Middle Fingers Up

Ever feel guilty for not feeling festive? The holidays are sold as sparkle and joy — and honestly, it starts in August the moment the gingerbread hits store shelves. The holiday decor floods every aisle... But for many of us, what follows isn’t joy. It’s guilt — spiraling that we’re falling behind and it’s only mid-summer — overstimulation, pressure to spend, perform, and somehow stay grateful whi...

This one made me laugh, pause, and think. I get to sit down and really get to know Calgary comedian and Planet Jerf host Jeff D'Silva—the stories behind his humor, how he sees the world, and the experiences that shaped him. We talk about biracial parenting, Calgary mall culture, and what it was like growing up Pakistani-Canadian in the 80s. I first came across Jeff after hearing his viral Sou...

 Have you ever asked yourself why so many of us first-gens ended up dating or marrying white people? I have!  I see now that our immigrant parents’ survival strategies — keeping your head down, working hard, staying small — shaped ours. And for our generation, that survival often meant assimilation, performing the “white version” of ourselves — at work, in friendships, even in love. In this intima...

Hey everyone, quick question — when was the last time you really talked about periods? Not whispered, not joked about… I mean honest, open, real talk. If that made you pause, this one’s for you — and for the men in our lives too: dads, brothers, partners, sons… anyone who wants to understand better. Dr. Anne  invited me to sit down with her as part of her month-long speaker series celebrating her...

You ever meet someone who reminds you that healing doesn’t always happen in therapy — sometimes it happens in the kitchen? In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, Kiran Randhawa sits down with Bengali home cook, mother, and storyteller Shuraya Bhatti, whose journey from grief to growth will make you rethink what it means to take care of yourself. After losing her father, Shuraya turned to food — not...

Join Kiran Randhawa as she sits down with Mano Mishra, a community leader, yoga teacher, and advocate for women’s health and immigrant voices. Mano shares her journey from Uttar Pradesh, India, to building a new life in Calgary—facing isolation, career setbacks, and the challenges of starting over. Through her story, Mano reveals how volunteering, yoga, and a commitment to kindness helped her over...

In this episode of Middle Fingers Up , host Kiran Randhawa sits down with community consultant, speaker, and Catalyst podcast host Nike Aurea for a deep dive into what it truly means to build and belong in community—beyond convenience and into real responsibility. As a first-generation daughter of West African immigrants, Nike shares how her upbringing in Atlanta shaped her unapologetic approach t...

Join host Kiran Randhawa on Middle Fingers Up for a heartfelt conversation with Shagun Sharma, registered psychotherapist and founder of Lotus Pathways. In this episode, Shagun shares her journey from a curious six-year-old in downtown Toronto's Cabbagetown neighborhood—where she first witnessed the realities of homelessness and mental health struggles—to becoming a trailblazer in culturally...

In this episode of Middle Fingers Up , host Kiran Randhawa sits down with Kam Bassier—fitness and life coach, father, husband, and self-proclaimed student of life—to unpack the emotional and physical toll of burnout and the radical power of rest. Kam’s story begins in Guyana, shaped by intergenerational trauma, hustle culture, and the immigrant grind. But what makes this conversation unforgettable...

In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, host Kiran Randhawa sits down with multi-award-winning author and speaker Kalyani Pardeshi to unpack the hidden layers of self-bullying, inner critics, and the emotional legacy of growing up in immigrant households. From confronting toxic family dynamics to redefining success and self-worth, Kalyani shares raw, relatable stories and transformative insights tha...

This isn’t just another parenting conversation. It’s a raw, honest look at what happens when the triggers of childhood meet the triggers of parenting. In this episode, I sit down with Shuraya Akhter Bhatti—a Bengali home cook, curry class entertainer, and soulful storyteller with a gift for making the hard stuff human. Through the beautiful metaphor of a tiffin, we unpack the emotional layers we a...

"At Least It’s Not Worse…” — Why We Rush Gratitude and Skip Our Feelings We’ve all done it. Someone shares they’re struggling, and we say:“Well, at least it’s not…” But what are we actually doing when we say that? In this  Gup Shup, I’m unpacking how this reflex comes from both our brains and our cultures — and how it might be doing more harm than good. -Why we rush to be grateful - How the b...

 I can’t tell you how many times I’ve said that— “I’m so tired… but I didn’t even do that much today.” And for so many of us, especially in immigrant communities, that kind of tiredness isn’t physical—it’s emotional. It’s what happens when we’re constantly absorbing other people’s moods, guilt, frustration, disappointment… and calling it caring.  We talk about physical boundaries—saying no, doing...

Healing as South Asians often means navigating a mental health system shaped by whiteness — one that often fails to see us. After parting ways with a white friend who is also a therapist, I began questioning: is it that we resist help, or that the help we’re offered was never built for us? And here’s the harder truth: many working within this system — including people of colour — don’t fully recog...

It’s just you and me in this It’s Good To Gup Shup segment — a space for reflection, reclamation, and real talk. This episode was sparked by Sinners, a film that made me feel seen in someone else’s story. And that whisper of huge validation? It stayed in my bones. From Late Bloomer and Mo to Monkey Man, we’re talking about the daily contradictions of being brown in a white world. We’re finally put...

I sit down with Dr. Ami, a holistic hormone pharmacist who’s not just a clinician — she’s lived the journey. From missed periods and persistent acne to the emotional weight of feeling dismissed, she knows firsthand what many South Asian women silently endure. Together, we unpack the deep and often overlooked intersections of hormones, healing, and honesty — and explore what PCOS is really costing...

In this deeply moving episode, we sit with Reshma — a mother of three, widow, and mindfulness coach — as she opens up about the unimaginable loss of her husband to suicide. Together, we explore what it means to stay present in the deepest pain, to mother through heartbreak, and to speak honestly about mental health in a world that often whispers when it should be listening. Reshma doesn’t offer ti...

In this soulful and tender conversation, I sit down with Salima Saxton — relational dynamics coach, writer, performer, and co-host of the Women Are Mad podcast. Together, we unpack the quiet truths women carry — the roles we’ve played, the selves we’ve tucked away, and the longing to feel fully seen. Salima reflects on how often she was "very, very busy making it all right for everybody else,...

This week on Middle Fingers Up, we’re holding space for a powerful voice during Ovarian Cancer Awareness Day — Alvina Nadeem, a South Asian woman, mother, wife, AI innovator, keynote speaker, and cancer survivor who reminds us that survival isn’t just about staying alive, but about reclaiming our voice. She shares the mantra she carried as an immigrant woman in a male-dominated field — “I’ll show...

Loss is more than death — it’s the quiet grief of losing a homeland, a friendship, a relationship, trust, emotional safety, or even parts of ourselves we didn’t know we had to say goodbye to. In this powerful conversation with Palak, a Grief and Loss Recovery Specialist, we explore how "grief is love" and how we can honor all types of loss. Palak reminds us that "no emotion is good...

What happens when two Indian women—from different parts of the world—sit down to talk about parenting, patriarchy, and psychiatry? In this episode, I’m joined by Dr. Sidhana, a psychiatrist based in India, for a cross-continental conversation rooted in truth-telling, compassion, and curiosity. We reflect on what it means to be raised in systems where “the stricter the parent, the more rebellious t...

What happens when you finally find the words for what you've been carrying your whole life? "Suddenly, I had language for things that I'm experiencing." That’s the power of sitting down with someone like Tony Nabors, a racial equity educator and truth-teller who doesn’t just talk about systems—he helps us feel and understand them. In this raw and unfiltered episode, we talk abo...

In this unapologetically real conversation, I sit down with Mohini, a Holistic Relationship Coach for Ranis, who guides Desi divorcees to reclaim their power and rewrite their relationship stories. After a 14-year marriage, Mohini has come face-to-face with the complexities of cultural expectations, self-worth, and the fear of being alone. She’s now on a mission to help others find freedom and joy...

What happens when we try to understand South Asian mental health through a Western lens? We end up feeling lost—told to cut ties instead of repair them, to heal alone instead of within community. But healing was never meant to be an individual pursuit. In this conversation with Astha, we start scratching the surface—getting curious about what it would take to truly decolonize mental health. How do...

Music Media Personality and Multimedia Creative, LaToya Elle, joins us to share her journey of blending storytelling with a passion for amplifying Canadian artists. We dive into the artists on her radar, the challenges of being a Black woman in the industry, and the future of music media. LaToya opens up about the power of representation, the stories that matter most, and why true support goes bey...