that you’re not actually making assumptions about them? And how do you cultivate your curiosity in a way that keeps your relationship fresh, instead of stuck in the same old patterns?  My guest today is Sus...

Are you looking for ways to breathe new life into your relationship? In today’s episode, we’re exploring the power of integrity to heal problems and generate passion in your connection with your partner. What does it mean to be honest? What are you actually committed to in your relationship? How do you turn a major problem - for instance, infidelity - into a catalyst for growth and even deeper int...