Making Hesstory

Everything in our lives has the potential to influence what we think about God and the quality of His character. Everybody faces their own set of circumstances in life, and the challenge for us is to develop an unwavering belief that God is good, even when life is not. While our beliefs about God are formed throughout our lifetime, there's a subconscious tendency that people who believe in the exi...

Have you ever wondered why you parent the way you do? Sometimes we do what our parents did because it's all we know and we turned out okay. But sometimes we do the opposite of what our parents did because, well, our experience wasn't ideal. In this episode Brian and Katie talked about how neither of the two extremes of the parenting pendulum (authoritarian and permissive) are ideal, and some ways...

The third lie in this mini-series is that violence is power. The world we live in is training us to demand comfort, convenience, ease, and the instant gratification of our desires. It's no surprise that this has crept its way into our parenting. Often when parents want to see a behavioral shift in their kids, they'll do whatever they deem necessary to achieve that goal, including fear, intimidatio...

The second lie in this mini-series that is so easy to believe with regard to our relationships with others (especially our kids) is that anger is power. Our kids won't always do what we want them to. In fact, professional "limit tester" and "boundary pusher" would be on their business cards if they had them. As parents this has potential to be anger inducing, because we can feel disrespected when...

If something you believe is untrue, would you want to know? In our relationships with others, and most likely with our kids, there are a few lies that we can easily fall into the trap of believing. It may not happen on a conscious level, but our beliefs have a way of showing up in the way we behave. So, if you have the fruit, you have the root. Join Brian and Katie as they discuss the commonly bel...

The meaning of self-control is as profound as it is simple. With it we're able to control ourselves and choose how we'll think, feel, and act towards other people. Without it, other people will be able to choose how we'll think, feel, and act towards them. Join Brian and Katie as they unpack the power of self-control, and how it brings with it the ability to love the way God loves. Want to connect...

Few things can keep you stuck in life the way that a victim mentality can. This episode is not directed to people who have actually been a victim of the actions of others, but to those who are playing the role of the victim in life unnecessarily. Join Brian and Katie as they discuss how to identify a victim mentality, the pitfalls of developing one, and how Jesus can be looked to as a model of liv...

Responsibility is best understood as response-ability. When we develop responsibility and work towards managing our own behavior and emotions, we develop the ability to formulate thoughtful and intentional responses to the unforeseen events, problems, circumstances, and undesirable behavior from the people around us. When we lack responsibility, we lack the ability to respond, leaving us with only...

This week we're back on the topic of finding ways to implement new habits and routine in a way that works. When we try to do too much too quickly and fail after a short period, the byproduct is that we may end up teaching ourselves that we can't be trusted when it comes to making changes and implementing new habits and disciplines. Join Brian and Katie as they talk about how our lives are changed...

Bad news - we've been really sick this week! We should be back up and running next week, but in the mean time here is one of our earlier episodes. On this episode we explored what makes kids so good at being kids, and what they need from their parents in order to grow up and mature out of their childish ways. Unfortunately, there are many parents who hold their kids to a higher standard of maturit...

We thought this episode would be a good time to share an unpopular opinion - we don't love the idea of New Year's resolutions. We do, however, believe in discipline, habit forming, and creating rhythms, all of which have a more profound impact on who we are and who we become than the switching of the calendar from December to January. Join us as we discuss some practical ways to think about changi...

Do you believe that God exists? If so, what do you believe He thinks about you? Do you believe that He thinks you're unlovable? Disappointing? A failure? Or do you believe that He loves you unconditionally, and that He's proud do call you a friend? Throughout our lives we're presented with innumerable opportunities to learn to believe things about God, and unfortunately not everything we learn to...

Kids generally have their core beliefs about their identity formed by the time they're seven years old. For this reason, we need to be intentional in choosing how we speak to and about our kids. In this episode, Brian and Katie talked about their newly published children's book titled What Does God Say About Me?: Declarations For Kids, from A-Z, and their motivation behind writing it. Speaking dec...

Most parents have two things in common... First, they want obedient kids who listen and respond well. Second, they keep a few "hammers" in their parenting tool belt with which they can intimidate and coerce their kids into compliance when faced with resistance. The problem with this method is that it pursues instant results at the expense of long-term teaching and equipping. As our kids grow up, t...

Too often parents make the mistake of assuming that punishment and discipline are the same thing. But in the interest of developing healthy relationships and connections with our kids (and, honestly, everybody else around us), it is absolutely necessary that we draw a distinction between them. Punishment is a tool of the world. Its motivation is fear and its goal is compliance. Discipline, on the...

By the time our kids are around four years old they'll be able to begin differentiating between socially desirable and undesirable behavior. At this point they'll start recognizing which kids they like (or don't like) to be around. This doesn’t mean that we begin teaching them when they turn four. Rather it means that the behavior that we either confront or condone up until that point will play a...

The Bible is filled with some really fun and, if we're being honest, weird events and experiences. God has always had a way of getting things done while not being overly concerned with whether or not we would find His methods “normal” or “logical.” When Jesus came on the scene He both taught and demonstrated the ways of God's Kingdom. He healed the sick, raised the dead, cast out demons, and He al...

The mind, which contains our thoughts (ideas, beliefs, opinions, images, and memories) also contains our feelings (emotions, sensations, and desires). Too often our feelings are allowed to dictate the direction of our life, our decisions, our habits, and our identity. This is unfortunate, because while feelings can be great servants, they make terrible masters. In the interest of pursuing a transf...

"Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind..." - Romans 12:2 Your mind is caught in a battle between two opposing Kingdoms; the Kingdom of God and that of the world. Either of these kingdoms will, if you allow them, be the influence that shapes how you think and feel. One difference is that the influence of the Kingdom of God only comes through intentional f...

Brian had an opportunity to sit down with Chris Dupré and hear his story - one of love, redemption, forgiveness, restoration, and grace. His story is also one of meeting Jesus, but not in the way most people do. He met Jesus face to face, and, well, everything changed for him after that. Hopefully this piqued your interest, because this is a story that everyone needs to hear. Chris Dupré is also a...

Brian and Katie continued the conversation on the need for continued growth and transformation that comes by the power of the gospel of Jesus. It can be easy to feel stuck in a way of existing and behaving, wanting to change and see growth, but not knowing how to go about it. Behavior modification is typically the go-to method. And while it might work as a short term solution to the problem of our...

Do you ever find yourself, like so many others, trapped in a cycle of shame - feeling inadequate, wanting to change and grow - but not knowing how? Often we're told, whether by family, friends, or social media influencers, what it is that we need to do. If you're a parent, you need to be (patient, kind, peaceful, gentle, etc...). The problem is, few people are actually telling us how to go about t...

This week Brian and Katie continued the conversation on goals, and discussed the possibility that by aiming for the good things in life we'll miss out on experiencing the best things. Machiavelli is often quoted for saying that "the ends justify the means." While he isn't exactly a role model of ours, it got us thinking about these two questions: 1. Is it true that the ends justify the means? Is i...

When we have a goal in life, whether it's having a healthier marriage, making more money, or raising obedient kids, we need to keep in mind that the action we take will be easily justified, so long as it appears to lead to the success of achieving that goal. The more you want to have more money, the less you'll worry about whether or not your methods come at the expense of the well-being of other...

Culture exists everywhere. Every place - from restaurants, to doctor's offices, to homes, and everything in between has a culture. The creating of a culture cannot be escaped. Where you find people, you'll find values, and where you find values you will find culture. Join Brian and Katie on this episode as they discuss the importance of understanding how cultures are developed, and how to avoid ac...