Raising Godly Boys Minute

Integrity. We sometimes call it, “Honor,” or “Our Word.” If we say, “You have my word,” we wish for that person to believe us and trust us. Not just now, but in the future as well. Yet, Integrity is a difficult thing for young men to build in today’s society. They are surrounded by peers, cultural icons, and even relatives who lie to “save their backsides.” The Bible says, “Better is a poor man wh...

“Valentine’s Day! Yuck!” Is this the type of response you hear when you ask your son about Valentine’s Day? We typically think the holiday is “girlie” and centered around flowers and chocolate. However, Valentine’s Day is the perfect opportunity to remind your son of Jesus’s love for us and the strength it took for Him to go to the cross because of His love for humanity. When referred to in the Bi...

John Eldredge writes,  “Men want a battle to fight, an adventure to live, and a beauty to rescue. That is what is written in their hearts. That is what little boys play at. That is what men's movies are about. You just see it. It is undeniable.” In today’s world, those desires can become distorted, twisted, or boys can be shamed out of righteous desires to pursue the lies society paints with...

Do you know how microwave popcorn works? Each kernel has a tiny drop of water inside. When that drop of water is heated up, the kernel explodes into popcorn! Here’s what I want to hone in on– even though they are placed in the same bag and heated in the same microwave— each kernel will turn into popcorn at different times. In the same way, your son will develop at his own rate. It’s very normal fo...

How much food can one boy eat? What about ten boys? If your son is anything like mine, they can put away some groceries. David and the other leaders planned ahead, and had a cooler full of food for the boys' outdoor leadership training retreat. What they did not count on was the fish. Camping right next to a lake, the boys spent every free moment with a line in the water, built a fire, and co...

It’s getting harder and harder to find programming on TV, movies in the theaters, or books in the bookstore to which we, as parents, feel comfortable exposing our children. Guarding their hearts and minds becomes infinitely more difficult the day you hand them their first smartphone. Because boys are typically very visual, in both their learning and what stimulates them emotionally, our “visual so...

Have you ever felt like an outsider? Like you didn’t fit in? God created us with an innate desire to belong, to connect with others, to be part of a community.  Our sons are no different. Even when they act uninterested, hide in their room, or say they don’t care, they still long to fit it. They want to join with others and experience the thrill of being part of something bigger than themselves. O...

Does your son know how to succeed? A young boy was talking to JD, an infectiously happy disc-golf expert who drove trucks for a living. Eyes crinkling, JD told the boy, “I figured out the secret to making money as a truck driver.  Wanna hear it?” The boy nodded eagerly, and JD answered with a smile, “Keep the left door closed.” What JD meant was, “don’t stop unnecessarily; keep on driving.” Whethe...

Teach your son to do the best he can with what God has given him.  Violinist Niccolo Paganini was playing a piece in front of an audience when, one by one, his violin strings began to snap. Finally, Niccolo was left with only one single working string. Unfazed, he finished the piece on the single string he had left.  This is a wonderful example of focusing on our strengths. Our Creator has a speci...

Tim Allen once said, “Do you know what causes sibling rivalry? Having more than one kid.” Worldly speaking, this is true. And funny. However, from a biblical perspective, the cause of sibling rivalry can reside in an “only child” household, too, for the ultimate cause is our sinful nature. The selfish cries of “Mine!” can manifest themselves in the presence of friends or relatives just the same. J...

Is your son ready to face life? Would you like him to be? Giving your son challenges to overcome strengthens him to take on more.  Hiking a misty morning trail, sweating and pushing himself on the football field, or learning the thrill of shooting his kayak down a roaring rapid, powering through the river with eager strokes all build in him a mindset of success to overcome what life brings him. Le...

“You’re not listening.” Have you said this to your son lately? Maybe he was clicking his pen or fidgeting with a toy rather than paying attention to your words. He appears to be ignoring you. However, his annoying behavior could be what helps him understand your instructions. Boys can’t process sentence after sentence after sentence. Typically, they are kinesthetic and learn best when physically e...

Does your son have a direction?  Has he chosen what he wants his character to be? You can help him do this, you know. When you do, help him choose a character not based on pleasure or self, but on fulfilling God’s purpose for his life. Albert Einstein once said, “To make a goal of comfort or happiness has never appealed to me; a system of ethics built on this basis would be sufficient only for a h...

Teach your son to be a friend to all– even to those who are missing buttons.   In the classic children’s book Corduroy by Don Freeman, a little stuffed bear sits on a store shelf. Children see the bear and consider purchasing him. But when they see that Corduroy is missing a button on his overalls, they put him back on the shelf.  One day, a child decides to buy Corduroy, despite his missing butto...

Have you ever wanted to talk to your son?  Like, really talk?  Life can come at them hard and fast in today’s world. Chris was concerned about his son after cancer took his wife.  His son always said he was fine, but Chris wondered. On a campout with their troop, when all the rock-climbing and tower-building was complete, Chris and his son went to fish.  As the sun was setting and Canadian geese c...

Almost all of us have been bullied or observed someone bully others. How do we help our sons stand up to a tormentor without retaliating or being a pushover? Devon joined the swim team last summer. A few teammates made fun of him because he wasn’t part of the “in” crowd. Others saw but didn’t know how to help. When Devon asked his parents what to do, they told him, “Just continue to be the person...

As soon as you found out you were having a son, you probably started dreaming about what he would be like.  Maybe you started dreaming about what he would grow up to be. Maybe you even laid out your old football jersey, wondering if your son would be a quarterback like you were in high school.  Maybe. But maybe not. Many times, sons surprise us with their interests. You might expect him to love sp...

What is the allure of camping?  Why do children want to sleep in tents, wander trails with flashlights, climb trees, and have adventures? Painter Vito Campenella once said, “The world is all sense, life, soul and body, the image of the Almighty, fashioned to glorify Him with power, wisdom, and love.” God’s power is evident in his creation, and often, he can speak to us there when we are away from...

God sees the x-ray of your son’s heart.  Brad Henry went to the doctor because of some knee pain. Looking at the x-ray, the doctor asked Brad, “Have you ever been shot?”  Brad answered, “Yes, thirty-five years ago when I was rabbit hunting!”  It turned out that a piece of bullet had been lodged in Brad’s knee for decades.  As Brad’s story illustrates– X-rays can see what the human eye cannot. And...

Does your son lay around playing electronic games or scrolling through social media instead of helping around the house? Unfortunately, many preteens and teens are conditioned to reach for an electronic device the minute their minds start to wander. They need guidance to redirect their efforts. Consider assigning your sons chores, such as mowing the lawn, making their beds, or washing the dishes....

Does your son have a “spotter”? In NASCAR, each driver has a “spotter.” It’s a person who stands high above the racetrack and communicates, through a radio, what’s behind, around, and ahead of the driver. As Brad Henry points out in his book Destination- The Winner’s Circle, every young man needs a spotter. They need someone who has a wider perspective, who can point out potential issues behind an...

Could your boy be a hero? Chris and his friends ran down to the beach ahead of their leaders when two ladies, frantic and crying, came running to them pointing out to sea.  Their brother, a weak swimmer, was caught in a strong current and was fighting for his life, unable to make it to shore. Two of the strongest swimmers raced out to save him as the others formed a human chain, wading into the cu...

Want to teach your son right and wrong? The outdoors is a great place to start. When you’re hunting, camping, or hiking, natural consequences are everywhere. If you don’t aim your shot well, you won’t harvest a deer. If you fail to pitch your tent correctly, it will tumble around you. If you don’t consult the weather forecast, you may get caught in a rainstorm on your hiking trail. Always supervis...

Can you be sure you are raising your children properly?  How can you know you are right?  With so many different voices yelling at you from social media, friends, and the world, how can you know what is true? For instance, science mistakenly used to tell us margarine was better than butter, and eggs would kill us.  Who can you trust these days? Baroque sculptor Gian Lorenzo Bernini once said, “The...

Every night at bedtime, Jane would kiss her five-year-old son’s cheek, and say, “I love you so much.” One night, her son said, “Mom, I know you love me. But are you proud of me?” That’s a true story that Dr. Emerson Eggerich shared while teaching about his book, Love and Respect. Hearing her son’s question, Jane realized her son was already craving respect. She changed her approach.  At bedtime, s...