Pixelated Sausage - Attack the Backlog

Hey there everyone! This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Resident Evil 0, the prequel to Resident Evil starring Rebecca Chambers--aka, not Claire Redfield or Jill Valentine--and cool dude Billy Coen, with his super sweet tribal tattoo that apparently spells out “Motherlove” making me hate it (and him) even more than I already do. Billy hatred aside, 0 is a disappointing expe...

Hey there everyone! This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about The Mean Greens - Plastic Warfare--random, I know--a third-person competitive shooter where you play as toy army men and battle across familiar environments like backyards, kitchen tables, and fish tanks. If that sounds interesting to you, check out the episode to find out just how mean these greens be.

This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Mafia, specifically the Definitive Edition, which is a remake of the original game from 2002. Technically, this is a bit of a cheat episode since I did play the original when it came out, but since this is a full-blown remake, I said, "Fuck it, this is my show, and I can do whatever the heck I want," and whatever the heck I did. Regardless of hecks g...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, I crash all the bands in the remake of Crash Bandicoot, a game that's anything but a hoot and more resembling of poo. As bright and colorful as the game may be, it sure made me miserable as you will see. As someone new to the series, it's rather disappointing, 'cause now when it comes to checking out the sequels, I'm more than a little weary. But like with Go...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, I slide my way through an average game before discovering the game I played is completely different from the game others have played, except the only way to know it's different is by being told it's different. Why? Because the game itself tells you nothing. Confused? Welcome to the club--the, "I played Vanquish, but I didn't really play Vanquish" club--it's q...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, I blow up everything but dolls in Just Cause 3, a game where you cause mayhem and destruction...just 'cause. This marks a first for Attack the Backlog. This is the first time I've ever gone back into my backlog to finish an old save, instead of restarting a game from the beginning (if it's something I've played before, but never finished). I won't go into fur...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, I go on a roller coaster of love to like with Returnal, a third-person roguelite shooter that takes a lot inspiration from shmups and successfully translates it to a 3D environment. The gameplay is sublime, but because of the way it's structured, the game doesn't respect your time. What could have been one of my favorite games of all-time is, instead, just a...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, I return to the world of Ratchet & Clank with  Ratchet & Clank: Going Commando . I went in with the highest of expectations and left with the saddest of realizations: I, maybe, don't like Ratchet & Clank . I loved the original game when I played it so many years ago and loved the reboot/remake, but, until now, those were the only Ratchet &amp...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, watch as I duel and reviewel my way through the beautiful forests and valleys of Ghost of Tsushima , a game where you play as a samurai fighting against tradition in order to bring freedom and peace to Japan. If that sounds like your jam, I can't recommend it highly enough. I may sound negative at times in the review, but my experience was unique as outside i...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc puts on their best Obama mask and gets high as a kite while burning fields of dreams in Call of Juarez: The Cartel , the kind of dreams that only weed can make true, especially when playing a game that's worst that poo. The Cartel is a bad game in so many ways and the kind of game that leaves you constantly asking why as you play. Call of Juarez: The Car...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc stays sweet and wholesome instead of tying hens while tentacling some holes, son, in  Octodad: Dadliest Catch , a game where you play as an octopus who marries a human woman with two human children (who are never explained) and has a penchant for making a mess wherever he goes, delightfully so. Octodad originally came out on January 30, 20...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc spies on teenage girls while trapping vampire ninjas in  Night Trap , an FMV game that's pretty stupid and infamous for its help in creating the ESRB thanks to having scenes that were considered, "sexually suggestive and exploitive."  Night Trap  originally came out on October 15, 1992, for Sega CD and has since been released on a handful...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc furries it up with their best cat suit as the run, jump, and butt stomp their way through the worlds of  Super Mario 3D World , a Mario game no one played when it originally came out that found a second life on the Switch (like every Wii U game) and is probably the closest we'll ever get to a proper Super Mario Bros. 2 sequel, which, if you know me,...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc falls down left and right and struggles to regain their footing in Max Payne 3 , a game that is technically a Max Payne game, but feels more like a Man of Fire game than a Max Payne game, sans the Walken, but not the walking. Anyway, something-something, cleaning the Jersey shore with my fists and nothing more, cheers and enjoy the...wait for it...show....

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Majima is everywhere in town and Marc is nowhere to be found in  Yakuza Kiwami , a a remake of the first game in the Yakuza series that adds more than just a fresh coat of paint and the original Japanese voice acting, making it worth playing for both new fans and olds fans alike. Anyway, something-something, that's not a deer, that's just Majima in costu...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc throws apples at anything and everything while waiting to die so they can throw even more apples in PUBG , a game people like to say started the whole battle royale thing even though it didn't. But whatever. It's an okay game, I guess, but it's no Apex Legends , so who cares, eh. Am I right or am I right? Spoilers: I am so very, very right. Anyway, somet...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc spins, twirls, and stumbles their way through the skies and waters of Nights into Dreams , a game that's more nightmarish than dreamy with only a fantastic soundtrack making up for what is otherwise a terrible game. Anyway, something-something, feels like a good night for a curse, but I guess things could be worse, cheers and enjoy the...wait for it...sh...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc rages through these corridors, those corridors, and morridors in Alien Rage, a game about raging as you try and kill every alien before they kill you first! It's a fitting title for a shitty title in this episode with the witty title; by the way, when I was a kid, I performed in a piano recital. Anyway, something-something, pretty cheap and awfully weak,...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc goes on a handful of online dates in Five Dates , a game about, well, online dating that is, surprisingly, nowhere near as cringey as it could have been. Your buddy may be a bit of a weirdo creep, but the dates you go on are far from weird and creepy, so if you want that online dating action without actually online dating, Five Dates is the game for you!...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc shows just how much they're willing to do for a Patron, shitting their pants, making no kind of sanse, all while spying on murderous furry robots in Five Nights at Freddy's , a game that takes Chuck E. Cheese and changes it to Fuck U. Please!   Anyway, something-something, it was a self-induced hell, but only lasted a spell, cheers and enjoy the...w...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc descends down hills while dehydrated in Descenders , a game all about dominating mountains one course at a time, lest you fail and have to start over from the beginning. It's basically a downhill mountain biking roguelike and it's super rad.   Anyway, something-something, I just want a new Downhill Domination , come on world, it's never too late son...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc rides pains, brains, and automofeels--even I think this is terrible--in Psychonauts ...1, naut 2, a game where you enter the minds of NPCs and see what happens when you pee ‘nside...or something like that--doubling down on the terribleness, eh. Psychonauts originally came out on April 19th, 2005 for PC and Xbox, and came out a few months later on P...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc shoots their way through the forests, villages, caves, and ruins of  Jumanji: The Video Game , the video game all about Jumanji : The Movie. Not the original movie starring Robin Williams, but the new (good) ones, starring The Rock, Jack Black, Kevin Hart, Karen Gillan, that one Jonas brother, the guy who’s too old for this shit, and the fanfi...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc hacks and slashes their way through the forests and deserts of  Cat Quest II , the sequel to Cat Quest , which adds a playable dog companion and doubles down on the cat puns with dog puns to go along with ‘em. It’s still as cute as it ever was and brings the series to Xbox for the first time. Cat Quest II originally came out on September...

On this episode of Attack the Backlog, Marc jumps, falls, and shoots their way through the streets of  Call of Duty: Warzone , Activision's free-to-play, second (and successful) attempt at making a battle royale game set in the Call of Duty universe. Call of Duty: Warzone  originally came out on March 10th, 2020 for PC, PS4, and Xbox One.   Anyway, something-something, I feel a bit...