Neurodiverse Love with Mona Kay

On this episode of the podcast, AANE certified therapist, Daniel Dashnaw, from Couples Therapy, Inc. provides important information about how the stories and narratives we create, impact our neurodiverse relationships and our nervous systems.  He also addresses how partners may experience a polarity in emotional styles that can lead to a clash around the stories both partners "tell" themselve...

Welcome to Episode 1 of Season 4 of the Neurodiverse Love podcast.  During this season, Mona will focus on a series of in-depth conversations with AANE certified therapists and coaches.  Mona is partnering with AANE and the Director of the Peter M. Friedman-Neurodiverse Couples Institute, Grace Myhill, so that more neurodiverse couples, and individuals in neurodiverse relationships, will...

During Season 4 of the Neurodiverse Love podcast Mona is partnering with AANE.  She will be interviewing many of the therapists and coaches that have completed the AANE "Neurology Matters" training and certification through the AANE Peter M. Friedman Neurodiverse Couples Institute.  We hope you enjoy hearing from therapists and coaches in the US and Europe who are helping neurodiverse couples incr...

Mona is going solo for the last episode of Season 3 to introduce "The Neurodiverse Love Relationship G.P.S. (Gaining Perspective for Success)"; Most of us use a GPS in our cars to help us get to our desired destinations.  However, even though we may know where we are headed, there may be traffic jams,  constructions zones, or accidents, that prevent us from getting to our destination on time, and...

Dr. Theresa Regan is a neuropsychologist who has extensive experience working with autistic individuals and neurodiverse couples and she has been trained to work with adolescents, adults and aging adults.  During this episode she shares both her personal and professional experiences to help us better understand how to navigate the different seasons of a "Neurodiverse Love" relationship. The t...

On this episode of the podcast, Mona is joined by one of her best friends, Michelle.  They both share some of the experiences they have had with men they met on various dating apps who may have been neurodivergent.  A recent article in Psychology Today titled "The Rise of Lonely, Single Men. Men Need to Address Their Deficits to Meet Healthier Relationship Expectations", by Greg Matos, P...

During this episode you will hear a little about the beautiful love story between Jennifer Cook and Brett Banks.  Jennifer Cook was identified as being on the spectrum in 2011.  She is the author of 9 bestselling books, the on-camera autistic expert in Netflix's Emmy-nominated series, "Love on the Spectrum-US" and has given presentations at the White House, the National Institute of Heal...

During this episode, Mona and Larry Siegel have an in-depth conversation about ways to better understand and communicate more effectively with your partner about sexual needs and desires. Larry is a Clinical Sexologist and Certified Sexuality Educator and Supervisor, who has been working in this field for over 35 years.  He is also the co-host of the YouTube show called "Sex Talk with the Sie...

During this episode, Mona talks with Charles, who is a social worker who works in the field of alcohol and substance use.  Charles is 27 years old and recently discovered that he is autistic. He shared that he calls himself an "intuitive autistic" and talks about how those gifts and talents help him better understand the clients with whom he works. Charles also talks about how his life m...

Mona joined Natalie Roberts and Heather Parks from the Loving Difference Online Community on their "Myth-busting" podcast to bust some myths we may have all experienced in our neurodiverse relationships.  During this episode we discuss debunking the following myths: 1) We don't just have to "survive", we can "thrive" in our current relationship, (or choose to move on and create a life in whic...

Cheryl Rhodes has been an LMFT for almost 40 years and has spent many years working with families with autistic children and neurodiverse couples. During this episode, she talks openly about her neurodiverse family (her daughter is autistic) and how critical it is for us to understand the history of the term “Neurodiversity” and to focus on both the strengths and differences in everyone...and she...

Dr. Jill Corvelli has created "The Corvelli ND Compass", and she talks about how this model guides her work with neurodiverse couples, as well as how she is using the “Compass” to help neurodiverse couples better understand how they both navigate through time and space.  The model focuses on three core components and each is critical to moving from misunderstanding and challenges, to understa...

Jen Malia is an author, professor, autism advocate, wife and mom who received her autism diagnosis on the same day as her daughter.   She writes about this experience in her New York Times article .  Jen shares openly how challenging it was for her to get diagnosed and unfortunately, so many other autistic women will probably relate to her story.  Jen had done lots of research,...

During this episode,  Mona talks with Life Coach-Robin Tate.  Robin shares how important it is for her to continuously compliment the successes and strengths of the neurodiverse couples she works with and to remind both partners how their brains are "equal and different". She also discusses communication differences and the importance of addressing "perspective taking" during arguments a...

This is another fantastic episode for both partners in a Neurodiverse Love relationship to listen to.  After 40 years of research, John and Julie Gottman have helped thousands of couples better understand each other and implement tools and strategies that can help them move from surviving to thriving.  During this episode, we talk with Dr. Michael McNulty, a certified Gottman Therapist a...

During this episode Matthew shares a little bit about his career in writing and the work he is doing in film and tv.  In addition, he talks about the path he took to get an autism diagnosis in his 40's.  He shares how his literal communication style has been both a strength and a challenge in his relationships and why his doctor once called him an "extrapolation engine".  Matthew is...

Moshe and Tobi didn't know that Tobi was autistic when they first met and they couldn't make sense of some of the challenges they were experiencing in their marriage.  While still newlyweds, Tobi has been officially diagnosed and they are now expecting their first baby this month.  During this episode, this loving couple talk about how Tobi's diagnosis has changed everything for the bett...

This is another fantastic episode for both partners in a Neurodiverse Love relationship to listen to together.  Dr. K. is a Board Certified Gottman Therapist and talks about the importance of knowing that Dr. John Gottman's research has shown that 69% of our challenges in romantic relationships are due to things that won't change.  However, understanding ourselves and our partners better...

During this fantastic episode, Mona has an opportunity to talk to two amazing researchers who are in the UK doing groundbreaking work to better understand autistic adults intimate lives.  Monique Huysamen and Marianthi Kourti share some of the findings from their phenomenal qualitative research study that is focused on learning what autistic adults want and need in their intimate lives. &nbsp...

Candice and Chris have a special, deep love for each other and couldn't understand why they kept having SO many communication challenges and misunderstandings in their relationship.  As Candice began to get feedback from Chris and her colleagues, she realized that she needed a way to communicate better.  Based on a look back at some of her past and current challenges she began to suspect...

Many of us would love to turn our special interests or passion into paid employment, however that isn't always possible.  During this episode, Mona, Heather and Natalie talk about the challenges they experienced in school and employment and how they have worked to create ways to use their gifts and talents through paid employment, volunteering or hobbies.  They also share some of the cha...

This is another fantastic episode that neurodiverse couples may want to listen to together!   Stephanie and Dan Holmes have known each other since they were 10 and have been married almost 30 years. After their daughter was diagnosed with Asperger's in the mid-2000’s, Stephanie read about adults on the spectrum and realized that her husband was autistic too (he already suspected he was)....

If you haven't read "The Autism Relationship Handbook and The Autism Relationship Workbook by Joe Biel and Dr. Faith Harper" you will definitely want to order copies of both after this episode.  Joe is the founder of Microcosm Publishing in Oregon and Faith is a therapist is Texas.  Working together for a number of years, they have partnered on several books and even have the same birthd...

During this episode Mona and Manecia talk about a topic that may be difficult for both the autistic and non-autistic partners to hear, but is important to address, because it is something that has happened in both of their relationships (and may be happening in yours). No one wants to feel like they have to parent their partner, however acknowledging that this may be happening and talking about wa...

During this short bonus episode of the podcast, Mona shares “WHY” she created the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards,  “HOW” they can be used so that each partner can feel safe to share their needs and wants, and “WHAT” can be achieved when both partners come from a place of grace and compassion. Mona's parents were in a Neurodiverse Love marriage for over 40 years and never knew.  In addition,...