Number One With A Bullet

At this time last year, the world was a scary place. This podcast was just a twinkle in Andrew and Dan's collective eye. People wandered the streets, lost, alone, and afraid. Then, a Canadian messiah came down from the frozen north and dictated God's very Plan. People liked it so much that it went to number one on the Billboard chart! The end. (Please listen to the episode for the real story).

After some contentious off-mic conversation, Andrew and Dan decide to take their very bad energy into a discussion of an iconic song about happiness. Originally a surf-rock band turned Byrds rip-off group, The Turtles had a long career of not really know what they were doing and getting screwed over by their managers. Will these podcast hosts be able to escape a similar fate? We sure hope so.

In the early 1970s, just as the sound of Philly Soul was sweeping the nation, a little trio by the name of The O'Jays captured America's heart with a little song about how cool trains are. Decades later, people still can't get enough of what is most often referred to as "the Coors Light song." Listen to this episode and find out why! Also, Woodstock 50 is happening for some ungodly reason and Andr...

While the world was awash in the positivity of the mid-1990s, an extraterrestrial named Ace from the planet Base paid a visit to this little blue marble, bringing with him the funky, electronic sounds of his computer-aided techno. For more very true facts about this number one hit single (as well as an oral history of Norwegian death metal) listen to this dang episode!

Long before their brother Mark got famous for hitting all those massive dingers, the McGuire Sisters weaseled their way to number one by covering a bunch of a songs originally written and performed by black R&B and doo-wop groups. Can you tell that the person writing this description is annoyed by this? Wait until you hear the episode!

How hard is it to write a chart-topping dance track? If you were to ask Cher and her team of meticulous producers, they'd say very freaking hard. This week, Andrew and Dan look back at this late-90s club banger that was many years in the making. Does it stand the test of time? Will this be your hosts new Number One? Listen to find out!

It's taken awhile for Madge to finally show up on this podcast, and unfortunately her debut episode is focused on a bit of a dud from a weird transitional period in her career. Regardless of our feelings in 2018, "Take A Bow" sat in the number one spot for seven weeks back in the mid-90s when America decided they were done with overtly sexual Madonna and would rather have a bland R&B-infused versi...

It's the official Number One With A Bullet Oscar Spectacular! What exactly does that mean? Well, Andrew and Dan talk about movies and potential Oscar winners for the first 15 minutes of this episode before begrudgingly addressing the Dark Horse in the room. If you're a fan of Santa Barbara's own Katy Perry, we're sorry this episode is about her most popular mediocre song about a spooky witch!

In celebration of Valentine's Day, the year's horniest holiday, Andrew and Dan spend some time with the music industry's premiere horny man: Barry White. Before he ever scored a number one hit under his own name, Mr. White peaked on the charts with this arrangement performed by his personal 40-piece orchestra. It may not have any lyrics, but it's the perfect song to do a smooch to! 

This week, Andrew and Dan travel back to a more innocent time when infidelity and gaslighting could be celebrated at the top of the music charts and America had no idea 9/11 was right around the corner. Topics discussed in this very episode include: Dan's teenage horniness, the pervasiveness of Shaggy memes, and the bonkers music video for this very weird song.

We made it to the '90s baby! And upon our arrival we were greeted by a not very good song! Oklahoma City's own Color Me Badd topped the charts for the third and final time this week in 1992. Join Andrew and Dan as they say hello and goodbye to these very weird, bright shirted boys. Also, if you're a messy bitch who lives for drama, stick around until the end!

The early 60s was wild time. That's the best defense we have for the fact that this gross-ass song was a number one hit in the year 1963. Steve Lawrence laid down what can only be described as a "pedophile's anthem" and America responded with a resounding, "Yes, please, more, thank you!" Hear Andrew and Dan contend with this nastiness as best they can, plus a direct impeachment of one Ringo Starr!

Let us take you back to a time when orchestral pop songs could reach number one on the charts. When a significant portion of America could hear the score to a movie and think, "I'd like to hear this song without the images please." That's the kind of world in which Bert Kaempfert (and his orchestra!) became an international star. Also, we talk about the Beatles. You'll hear why.

You've heard what the "official" list has to say. Now it's time to listen to two grown men play music at each other and nod appreciatively! That's right. It's time for Andrew and Dan to share their top ten albums of 2018. As a bonus, you get to hear two people get increasingly more tired as they realize they've been recording podcasts for upwards of five hours. It's all good fun though! And good m...

Move aside Frank Sinatra! There's another artist who has heard of the famous city of New York and has a few things to say about it. This week, Andrew and Dan take a look back at Jay-Z's first number one single as a lead artist in which he name checks some little-known NYC landmarks like the Statue of Liberty and Madison Square Garden! Thankfully Alicia Keys is also here to do some good work.

Children, sit down. It's time we had "the talk." When a man loves a stripper very much, he gets together with a world famous rapper and records an R&B/Rap ballad describing all the ways in which he'd like to have intercourse with her. If he's lucky, that song becomes a number one hit! At least, that's how it happened for Akon, before he decided to leave sex behind and save the world. 

Things were different in the 1940s. People were more polite. You said "Hi" to your neighbors. And everybody, we mean everybody, had an orchestra. At least that's the gist we got from this week's research into Francis Craigs Nashville hit, "Near You." Also discussed, The Very Grinch, the lameness of Sirius XM's College Radio station ID, and an updated weather report from both sides of the country!

Quick! Name the biggest song of the 1970s. Well, you're wrong! It turns out the biggest song that decade was a love ballad from an unpopular movie sung by the daughter of an ultra-conservative country singer. But that's really just scratching the surface on this bizarrely massive number one hit.

What happens when you take the two hottest R&B producers of the time and stick them with a very white synthpop band in the midst of a creative slump? A number one single, apparently. This week, Andrew and Dan discuss Human League's 1986 hit "Human," which at least one of them thinks is the musical equivalent of mayonnaise. Also, Andrew treats listeners to more tales from Chicago public transit!

Now that the rain is gone, Andrew and Dan can see clearly that the song they're discussing this week is Johnny Nash's lone hit "I Can See Clearly Now." No, that's not a typo in the previous sentence. The man's name is Johnny Nash. This week, we dig deep on this mysterious one-hit-wonder who maybe have left more of a lasting impression on the music industry than you would have thought. Also discuss...

Welcome to the Year Of Usher! Fourteen years ago this six-pack wielding R&B adonis had more weeks on the top of the charts than should be legally allowed. This week, Andrew and Dan unpack the belated Halloween hit "My Boo!" which is an ode to high school girlfriends that taught you how to smooch. Travel back with us to a time when Petey Pablo was a name people recognized!

Get your mouth trumpets tuned up because it's time to roll back the calendar once again to a time period before music was really music. In 1944, a group of brothers recorded just another in a long string of hits for their chart-topping vocal group. "You Always Hurt The One You Love" may not have been very memorable for the Mills Brothers themselves, but Andrew and Dan sure know a lot about it now....

This absolute banger from 1983 coincidentally lends some spooky atmosphere to Andrew and Dan's first ever Halloween episode. With a completely whack-a-doo music video, a vampiric musical theater origin story, and a little help from Meatloaf's buddy Jim Steinman, this song is guaranteed to get you into the Halloween spirit. Don't get too spooked!

When you talk about the 1950s vocal group The Drifters, you have to be very specific about which Drifters you mean. The group that formed around Clyde McPhatter and later helped launched the career of Ben E. King had an ever changing lineup and a history of mixed success. But this 1960 number one single secured their place in America's heart for at least a few weeks. Over half a century later, how...

Oh boy, this is a doozy. Kanye West is a complex figure in pop culture, but this week Andrew and Dan travel back to a time before Twitter when Kanye was just an unstoppable hit machine. With a little help from Jamie Foxx, this single off Kanye's second studio album dominated the charts for a good chunk of 2005. Of course, no discussion of Kanye is without controversy and we get into it (so to spea...