Numinosum Radio

I think he didn’t want to fight with me over something so meaningless. I think he could see there was something wrong with me. I was mad as hell, furious even, and I’d not been starved half to death yet, like he had. People who are starved half to death don’t have much fight in them. Sure, they’ll crush your skull to get at a potato, but when it comes to stupid things like who gets to dig the tren...

A fog approach by ghost and numbers; a fog-induced mopery by half, and half again. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit briancshort.substack.com

What a nice day. That was a nice day. I really liked that day. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit briancshort.substack.com

I could see the only reason this woman’s home above ground had any feeling of life to it at all was because she brought it there. She made it that way, with her own warmth. The muted yellow, I knew also – in the light and the air, as much as the very material of the building – was more densely present down there, below, where little could be seen. It was something beyond life. Up here, at the top,...

As I stood at the kitchen sink with this first woman, helping to either prepare food or wash up after dinner, I became aware of the suffusion of an amber yellow mistiness. This color was subtly permeating everything, as if carried in the air. But more than what I could see of it, there in the kitchen above ground in the woman’s comfortable, if dilapidated squat – the harsh concrete walls held this...

[for VT-Vosim, sine & formant oscillators, ghost atmospherics and air raid siren] This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit briancshort.substack.com

52°28'43.5"N 13°24'29.7"E This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit briancshort.substack.com

The way that I moved myself around, and very quickly, was by a combination of being able to fly, but countering this upward tendency with a deadweight ball that I would thrust in front of me, so that its momentum would carry me forward a great distance, and then back to earth. I could travel really fast this way, and it was kind of fun. I didn’t need a car or anything else. After wandering aimless...

The seven dead are all my friends, while the other four go free. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit briancshort.substack.com

Sometimes a man or a woman is made to hear the dead, and to reconnect the dead with the living, if for a moment, if by use of their own bodies, if only with their speech. No one else will do it; no one has the time, or the ability, or even suspects it needs to be done. It is simply this person’s lot, as it turns out. Of course, this makes this person appear to be insane, and naturally they are ins...

Persons whom occlude will be pressed up to the... This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit briancshort.substack.com

Sorry. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit briancshort.substack.com

When this other part of yourself – this other, deeper, much older part of yourself (I won’t call it wiser , because its wisdom does not relate to this world at all, but to that of the dead) – looks up and up and through its depth of time toward the self, this “person” so-called, who walks the earth, and sees how much of yourself you’ve spent distracted with empty longing, longing after somebody, s...

“No!” he all but shouted, then shrunk back into himself as he realized that people had turned to look. “No, it’s not that,” he said more quietly, clutching at the table, “it’s just… I didn’t think I would have one. And I don’t think that’s what he was.” “Silly. Ev-er-y-bo-dy has one. This is the new way.” “No. No, not my double. I mean…” He shook his head. “They’re always somewhere,” Lily told him...

Something buried deep in memory; I hadn’t even known I’d known it, until finally one morning I remembered… This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit briancshort.substack.com

Sometimes I just can’t. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit briancshort.substack.com

This is dedicated to the stony stone-froze fox face of the Berlin urban fox. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit briancshort.substack.com

City Hall of The Hague, Netherlands is located at 52°04'39.5"N 4°19'00.8”E. Central to its modernist style is a vast atrium, several stories high, which, though designed by an American, typifies a mode of contemporary Dutch architecture that is self-conscious in its use of interior space and dramatic contrast in scale. The atrium is in effect its own ecosystem, though one of bureaucracy, waiting,...

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” This is a quote posted widely across social media and attributed to Carl Gustav Jung – bespectacled, an impish, wise grin, old man wisdom smoking his old man wisdom pipe and looking quite approachable – though the quote is frustratingly never given with any direct citation to any of his Collected Works....

Overhead overview, a public space, immediately south of Holland Spoor rail station, Den Haag, Netherlands, a given spring evening of the year 2019 – warm air, birds; foot, bicycle and scooter traffic; birds – abutting the campus of De Haagse Hogeschool (The Hague University of Applied Sciences); birds. The birds in perpetual motion – every bird, each a continuing the movement of the last, each bir...

Did that mean that it was real? The temptation to believe as much is strong. But looked at more carefully, it appears still another potential trap that I could easily be caught in, and therefore defeat further development, deciding it must be so. No less a trap is the concomitant impulse toward disbelief – to say that this was nothing but my fantasy, supplied with enough apparent evidence to convi...

From trauma is made the floating body or self. When she leaves her body, it is the floating self who arrives at places or in words. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit briancshort.substack.com

The thing in itself seems rather straightforward; it is what it is. Yet I still had the sense that there was something more to it: wasn’t there a language being constructed? A very personal language, perhaps, constructed out of scraps of my own life story, and interspersed, or highlighted, by these moments in which another mind would appear and make comment upon it. The comment would always be thu...

We are people when we are here. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit briancshort.substack.com

“I think of myself as… walking to the chair and being set inside it. Emotionally, I’m very dissociated. It’s like I’m just kind of meat, I’m just led to… the chair… and sit myself in it, because I know that’s what I should do. I’ve been in this situation before. I know that… this room isn’t a real room. Like it’s based on associations… It’s constructed for me to see it this way.” This is a public...