Myths Your Teacher Hated Podcast

This week on MYTH, we're covering a super-old story because you asked for it.  You'll learn that greed is bad, that even the Greeks stole some of their stories, and that some underworlds just aren't as nice as others.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll meet a snake-monster that was the wind beneath the hydra's wings.

This week on MYTH, we'll make our first foray into Korea.  You'll learn why rabbits don't like to swim, why you should never accept a ride from a talking turtle, and why you can't use fake eyes in medicine.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll meet a tricky spirit with a love of games and a great big magic stick.

This week on MYTH, it's time to kill a god.  Well, sort of. You'll learn that some gods have massive wood, that Osiris probably has claustrophobia, and that zombie sex is the best.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll meet the angry monkey who uses his penis in creative ways.

This week on MYTH, we'll hop a magic carpet ride to a whole new world.  You'll learn that not all genies are created equal, that long-lost relatives are not to be trusted, and that sometimes being bad can get you everything you want.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll go giant bird watching.

This week on MYTH, we'll travel to the old kingdom of Hindustan for one of the stupidest couple fights ever.  You'll find out that jackals and tigers sound a lot alike, that gemstones come from surprising places, and that the gallows is a bad place to meet women.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll look for bigfoot in the wilds of Pakistan.

This week on MYTH, we'll discover a cure for blindness in the jungles of Brazil.  You'll discover that random old strangers give the best advice, that giving spoiled teens a lot of money is a stupid idea, and that some dangers never really materialize.  Then, in a listener-suggestion Gods and Monsters, we'll discover the secrets of the dancing dust devils.

This week on MYTH, we're finally going to resolve all of the loose threads in this tangled story.  This is the ninth and final episode in our telling of the classic French tale, Beauty and the Beast.  You'll see that no one is ever truly gone, that turning into a snake is apparently super scary, and that no one should be surprised that queens are classist.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll meet t...

This week on MYTH, Belle is going to play some high-stakes hide and seek.  This is the eighth episode in our telling of the classic French tale, Beauty and the Beast.  You'll learn why you should always believe in your dreams, that bowls hold water better than your hands, and that love is really, really complicated.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll head up into the Alps to hunt a mysterious goat...

This week on MYTH, Belle's spending the summer in the big city.  This is the seventh episode in our telling of the classic French tale, Beauty and the Beast.  You'll see that you can totally go home again, that sibling rivalry never dies, and that young, pretty men are assholes.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, you'll meet the black cat who'll either kill you or make you rich.

This week on MYTH, we'll discover a whole new world of invasion of privacy.  This is the sixth episode in our telling of the classic French tale, Beauty and the Beast.  You'll see that questions can be dangerous, that peeping isn't creepy if you're rich, and that mirrors can totally reflect sound over hundreds of miles.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, it's time to meet a scarier tabletop monster than...

This week on MYTH, we'll get to see a little more of this magical prison.  This is the fifth episode in our telling of the classic French tale, Beauty and the Beast.  You'll discover why you need a monkey butler, that parrots can outshine Pavarotti, and that the direct approach isn't always the best.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, you'll learn why it pays to be courteous to strange white ladies in t...

This week on MYTH, we'll finish our aside with the Queen and the Fairy and we'll meet up with Belle as she sacrifices herself.  This is the fourth episode in our telling of the classic French tale, Beauty and the Beast. You'll learn that it's rude to call someone ugly, that executions can be festive, and that you should learn to pack light.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll meet a pair of horribl...

This week on MYTH, we're going to travel deep into fairy country.  This is the third episode in our telling of the classic French tale, Beauty and the Beast.  You'll learn that you should never trust ugly people, that badass warrior queens can have tender sides, and that you can learn everything you need to know from a library and a fairy.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, you'll meet a deadly water-br...

This week on MYTH, we'll learn what horrid fate lies in store for the merchant confronted with the horrible Beast.  This is the second episode in our telling of the classic French tale, Beauty and the Beast. You'll learn that the Beast is something of a stickler for etiquette, that consent matters even to monsters, and that no one can hate you quite like your own sibling.  Then, in Gods and Monste...

This week on MYTH, it's time to ruin another Disney classic with a peek behind the scenes.  This is the first episode in our telling of the classic French tale, Beauty and the Beast. You'll learn that Disney skipped over an absurd amount of backstory, that finders keepers doesn't apply to real estate, and that you should really have homeowners insurance.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll discover...

This week on MYTH, it's off to jolly old England for a classical tale of knights and dragons.  You'll see that you should never kidnap a cat, that even Satan has favorite pets, and that cleverness can keep you out of Hell.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll meet the ghostly apparition of a long dead army.

This week on MYTH, we'll travel to ancient Japan.  You'll learn that your sibling rivalry could be a lot worse, that trickery is always the best solution, and that even the sun sometimes needs a good pout.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, you'll learn why you should never let a pig run between your legs.

This week on MYTH, it's time for an island vacation.  You'll learn that cucumbers can make babies, that the Green Giant is a terrible mascot, and that spicy food can be a lifesaver.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll meet a Balinese floating head monster that hunts babies.

This week on MYTH, it's time for you to unwrap our holiday gift to you because it's our annual winter holiday special.  You'll see that brave little girls make the best heroes, that squirrel tails will make you sneeze, and that even Father Christmas has to worry about worker uprisings.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, you'll discover why you really, really want a new pair of socks for Christmas.

This week on MYTH, we're going to vacation in sunny Mexico.  You'll hear me struggle with yet more intimidatingly difficult names, you'll learn that hummingbirds are badasses, and you'll discover that a flaming snake-spear might be the most metal god weapon ever.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, you'll discover why you should never trust a creepy dude who serenades random women by moonlight.

This week on MYTH, we're off to the African savannah for a lion hunt.  You'll learn that just because you're paranoid, it doesn't mean you're wrong, that using children as bait is a fantastic idea, and that lions aren't supposed to own cows.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll go under the sea to meet an ancient African mermaid who's not nearly as friendly as Ariel.

This week on MYTH, we'll catch a magic carpet ride for some ancient Persian cities, some of which still exist.  You'll learn that even the ancients had filters on their pictures, that it's better to be lucky than good, and that sometimes the characters in old stories can actually be good people.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, it's the demonic duo that wants to lasso your soul for being naughty.

For anyone who couldn't attend, I've finally had time to upload the audio from the Mythology in Popular Culture panel at DragonCon 2018.  This was recorded live, so I apologize for any issues.

This week on MYTH, we're headed down to Tennessee for a real life ghost story.  You'll see that just because a poltergeist is hellbent on your death, that doesn't mean it can't also be helpful, that ghosts can get wasted, and that you should never get into bed with the ghost of a witch.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, we'll drive over to West Virginia to meet the mysterious flying monster that might...

This week on MYTH, we're headed to Wales for a little Disney inspiration.  You'll learn that you can't out magic a witch, that it's hard to find good help, and that bards can be badasses.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, you'll learn that not all doggos are friendly.