Rats In The Gutter

Nothing spoils the broth quite like remembering that you’re gonna die, though the rats recommend a daily memento mori to avoid delusions of immortality. Other bummers this week include mystery smells and the martial-homo tragedy of Achilles and Patroclus. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The rats are emotionally unstable this week. We think it has something to do with the retrogrades. Enjoy forty-ish minutes of arrested development and gymnastic avoidance. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It’s a cruel world but the rats think they’ve got a handle on it. This week they share their dos and donts, exchanging considered perspectives on different kinds of etiquette, ugly people in Melbourne, coexisting with a debilitating nicotine dependence, and anal bleaching. Support us on Patreon xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

this week, let them eat fritters! the rats get nostalgic about fritter festival, which they have never been to. there’s also some light commentary on the monarchy and the lethal stranglehold america has on the rest of the world (as always, free palestine) Find video episodes and bonus episodes on our Patreon xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

this week the rats are fired up about political violence, dead naming Russel Brand, the class warfare that is travel by air, and Brian Tamaki’s big glass closet. Support us on Patreon xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Want some tips on how to combat writers block? The luteal phase? Drunk history? Johanna’s specific walk of shame requirements? Samuel’s relaxation routine? Trad wives? Look no further! And that’s on leeches in the fridge x Support us on Patreon for episodes early and in video xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

MaXXXine is out! Madam is out! Richard III’s corpse is out (in a carpark)! Sam and Johanna are sick of therapy but they absolutely love Michelle Branch - buckle up for a beautiful and spiteful 34.40 minutes ratties x Get episodes early & in video by supporting us on Patreon xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ep description: Our (b)rats are back in the studio and if you thought they were over screaming themselves hoarse over the acid green sensation that is Charli’s latest offering - you are sorely mistaken! Additional material includes a history lesson, an elocution lesson and some good old fashioned self referencing indulgence Support us on Patreon xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more i...

The seasons cleave to Charli XcX and the world is now Brat green! Join Johanna and Sam for a deep dive into THE album of the year (soz Beyonce) with side notes including Andy Cohen’s femme shark tank, the self suck community and Azealia Bank’s extensive dry cleaning requirements. Find video versions of episodes + bonus episodes on our Patreon xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more info...

the rats have difficulty centering themselves this week because the world is a gleaming conundrum equal parts pleasure and shiny anguish. So they anchor the only way they know how; talking shit. Video episodes and more available on our Patreon xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

is bisexuality a myth? does pussy count as a meal and does it have a smooth finish? this week the rats go deep within themselves to find out where in the binary they live and whether or not identifiers matter when you’re getting properly laid. Full episode available on our Patreon xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week the rats cusp extracurricular exhaustion and the ambient horror of a world on fire, while also finding time to assess the particular madness of aged celebrities, consider Jar Jar Pinks as a prescient gender-radical, and wonder at the face-card cost of using Ozempic (with a less than subtle nod to the songstresses of a generation - Creed) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more in...

against all legal advice, the rats describe some of their extracurricular activities, which they’re forced to do because podcasting is largely pro bono. Also on the table this week—predatory bisexuals, show me that sweet lil peach, Bayonetta’s lycra wedgie, and bastard-Negronis. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

After a brief work related hiatus - the rats are back in situ with some juicy and shocking personal revelation’s. No spoilers here - tune in and slurp that hot piping tea! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It’s here—the rats live! Effortlessly eclipsing The Eras Tour as the season's most sought-after ticketed event, Cosgrove and Te Kani set Auckland’s Q Theatre alight with blistering charismas, hard hitting takes on social issues, and a tasteful in memorium for celebrity human trafficking victim Madeline McCann. Utterly unmissable. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

the rats try and have a critical conversation about some frankly profound theatre they recently saw together, and are thwarted by a bug in the system. Ironically, said play had themes of failure in art, in life, and the vertigo and grief of ambition giving way to defeat. We like when a theme comes full circle. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

And so the Oscars are here. It’s difficult to get excited about cinematic glories against the backdrop of genocide and ambient psychological warfare with warmongering zionists. But we try. Support us on Patreon xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Body dysmorphia is as strong a theme this week as it’s ever been. Dune Part Two looms like a mammoth cultural moment. Fifties housewives dropping tapeworms into their own eyes as a desperate form of weight management seem smarter than most in light of Ozempic and traditional anorexias. Fake twink Timothee Chalamet and his slender boy-wife Zendaya do nothing for the rats' self image. Hosted on Acas...

In a fugue state of rap beefs and genocides the rats try and cohere a week of internet, in brief. Notably featuring kosher cocktails, Hamas-friendly aperitifs, the American Mong, gluten-free blood flour, and screaming. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week, the rats invite comedian and fellow carnie/attention whore Eli Matthewson in. They exchange stories of willful self exposures, humiliations, and the dangers of not having a side hustle outside improv comedy (a slippery slope tbh). Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week in stinking hot Tāmaki, our rats are more delusional than you thought humanly possible! Sam and Johanna dissect various social and personal quandaries (thigh friction, peddling tickets to international comedy festivals and a succinct definition of the NZ political climate) all for your listening pleasure. Reserve tickets to our show at the Q Theatre PodFest! See you there ratties xx Host...

The horrors persist but so do we. This week, the rats wax on about the survivalism of nature’s reviled critters, pariahs such as cockroaches, wasps, and the extremely unhappy dog next door. Also, Hannah Arendt and the particular body horror of a rat girl summer. Reserve tickets to our show at the Q Theatre PodFest! See you there ratties xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informatio...

Samuel and Johanna are still deep in the northland wilderness which has done wonders for their sense of reality (or lack thereof!) Tune in to this episode completely devoid of facts but filled with delusional musings on periods, dead flies and the dangers of rugby. Reserve tickets to our show at the Q Theatre PodFest! See you there ratties xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informa...

The rats have gone bush to work on themselves. Critical distance from their natural city habitus gives pause for introspection, a reserve of intellectual acumen used to speak eloquently on various hard hitting topics; such as political scandals, body horror, Rena Owen, and the absurdity of luxury brands. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Happy New Year straight from the gutter! This week, Johanna and Samuel are back with a inappropriate vengeance, speculating wildly on all the essential current affairs—The Golden Globes' trainwreck intro, Gypsy Rose Blanchard’s Instagram and of course Epstein’s alphabetized flight list! Gorgeous video versions of every episode and more are available on our Patreon xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com...