Marked Safe: A Disaster Podcast

This week, Brianne experiences a glitch in the matrix, Melanie is thirsty and begging, Arkansas and the gay community are not on the same page, Melanie plans to explore bathhouses for the podcast, there's no crime in a gangster's paradise, Brianne lacks self-preservation, and the NTSB never gets invited to parties. Content warnings: intense descriptions of drowning deaths, including mult...

This week, Andrea's golden birthday turns green, Fin turns 20, Kathryn has a prankster papaw, Mia calls in with a Disney connection, Kaitlyn gets yeeted, Sara and sleeping in the woods do not mix, Ann's story gives us goosebumps, and Hayliegh has two nickels. Content warnings: tornadoes, car accident, child in peril who survives, ghosts, intense descriptions, dead birds, potentially dead...

This week, Melanie has spicy ghost fingers, Liz has BOGO disasters, Sara's aunt doesn't read the room, Cindy gets an unhelpful offer, Maren's parents won't be invited to parties after this, we would like a word with Katelyn's boyfriend, and Melanie's loud, wet bush crashes the show. Content warnings: tornadoes, ghosts, deaths of family, vague mention of seasickness, g...

This week, M & B make some M & B friends, smells deserve precision, Brianne doesn't want her tiny ship tossed, fire whirls aren't as whimsical as they sound, Melanie brings up the greatest betrayal of our friendship, blue balls last ages, we unpack the psychology of Australians, and Melanie wants to get punked by an alien. Content warnings: tornado deaths, spiders, storms, wildfi...

This week, we are a banquet hall, we may or may not be bonding, Brianne has a grudge, Melanie likes it wet, mines are bastions of safety, a hospital system finds its love language, someone considers cooperating fully, a labia does not get diagnosed, Brianne should not sell insurance, and a decision is made about Montana. Content warnings: mesothelima, lung disease, animal testing, childhood hamste...

This week, the grief blender is too loud for Josey, Melanie says the worst two words since "funny hop," Brianne wants to make "Oof" the episode title, Indiana is the land of opportunity to start a wildebeest farm, Cathie is a Florida woman both in geography and in spirit, Melanie likes her snakes huge, and a medical examiner goes above and beyond his job description. Content wa...

This week, Brianne's big spoon antics have consequences for Melanie, trust issues are still a problem, brass is ass, Pisces men can go f*ck themselves, Brianne is a sucker for a conman, we consider panties as a packing material, a bingo card of chaos is completed, Melanie loves whorey movies, David collects a full set of crimes, Melanie tries to get back into Australia, Brianne wouldn't...

This week, Melanie wiggles around with it, we contemplate victim blaming and shaming, not every rainbow is good, and some dudes will do anything to get out of parenting. Content warnings: mountain climbing deaths, broken leg, graphic discussion of dead bodies, death of a parent as a child, brief speculation that a death could have been a suicide. Links: https://populous.com/unsung-heroes-the-sherp...

This week, we are having days, Melanie takes issue with the week's bracket winner, we want to be sour bitches, Brianne attacks Hans and Melanie attacks Cody, an armchair detective saves the day, Katelyn catches her dad, Brianne sides with the raccoons, Danica floats away, we plan a ghoul vacation at Finger Lakes, Mary has a bug-out group ready, Taylor is a strong independent five year old, an...

This week, Melanie is new to the show, Squonk returns to his natural habitat, Melanie has a question for a dingo, Brianne is left on tenterhooks, Katelyn almost goes to prison, and there's a new cult leader in town. Content warnings: children in peril who mostly survive, death of a 9 week old infant is the topic of the episode and is discussed in fairly graphic detail throughout. Links: https...

This week, true love is about foot smells, it's all Melanie's fault, we are buying bat bikinis, we add a bad corporate statement to the bad corporate statements hall of shame, and Melanie is mean to sharks. Content warnings: diabetes, gangrene, appendecitis, brief and non-graphic mentions of nausea and vomiting, drowninb death and near-death of children (vague and not graphic) 45:56-46:5...

This week, Brianne confesses to a heist at the zoo, Melanie taunts us with a potential cameo, Cody is a not-yet recovering huffer, Brianne victim-blames children from the 1500s, leeches have an unconventional application, Brianne wants to live on Pudding Lane, Melanie is the queen of wild notions, we would like to interview Mothman, Brianne still has trust issues from the lightning strike episode,...

This week, Melanie is a mama bear and angers the internet, Brianne has advice for would-be criminals, Cody isn't real, Melanie is the little spoon, and we cover problematic magicians. Content warnings: burn injury, racism, minstrel shows, guns, speculation about the possibility of suicide, death from being hit by a car, children in peril who survive, reptiles, slavery, death from heart attack...

This week, we have everything BUT a head in a box in the mail, we have two cameo appearances on mic, Melanie is a pretty hooligan, 1800s pettiness beats all, and we meet the most adored dog in history. Content warnings: guns, fatal accidental shooting of pregnant woman 18:30-19:50, cocaine, gruesome discussion of autopsy on possibly living person 31:00-38:45, domestic violence, loss of adult child...

This week, Melanie tells oil rig men about her period, a brand new bracket starts, Brianne whips out the puppy eyes, Melanie is Moth Man, someone - maybe everyone - looks the other way, Melanie reveals her endgame, and Walmart falls on hard times. Content warnings: guns, children in peril, DIY amputation, birth during a disaster (baby survives), dire survival situations with mixed outcomes, police...

This week, we're not changing for anyone including ourselves, Brianne will not change her oil, it's Ford's turn to get in the pond, Melanie won't permit herself to be laid in a Pinto, and spiders are expected to be your palate cleanser. Content warnings: cars without brakes, non-graphic mention of burn injuries, burning car accident death, seriously injured 13 year old, deaths...

This week, the grief blender hits pulse, we touch wood, the eventful seafood bracket comes to an end, Fun 4 Every 1 is not quite fun for everyone, we learn about a dino the size of a dino, falling into vats of chocolate isn’t that whimsical, we need an OSHA mole, cement gets very hard, and Brianne gets bad news about aquariums Content warnings: stadium crush involving children and infants, people...

This week: Melanie incorporates smells into the seafood bracket, everybody can panic, a car is a naughty boy, sweet Ava was not prepared, and Melanie likes it creamy. Content warnings: vomit 2:15, 911 call, car accidents with fatalities including a 13 year old. Links: https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2009/09/toyota_recalls_38_million_cars.html https://www.cars.com/articles/explaining-the-to...

Melanie welcomes two lovable kitties, the bracket basket is ominous, a sports car may be made out of spaghetti, we love an internal memo, and Henry Ford supports the homies. Content warnings: multiple car accidents with fatalities and serious injuries, car accident death of a 10 year old girl from 36:05-37:15, brief mention of death of 11 year old boy at 52:00 Links: https://www.hotcars.com/this-i...

This week, grandmas everywhere need to watch their backs, we make the world's worst smoothie, Melanie wants to go to Branson, Beth dodges a bullet at Great Wolf Lodge, Alyson has a family mole, Karen imparts Thanksgiving advice, and Riley's dad is a menace. Content warnings: cancer, excessive/delayed diagnostic testing, hospice, terminal agitation, extensive discussion of grief, vague me...

This week, Melanie visits the child casino, Brianne alienates everyone she loves over Skee-Ball, oysters definitely oyster, Melanie brings up Tendongate, Brianne recommends Kleenex and lotion if your bracket is going poorly, a building is(n’t) in very good shape, Barry is silly, we piss Disney off again, underwear are not priority in a crisis, Brianne has a bougie butt, and a firefighter is very s...

This week, it's not Christmas, Melanie doesn't love a jump scare, Brianne bites her tongue about Virgos, demons want you to get bangs, and Brianne wants to be the judge of everything. Content warnings: spiders, epilepsy, feces, depression, brief mention of suicidal ideation, emaciation/malnutrition, eating spiders, urine, eating the head of a dead bird, mental illness/psychosis.

This week, Jess’s cousin fails the vibe check, everyone was actually 7, Heather’s family locks someone in a coffin, Courtney has a tragedy boner, Carla’s grandfather joins the Prankster Papaw Poker Party, Emily needs a different hobby, Jake makes the obvious choice, Adrianne is rude to an angel, Kit should freak out forever, Noah would not survive a horror movie, Katei is visited by the benevolent...

This week, Melanie has the brain frog, Brianne's cult is almost ready to launch, Melanie can't wait for Brianne's funeral, Brianne could throw a nun, Melanie is a pioneer in the field of exorcism technology, Brianne wants a movie about jacked up nuns, and Melanie solves the mystery of a manageable possession. Content warnings: brief and non-graphic mention of vomit at 0:55, blood, r...