Myths Your Teacher Hated Podcast

Aloha!  This week on MYTH, I'm headed to sunny Hawaii for vacation in honor of one year of podcasting, so I figured it would be the perfect time to do another episode on the trickster god, Maui.  In this episode, you'll see that little kids shouldn't be in charge of naming creation, that eels are creepy bastards, and that fish make great landscaping.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, it's the evil spir...

This week on MYTH, it's back to Mother Russia for the third and final part of the story cycle begun by Bulat the Brave Companion.  In this episode, you'll learn that Adventure Time's Ice King is way creepier than you thought, that Bulat has a ridiculous amount of restraint, and that eggs can be very harmful to your health.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, Froggy went a courtin' and he did ride, and th...

This week on MYTH, we'll probe deeper into Russian folklore with a continuation of the Prince Ivan stories.  In this episode, you'll learn that birds make the best brother-in laws, that magical horses can be smartasses, and that Xena was not the first warrior princess.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, it's the black-winged demon that haunted many childhood nightmares.  

This week on MYTH, we'll be trying to beat the summer heat (depending on when and where you listen to this episode) with a trip to wintry Russia.  In this episode, you'll learn that contracts signed under torture are binding, that it's totally fair to go all emo over a lost arrow, and that murder is a valid alternative to divorce.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, it's the hairy kindergartner who might...

This week on MYTH, we're heading to the Emerald Isle for one of the biggest baddies we've seen so far.   In this episode, you'll discover that if you're not careful you're face will freeze that way, that sometimes he really did just lose your number, and that Celtic names are complicated to pronounce.   Then, in Gods and Monsters, it's the sexy, redheaded seductress who'll give you everlasting fam...

This week on MYTH, it's time to head down under for a story from the Australian Aborigines.   In this episode, you'll learn that creepy caves are always bad, that bones can be magical, and that some parents will go to serious extremes for their kids.   Then, in Gods and Monsters, it's a very good reason to be afraid of fig trees. 

This week on MYTH, we'll be trekking through the jungles of South America for two ancient animal myths.   In this episode, you'll learn that teenage skunks are just as arrogant as teenage humans, that the Mayans could be brutal as hell, and that anything can be fixed by a monkey with a guitar.   Then, in Gods and Monsters, it's the weirdest were-animal missing a body part that you've ever seen. 

This week on MYTH, we'll be heading into the brothels of ancient India.   In this episode, you'll learn how to impress the country's most beautiful woman, why losing body parts can be holy, and that bleeding out in a graveyard is just as terrifying as you'd think.   Then, in Gods and Monsters, it's a kinky goddess who likes to drink her own blood while watching couples fornicate. 

This week on MYTH, we'll be looking for a little sympathy for the devil from a Grimm fairy tale.   In this episode, you'll learn that making a deal with the devil is absolutely a good idea, that Hans is the original Pretty Woman, and what is in hell broth.   Then, in Gods and Monsters, it's the most stylish version of the devil this side of Hollywood. 

This week on MYTH, we'll be diving (pun intended) into the world of Hans Christian Andersen's The Little Mermaid, which was, unsurprisingly, the inspiration for the Disney musical of the same name.   This is the third and final episode in out 3-episode series called "Disney Lied to Me,", where I take a famous Disney musical and ruin it by telling you the bloodthirsty, torture filled, and rapey sto...

This week on MYTH, we'll meet a sleeping beauty who finds that waiting for your prince can cause a lot of problems.  This is the second episode in our 3-episode series called "Disney Lied to Me," where I'll be taking a famous Disney musical and ruining it by telling you the sexual, blood-soaked story behind the singing animals.  In this episode, you'll learn that Prince Charming was a dick, that t...

This week on MYTH, it's a Polynesian demigod with a big fishhook and a bigger ego.  This is the first episode in our 3-episode series called "Disney Lied to Me," where I'll be taking a famous Disney musical and ruining it by telling you the sexual, blood-soaked story behind the singing animals.  In this episode, you'll discover that casting your infant into the sea can give them magic powers, that...

This week on MYTH, it's a Jewish story that you won't find in the Torah.  In this episode, you'll discover how you can be raped by a ghost, why you should never doubt Moses, and that Sam Raimi might have been inspired by medieval Judaism.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, it's the archangel of death responsible for the slaughter of countless children. 

This week on MYTH, we're finally leaving behind the long-winded, zany antics of the Monkey King.  We'll be journeying to an entirely new mythos for this week's story.  This is the story of the Prince and the Sphinx from Egyptian mythology.  The original story actually comes from the prince in question, and is one of the few stories with a definitive historical context.  In this episode, you'll lea...

This week on MYTH, we'll at last reach the end of our 14 year journey to Vulture Peak in mythical India, which bears only a passing resemblance to the real India..  This is the seventh and final episode on the epic tale of Sun Wukong, the Monkey King.  If you haven't heard the first six parts, I'd recommend going back and listening. The first episode provides a lot of back story on the Monkey King...

This week on MYTH, we'll continue Monkey's epic journey to the west to retrieve Indian magic.  The story is slowly nearing it's conclusion after our break for a very special Valentine's Day.  This is the fifth episode on the epic tale of Sun Wukong, the Monkey King.  If you haven't heard the first four parts, I'd recommend going back and listening.  The first episode provides a lot of back story o...

This week on MYTH, we'll continue Monkey's epic journey to the west to retrieve Indian magic.  The story is slowly nearing it's conclusion after our break for a very special Valentine's Day.  This is the fifth episode on the epic tale of Sun Wukong, the Monkey King.  If you haven't heard the first four parts, I'd recommend going back and listening.  The first episode provides a lot of back story o...

This week on MYTH, it's one of the world's first chick flick stories.  After listening to the Falling in Love Montage podcast, I'm pretty sure this story hits a lot of the standard tropes.  You'll meet the archetype for the bitchy mother in law, hear why it might be a good idea to feed the ants once in a while, and learn that true love cannot be denied (at least if you have the right gods on your...

This week on MYTH, we'll continue Monkey's epic journey to the west to retrieve Indian magic.  This is the fourth episode on the epic tale of Sun Wukong, the Monkey King.  If you haven't heard the first three parts, I'd recommend going back and listening.  The first episode provides a lot of back story on the Monkey King and on the chinese cosmology, the second tells how this whole quest thing got...

This week on MYTH, we'll continue Monkey's epic journey to the west to retrieve Indian magic.  This is the third episode on the epic tale of Sun Wukong, the Monkey King.  If you haven't heard the first two parts, I'd recommend going back and listening.  The first episode provides a lot of back story on the Monkey King and on the chinese cosmology, and the second is the beginning of the current sto...

This week on MYTH, we'll begin Monkey's epic journey to the west to retrieve Indian magic.  This is the second episode on the epic tale of Sun Wukong, the Monkey King.  If you haven't heard the first part, I'd recommend going back and listening.  It's not strictly necessary to understand this week's story, but it provides a lot of back story on the characters which will be helpful. In this episode...

This week on MYTH, we'll be staying in the far east for the beginning of one of the most famous epics.  I'm really excited about this one! It's Episode 6A, Who's Your God Now? We'll be diving into the epic story of the Monkey King from Chinese mythology for several episodes. This week, it's Monkey's origin story (because he's basically the world's first superhero) and the tale of how he went from...

This week on MYTH, we're headed to the Far East for a pair of folktales from Japan.  Both stories heavily feature the peony, but they take very different paths.  The first is the tale of a lonely girl in feudal Japan.  She is to be married to a man she's never met and she's not sure how she feels about it.  The second story is about a rich, drunken frat boy of a samurai who falls in love with a be...

This week on MYTH, it's a story near and dear to my heart; it's the Norse account of the invention of beer.  It's everything you'd expect a Viking story about alcohol to be! It has Odin being a sneaky dick (because sky gods are assholes), Thor doing a bad job of being sneaky, and fights with giant sea monsters.  If you saw the Marvel movies and wondered if Thor could really be that much of a meath...

It's Halloween, so it's time for the creepy legend of the Lost Colony of Roanoke Island.  This is a weird story that pops up a lot in popular culture (everywhere from Spawn Comics to Supernatural to American Horror Story), so this week we'll be getting in to what happened leading up to the colony's disappearance and the stories about what happened.  Then, in Gods and Monsters, it's the story of th...