Parenting Matters Now with Dr. Roger Smith

To make dining out a pleasant experience rather than a source of stress, Dr. Roger Smith emphasizes that "appealing public behavior" must be trained before you enter the restaurant. He encourages parents to involve children as active "team members" by teaching them how to order their own food, interact politely with staff, and consider the experience of other diners. By starting in casual settings...

Dr. Roger Smith highlights that praise is essential for a child’s development, acting like "sunlight to a flower" to help them truly blossom. By using the Three S's—making praise Specific, Sincere, and Soon—parents can move beyond generic compliments to reinforce genuine growth. This approach focuses on honoring a child's effort and character traits rather than innate traits, ensuring they feel tr...

Life rarely goes according to plan, and parenting is no exception. Dr. Roger Smith discusses the vital shift from total parental control to fostering flexibility in your children. Using travel mishaps as a metaphor, he explores how parents can model emotional balance when things go wrong—whether it’s a spilled glass of juice or a missed opportunity. Learn how to train your children to navigate mul...

We’ve all heard the saying, "Don’t judge a book by its cover," but do we apply it to our kids? Dr. Roger Smith uses a library find to challenge how we react to our children's behavior. Instead of judging outward actions or styles at first glance—which can feel manipulative or lead to harsh labels—he encourages parents to ask deeper questions about motivation and heart. By seeking the "story inside...

Is travel essential for a child’s development? Dr. Roger Smith explores Mark Twain’s idea that travel is "fatal to prejudice," explaining how exposing children to different cultures, languages, and perspectives prevents narrow-mindedness. Whether you’re crossing an ocean or just visiting the next town over, encountering people who live differently helps children move past assumptions and learn to...

Life is far more interesting when we stop to ask "Why?" Using a hidden iron ring on a canal wall in Manchester as an example, Dr. Roger Smith explains how parents can train their children to be world-class observers. This episode explores how to turn everyday walks into "clue-finding" missions, helping kids piece together the history and purpose of the things they see. Learn how simple activities...

Parenting isn't a solo act; it’s a team sport. Using the analogy of a pair of scissors, Dr. Roger Smith illustrates how two different perspectives—though they may seem opposed—are both necessary to get the job done. This episode explores why mothers and fathers bring unique, essential strengths to the family and how to navigate those differences without seeing your spouse as an opponent. Learn why...

Forgiveness is more than just saying "I'm sorry"—it’s a vital life skill that requires empathy and intentionality. Dr. Roger Smith discusses how parents can move beyond "magic words" to help children truly understand the impact of their actions. This episode provides a roadmap for conflict resolution, teaching children how to observe another’s feelings, recognize their own role in a conflict, and...

True leadership isn't about barking orders from the front; it's about influencing and empowering others to grow. Dr. Roger Smith challenges parents to "lead by walking behind" their children. By providing a safety net rather than a roadblock, you allow your children to exercise curiosity and build confidence. Whether it's letting a toddler take the lead on a hiking trail or tasking a teenager with...

Are you fanning the flames of your child's imagination or accidentally dousing them? Drawing inspiration from the founder of FedEx—who was told his business plan was impossible—Dr. Roger Smith warns parents against "thinking in obstacles." This episode features the classic poem "Can and Can't" to illustrate the power of perseverance. Learn why your children sometimes need to risk failure to find t...

Whether it's airplanes, robotics, or gardening, your child has unique passions that deserve a launchpad. Dr. Roger Smith explains why it’s vital to lean into your child’s curiosities, even if they differ from your own. This episode offers practical advice on how to expand their world by seeking out experts, visiting themed locations, and finding books that bring their interests to life. Learn how...

Are you missing the subtle signals your child is sending you? Dr. Roger Smith explains that whether a child is acting out or withdrawing, they are often making a "bid for attention." This episode explores how to recognize these overtures—from casual comments to physical distancing—and how to respond in a way that builds connection. Learn why using your child's own words back to them is a powerful...

Which two US states are shaped like an article of clothing? (Hint: one's a mitten, the other's a boot!) Dr. Roger Smith shares his love for maps, not for navigation, but for connection and curiosity. This episode encourages parents to use maps as a tool to teach children their place in the world, visualize relationships (where relatives live), and learn key features like oceans and mountains. Next...

Do you have family mantras or sayings? Dr. Roger Smith uses the image of a strong pillar to discuss how common language can be used to inspire greatness in your children. This episode encourages parents to explain and utilize colloquialisms (like "pillar of the community") to illustrate concepts of strength and positive influence. Learn the profound impact of speaking to your children as the adult...

Are you aiming at nothing and hitting it every time? Dr. Roger Smith shares a powerful framework, inspired by a biblical verse (Luke 2:52), used by friends to ensure their children experience intentional growth each year. This system involves evaluating and setting goals for your child in four key areas: intellectual (wisdom), physical (stature), spiritual (favor with God), and social (favor with...

When your child is acting out or misbehaving, what is the right response? Dr. Roger Smith clarifies that while children need discipline, it's about much more than just punishment—it's mostly about training. This episode offers essential wisdom on how to respond to misbehavior: Prioritize the Goal: Your motive should always be to help your child grow, not stop them from embarrassing you. Time It Ri...

How do you give individual attention to the hearts of multiple children? Dr. Roger Smith shares a powerful, structured approach to shepherding each child rooted in the Biblical concept of wisdom, stature, and favor with God and man. This tool, developed by friends, guides parents to annually evaluate their child's needs and set goals in four key areas: intellectual, physical, spiritual (character)...

Will your child be famous one day? While no one knows, Dr. Roger Smith argues that parents can foster the capacity for greatness. This episode encourages parents to expand their children's worldview by introducing them to heroes and significant figures through biographies. Learn how shared reading or audiobooks can inspire children to think larger than their current existence and understand the ch...

Feeling overwhelmed by your current number of children? Dr. Roger Smith issues a direct challenge to consider having more, arguing that the true measure of family size shouldn't be based on the temporary difficulty of the early years. He breaks down the common stages—overwhelming with one, dividing and conquering with two, and feeling outnumbered with three—to reveal the moment of relief: when the...

Is happiness just a feeling, or can it be a choice? Dr. Roger Smith shares his family's mantra: "You do not find happiness, you take it with you." This episode explores how to treat happiness as a character trait—a quality independent of your circumstances. Learn how to prepare your children to approach potentially disappointing situations by deciding beforehand to make the best of it. By choosing...

Are you robbing your children of the chance to make decisions? Dr. Roger Smith emphasizes that decisiveness is a critical character trait that must be developed through practice. Using the simple example of choosing between two paths, he explains why parents must intentionally provide opportunities for decision-making—even small ones, like choosing the color of a cup. Learn how to let your childre...

Do you wish your child considered others more often? Dr. Roger Smith defines thoughtfulness as putting other people's needs on the priority list—a desirable trait we can actively help children develop. This episode gives parents two simple, routine exercises: Looking Backward (Bedtime): Ask your child to reflect on their day and identify someone they wish they could have helped or made things bett...

Most children start out self-centered, but generosity is a vital character trait we must intentionally cultivate. Referencing the idea of "audacious generosity," Dr. Roger Smith explains that this concept goes beyond just sharing money—it includes being generous with time, kind words, and possessions. Learn how to model and practice generosity, even with abstract concepts like "sharing," by focusi...

Is your child truly humble, or just self-centered? Dr. Roger Smith redefines humility not as self-deprecation, but as the courage to be authentically known—the good, the bad, and the ordinary. Sitting in his study, Dr. Smith shares how true humility means being "okay with who I am and how I let you know me." Learn how to train your children to be open, vulnerable, and approachable, whether they ar...

Is character something children simply pick up, or must it be explicitly taught? Dr. Roger Smith argues that character is best developed when it's both caught and taught. This episode emphasizes that parents must actively place value on desired traits like trustworthiness or integrity. Learn how to use stories and specific language to define these qualities, and most importantly, how to recognize...