Polishing Turds: A Bad Music Podcast

We conclude our Nickelback series by summarizing everything we've learned so far and establishing our "Closing Argument" on this band's artistic merit. To wit: we bring you "THE TOP TEN REASONS WHY NICKELBACK SUCKS"! To support our thesis we introduce new evidence, including some songs and anecdotes you haven't heard before, as well as an illuminating "Scien...

How exactly did Nickelback go from a run-of-the-mill post-grunge group to the Western world’s biggest musical punching bag? In Part III of our series we trace the origin of Nickelback’s status as a Meme, a wild story featuring football protests, internet pranks, snarky politicians, and so much more!  We also share the results of an exclusive Nickelback Fan Survey, where actual Nickelback fans expl...

The saga of Nickelback continues as Chad boldly ventures into new frontiers of shameless musical pandering. Can he help us remember the past? Can he heal the world and inspire revolution? Can he encourage your girlfriend to put something in her mouth? BE ADVISED: Cal and Nick are not responsible for any brain damage you may experience as a result of listening to the music from this episode... FOLL...

Are Nickelback really as bad as everyone thinks? How did these four nondescript Canadians earn a worldwide reputation as a living musical atrocity? At long last, one of rock and roll's most notorious turds is finally getting polished! In the first of a four-part series, we cover the band's origins in the remote town of Hanna, Alberta, where frontman Chad Kroeger grew up committing small-...

We clean up after the DIRTY, JUVENILE, and utterly OFFENSIVE career of THE BLOODHOUND GANG, the hooligans behind "The Bad Touch," "Fire Water Burn," and other ironic comedy-rap hits.  With their unique brand of distasteful-but-ingeniously-clever humor, The Bloodhound Gang built a career that merged catchy hooks with politically incorrect jokes that NO ONE could get away with to...

Cal and Nick investigate a popular internet rumor that Avril Lavigne secretly died in 2003 and was replaced by a body double named Melissa Vandella.  FOLLOW US: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@polishing_turds Instagram: polishing.podcast email: polishingturdspodcast@gmail.com

Welcome to the latter half of Avril Lavigne's musical journey: the part where her music gets REALLY annoying. In this episode we cover the obnoxious hit "Girlfriend," her cringy attempts to ape Millenial pop music, her marriage to Nickelback's Chad Kroeger, and the disastrous "Hello Kitty" song that led to charges of cultural appropriation.  At the same time, we'...

We make things complicated for Avril Lavigne, the pop-punk princess of the early 2000s whose style was so unique it quickly became a meme.  Learn all about Avril's country music origins, the messy disputes over how much of her music she actually wrote, and even how Avril was involved with the Spongebob Squarepants movie! FOLLOW US: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@polishing_turds Instagram:...

Cal takes the lead for the first time as we explain the astonishing story of The Shaggs; the bizarre cult-like family that produced the absolute strangest rock album ever made. Along the way we take attempt to take a crack at a difficult question: what makes music "good" or "bad" in the first place? How did a trio of teenagers with no musical knowledge produce something that ar...

Why is most Christmas music so unbearably bad? Today we try to answer that question as we dive through a pile of CDs Nick bought at a thrift store. So grab some eggnog and enjoy some wacky Yuletide anthems by everyone from Rosie O'Donnell to Big Bad Voodoo Daddy! Happy Holidays to all of you beautiful people from Polishing Turds!!! FOLLOW US: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@polishing_turds...

We wrap up our mammoth exposition on the Cyrus musical legacy. Miley cleans up her act and puts out the most ambitious and interesting music of her career, while Billy Ray struggles to regain his relevance before finally striking gold in an out-of-nowhere collaboration with Lil Nas X. FOLLOW US: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@polishing_turds Instagram: polishing.podcast email: polishingturdspod...

In part 6 of our 7 part Cyrus family series, we explore the career of up-and-coming Gen Z sensation Noah Cyrus, as well as the other forgotten Cyrus siblings, all of whom have produced some fascinating music! (If you've actually made it this far into the series, how please consider giving us a 5-star rating. Thanks, darlin'!) FOLLOW US: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@polishing_turds I...

What was Billy Ray up to during Miley's prolific and head-turning career as Hannah Montana? Quite a lot! Between 2006 and 2014 the Achy Breaky Heartthrob revived his sagging career, joined an alternative rock band, and watched his family implode under the pressure of worldwide attention. It's a dark and bittersweet tale, but as always the good ol' boy from Kentucky finds a way to ke...

In Part 4 of our epic Cyrus Dynasty series, we take you on a guided tour of the Miley Cyrus' most shocking exploits, from pole dancing to bong hits to twerking her ass off at the VMAs!  Join us as we try to understand why Miley's aesthetic shifted so radically during this period, why so many were shocked and whether or not some greater good actually came out of it.  FOLLOW US: YouTube: h...

Sweet Niblets! Cal and Nick break down the iconic Disney Channel series that launched Miley Cyrus into stardom.  FOLLOW US: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@polishing_turds Instagram: polishing.podcast email: polishingturdspodcast@gmail.com

Welcome to another Bonus Minisode! In what is perhaps our least Polished effort to date, Cal and Nick ditch the script and have some fun by examining some of our favorite internet/meme artists of the past 15 years, including Tay Zonday ("Chocolate Rain"), Vennu Mallesh, Scuzz Twittly, and more!  (P.S. Seriously Wendy's you owe us some free food for this one!) FOLLOW US: YouTube: htt...

The Saga of Cyrus continues as Billy Ray deals with the aftermath of "Achy Breaky Heart" and struggles to hold onto his stardom. We examine his hokey follow-up records, his godawful Christian album, and his surprisingly good LP "Trail of Tears." We also review the early roles of Billy Ray's acting career which... let's just say he's no Marlon Brando! FOLLOW US: Y...

In the first of a six-part epic on the notorious Cyrus family (Billy Ray, Miley, Noah, et al) we take on the Master of the Mullet and get to the Achy Breaky Heart of how this self-described hillbilly became the #1 singer in America.  FOLLOW US: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@polishing_turds Instagram: polishing.podcast email: polishingturdspodcast@gmail.com

We get in the ring with Five Finger Death Punch, the black belt senseis of toxic bro metal. Why is this band so hated by metal purists while simultaneously embraced  by every truck nut-sporting douchebro in the heartland? We'll break down all the sordid controversies surrounding this band in what is easily one of our most entertaining episodes yet! Featuring guest contributions from Jess Leon...

In our very first Polishing Turds "Minisode" we're sharing the VERY FIRST thing we ever recorded for this show! This proof-of-concept was never really intended for the public, but at the requests of several close friends we've decided to release it anyway.  We're covering the strange story of Discharge, a legendary punk band whose style took a radical left turn toward glam...

We dunk on the Looney legacy of Space Jam, reviewing both the film and its accompanying selection of R&B bops.  How is the "Space Jam" theme tied to one of the biggest one-hit wonders of the 90s? Why did Warner Brothers kick Spike Lee off the project? Are the talent-stealing Nerdlucks trying to make a metaphysical argument about the nature of success? All these questions and more ans...

We resurrect the tortured legacy of Creed, one of the most reviled (and successful) bands of the late 90s. Learn the surprisingly dark backstory of vocalist Scott Stapp; from his tragic upbringing to his latter day struggles with fame, addiction, and mental illness. We'll also examine whether Creed really counts as "Christian Rock" and what the band's lyrics are actually trying...

Remember that weird Russian girl pop duo from the early 2000s? What was the deal with that anyway? Were they really lesbians? In this episode we look at the  surprising story of t. A.T.u., how their bizarre project came to be and what impact they had on the LGBT community worldwide. Along the way, we take a serious look at the harrowing state of gay rights in Russia.   FOLLOW US: YouTube: https://...

Stop, collaborate and LISTEN as we chip away at the complicated career of Vanilla Ice. Seriously, if you thought "Ice Ice Baby" is corny wait till you hear the rest of the "Ice"-berg, i.e. Vanilla's forays into gangsta rap, nu-metal, reality TV and more! We'll also tackle the bigger questions of Ice's authenticity, cultural appropriation and whether or not Ice de...

WE WE WE SO EXCITED to talk about Rebecca Black, the much-maligned teen singer whose notorious viral hit "Friday" blew up on YouTube almost exactly 10 years ago. Join us as we explore the dark and fascinating history of Ark Music Factory, the company that wrote and produced "Friday" and many even-cringier singles. We'll walk through Rebecca's tough but inspiring caree...