NVC Life with Rachelle Lamb

This episode explores the need for connection and continuity between generations as understood through an Indigenous lens. In it, I read a passage from the book by Rupert Ross titled, Dancing with a Ghost: Exploring Indian Reality (Reed Books of Canada, 1992). Some Rupert Ross quotes:  The more we cover new ground, the more we feel unconnected to either a familiar past or future, then  t...

Depending on where you live, the Day of the Dead is celebrated between Oct 31st and Nov 2nd. This episode explores the ways in which various peoples remember and mourn their dead .. and ends with an acknowledgement that MOURNING is a very important need. 

This episode explores how easily we use the word "feeling" to describe something that is not true feeling. It also explores how we are more likely to ascribe responsibility for our feelings to others than to ourselves. "Nonviolent Communication (NVC) heightens our awareness that what others say and do may be the stimulus , but never the cause of our feelings. We see that our feelings result from h...

Marshall Rosenberg described Nonviolent Communication (NVC), in the simplest terms, as a language to share one's aliveness and to make life more wonderful. In his book, Nonviolent Communication: A Language Of Life, he opens with 2 important questions: 1) What happens to disconnect us from our compassionate nature, leading us to behave violently and exploitatively? 2) What allows some people to sta...

The need for safety is frequently spoken in conversations. But what if the way we seek and understand safety actually interferes with our capacity to authentically relate? This episode examines and challenges the need for safety and references the book Undefended Love co-authored by Jett Psaris and Marlena Lyons (New Harbinger Publications 2000). Here's a quote from the book: "The capacity to sust...

In answer to a question about "judgments", Marshall Rosenberg responded, "I’m all for judgments. I don’t think we could survive very long without them. We judge which foods will give us what our bodies need. We judge which actions are going to meet our needs. But I differentiate between life-serving judgments, which are about our needs, and moralistic judgments that imply rightness or wrongness."...

It's hard to say I'm sorry. And part of what makes it so difficult is the way most people are taught to apologize within a 'right/wrong' framework of thinking that is often shaming and fails to get to the heart of matters. Nonviolent Communication encourages the use of language that identifies real feelings and real needs to help us mourn and deepen both our relationships and our humanity. This ep...

This episode examines our often skewed understanding of needs. If your narrative of the world and what constitutes a ‘good life' is  peddled to you through a human-centric lens, you will almost inevitably view and understand ‘needs' through that same lens. You will devise strategies to meet your needs and the needs of those you care for while paying little heed to the needs of the non-human l...

Dr. Marshall Rosenberg (Nonviolent Communication) believed that one of our most vital needs is the need to contribute to life. Queen Elizabeth's recent death provides an opportunity to reflect on how the Queen served over the 70 year duration of her reign. Whether listeners are against or for monarchy, there's little doubt that Elizabeth II devoted herself to living a life of service. 

This episode offers an excerpt from a live audience workshop prior to the pandemic where 4 ways of alienating communication are described. These are: 1) diagnosis; 2) demand language; 3) denial of personal responsibility, and 4) deserve thinking: punishment and reward. NVC for Adults is the next group learning opportunity starting September 10th: https://www.rachellelamb.com/courses

It's back to school time! This episode looks at education with a focus on the work of education activist, award-winning teacher and author John Taylor-Gatto. Resources: books by John Taylor-Gatto John Taylor Gatto (1935-2018): Remembering America's Most Courageous Teacher by Brittany Hunter "The  premise upon which mass compulsion schooling is based is dead wrong. It  tries to shoehorn e...

This episodes explores "autonomy" and the ways in which autonomy commonly (mis)understood which have consequence for our relationships: Resources: The Course of Love by Alain de Botton Questions to reflect on: If you live in a part of the world where your freedoms are generally respected, what does autonomy mean to you? Do you sometimes confuse autonomy with freedom? Or having a good time? Or thin...

This episode includes a segment of an interview with MarLisa Hollands exploring themes of selfishness, sharing feelings of disappointment and how a parenting couple discusses their Friday evening plans. The full interview can be heard here . 

This episode explores the etymology of the word NEEDS and offers suggestions for how one might speak about the need for love and connection.  Resources: etymological reference

This episode explores needs in the context of Nonviolent Communication .. both the needs of humans and the needs of the ecosystem we depend on. Episode resources: Feelings & Needs list is available here:   Free Communications Tools 8 minute video: Oren Lyons - "We are part of the earth"   The Long-Legged House by Wendell Berry Wendell Berry bio and additional books: Counterpoint Pres...

This episode explores the important human needs for autonomy and belonging. Resources:  The Continuum Concept: Allowing human nature to work successfully by Jean Liedloff Babies , 2010 documentary film The Gods Must Be Crazy , 1980 film

In keeping with the theme of keeping the needs of life central to the conversation, in this episode I share a piece I wrote in 2019 underlining how crucial it is that we consider the needs of ALL life. When we adopt a truly life centered approach to relating, it changes how we engage, for the better! If you have any questions pertaining to either this episode or a relationship challenge, feel free...

In these challenging times, it is vitally important that we take the needs of all life into consideration. In the words of Marshall Rosenberg, "It is hard to separate meeting human needs from the needs of the environment: They are one and the same. Meeting the needs of all the phenomena on the planet. Seeing the oneness of it all. Seeing the beauty in that whole scheme, that whole interdependent s...

How deeply connected are we to life? In what way does Nonviolent Communication support people in becoming more grounded in their lives .. in relationship with each other and also with the world? We belong to a much larger landscape than the relationship landscape we are often so preoccupied with. Join me in this very first episode of NVC Life.