raising the curtins

173. name that candy 26.07.2024 4:59 ↓

Despite years of shoveling these cylinders diabetes inducing shapes into their mouths, my kids had no idea what their favorite candy was actually called.

172. homesick 20.07.2024 7:31 ↓

Trying not to be a main character when my daughter misses her grandmother more than she did me. You know, the woman that gave birth to her!?

171. stray thoughts 16.07.2024 1:00 ↓

My empathetic ways started young.

170. joy is pushing my buttons 15.07.2024 3:02 ↓

Why I don’t think there is a more epic animated film than Inside Out.

169. shitty snuggles 20.06.2024 2:21 ↓

My normally non-snuggling baby finally decides she will cuddle with me, after a full-court press out in her diaper.

168. family time on the fringe 16.06.2024 3:10 ↓

A good time is any time I get to make cock jokes.

167. the chokey 07.06.2024 3:27 ↓

A necklace around the neck is not a noose. Chill TF out, Karen.

166. dildoes, drugs, and other d's 28.05.2024 6:22 ↓

A wholesome, beard game gets raunchy thanks to the minds of my my family.

165. i'm gonna wreck it 20.05.2024 4:24 ↓

Why do I constantly break shit?

163. no more pick me girl 18.04.2024 4:50 ↓

Yes, the woman that writes and talks about vasectomies and pubic hair is also a children’s book writer who is having a hard time getting published. Go figure.

162. showers in solitude 10.03.2024 2:42 ↓

A not-talked-about reason why moms need alone time.

161. you're not going to break down 14.02.2024 4:08 ↓

It’s a rite of passage to experience the heart-pounding anxiety of a near-empty tank.

160. house tours suck 31.01.2024 4:06 ↓

While I enjoy touring other people’s homes, showcasing my chaotic, half-decorated space is a nightmare.

159. baby anorexia 22.01.2024 5:45 ↓

Having an easy baby isn’t always a blessing. For me, it almost caused my daughter to die.

158. how can people afford this 07.01.2024 5:40 ↓

My unfiltered take on Florida’s skyrocketing housing market and related expenses that is making life unaffordable.

157. dream the impossible wet dream 18.12.2023 4:52 ↓

Post-vasectomy expectations are a damn joke.

156. locked door 14.12.2023 3:17 ↓

My attempt to shield my kids (or anyone for that matter) that doesn’t want all the TMI about my married life.

155. baby it's cold outside 08.12.2023 2:49 ↓

Must everything be offensive?

154. this is a season 25.11.2023 3:40 ↓

That time again where I freak out about my responsibilities as a mother and full time employee.

153. watch yo mouth 30.10.2023 3:57 ↓

My teenager was suspended from school for something she said, and in the end, I was actually proud of her.

152. don't shoot up my baby 27.10.2023 3:42 ↓

My daughter was struggling back to health and all the doc wants to do is shoot her up with vaccinations.

151. take me to church 23.10.2023 5:54 ↓

Signed my girls up for a church ceremony, but was slapped in the face with a ‘belief agreement’ that didn’t align with mine.

150. my dad is dead 08.10.2023 3:10 ↓

How do you grieve someone you never really had? When my father passed, I didn’t feel loss; I felt the weight of a lifetime spent without him. And maybe that’s ok.

149. three inches is big 30.09.2023 1:46 ↓

Trying to explain ride height limits backfires because my husband only has 3 things on his mind.

148. you don't like fish, asshole 22.09.2023 2:28 ↓

Ever warn your kid not to do something and secretly hope they’ll learn the hard way?