LOVERS by Shan

If you’re a podcast listener, you already know that there’s a whole lot of discussions about what people don’t do in relationships, what they need to be doing, and insight on what romantic partners want from others. And I guess it’s all well and good to have standards, but it’s even better to:Be aware of which standards are based on what we actually need to have a quality romantic partnership vs w...

What Is Your Love Story? Not the one that you’re in per se, but the one that subconsciously, you’ll move mountains or reality, to live inside? Psychologists have identified 26 kinds of stories that people commit to BEFORE committing to their romantic partner so, which one is yours? Our starring guest Raven Ross who you can recall from Netlfix’s reality series, Love is Blind Season 3. She is also a...

We often talk about how men have an easier life, but I think at this point we can also agree that maintaining the identity of “a real man” is extremely hard. Masculinity is what I would call a wet fish identity - because like catching a fish with your bear hands - It’s hard to do, even harder to hold onto and incredibly easy to lose a grip on. And one of the fastest ways to call your capability of...

Did you know that every 7 seconds, a man thinks about sex? That's more than 500 times an hour and more than 12,000 times a day… And even though that sounds crazy, I’m sure it sounds familiar because this stat has circulated for decades. Now, myth-buster there is no scientific evidence to back this up, and studies that HAVE been done site that men think about sex an average of 19 times a day with t...

In this episode, I want to break down what I know about “knowing” someone is the one, before you know their true character. This isn’t meant to knock anyone who chooses to mate this way, because culturally a lot of us subscribe to the importance of instant attraction even if we don’t think we do - but instead to provide you with some knowledge that I wish I had before letting love at first sight l...

Let’s talk about submission! My fav definition of this comes from Hafeez who simply said to submit is to sub (be underneath) another person’s mission. Now, one of the main purposes of romantic relationships is to be stronger together - a concept we’ve gone into before when we discussed self expansion theory on episode 4 featuring Jeannie Mai. The Self expansion theory states that the best way to e...

For women in their 30s, 1 in 5 will experience problems conceiving their first child. Deja Riley, our starring guest gives firsthand advice of what it's like to go through over two years of fertility treatments. A grueling experience that's cost her over $20,000 and almost her marriage. In this episode Deja tells all: her experience with IUI, IVF, miscarriage, a chemical pregnancy, eastern medicin...

In this episode, I sit down with my mom and sister to talk about our sex ed growing up and now as parents ourselves, what we believe is the most important lesson to teach our kids when it comes to sex and love...You'll also hear a good bit of a past episode that you can listen to in its entirety here.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/lovers-and-friends-with-shan-boodram/id1586679298 I also exp...

Up to 1 in 4 known pregnancies may end in miscarriage. For many of us, this stat is old news - but as we continue to have this conversation aloud after generations of keeping this pain private - what I do think is new is considering how the father feels about the loss. It seems like a no-brainer, but speaking from personal experience, it hadn’t really crossed my mind until recently. So, let’s talk...

Open relationships. Now, you can clutch them pearls and raise those eyebrows all you want to, but this conversation is not going away - especially not in America. Using two separate samples based on the U.S. Census, researchers found that one-fifth of the population in the United States has engaged in consensual non-monogamy at some point in their lives and if the trend continues, the only place t...

Becky G is an award-winning, chart topping, international superstar who has always been grateful for her life, but at one point, hated herself and the experience of being alive. In order to get out of that dark place and to get the clarity she needed to heal she knew she needed a superhero, but what she didn’t know is “that hero” would ultimately need to be herself. In this episode Becky G candidl...

Does making friends get harder as you get older?  How the hell do I make friends? According to the American Perspective Survey, May 2021,  a lot of people are not  satisfied with the size of their friendship group. About half of Americans (51 percent) report they are very satisfied or completely satisfied with the number of friends they have. 30 percent say they are only somewhat satisfied, and 17...

In this episode, I am answering 10 questions submitted by YOU, allll about sex! I am looking forward to making more Q+A episodes, so feel free to submit your questions around sex, love and dating. Huge thank you to the sponsors of this episode Ritual Use code Lovers for 10% your order for 3 months. Http://ritual.com/loversFollow Shan:https://www.instagram.com/shanboodramhttps://www.tiktok.com/@sha...

Lauren Jauregui talks about breaking things off with Ty Dolla Sign, writing Always Love, holistically healing and then finding real love again with another woman. Lauren Jauregui rose to prominence as a member of the girl group Fifth Harmony, which became one of the best- selling girl groups of all time. Since then, she has gone on to release her solo projects “Expectations” and “Prelude.” Lauren...

In this episode, I talk about the 10 soulmates we may encounter over the span of our lives. Thanks for being patient with me this week on this episode. Promise to do better! Here are the 10 types of soulmates. The Stranger Soul Mate - unrequited love is still love. We needed them, we loved them, we were certain we were destined to marry them and they barely remember our last name. The black hole S...

Have you ever found yourself attracted to someone of the same sex? How do you navigate re-orienting or re-navigating your sexual orientation after a queer experience? That is exactly what we are breaking down in this episode. Our starring guest is singer, songwriter Kiana Lede. Kiana is an Arizona born actress, singer and songwriter who burst into the scene with her Youtube series dubbed “Soulfood...

Celibacy, abstinence, sex strike, sexlessness, dry spell ….call it what you may but we can all agree is challenging. This week we are joined by Stephan Speaks- one of the most popular voices in the relationship education space. Stephan has devoted himself to a life of celibacy on more than one occasion: first run with the intention to connect with God, second to connect with his God-given purpose...

On your journey to find and keep love (if this is your wish) have you ever felt like maybe you are meant to stay single forever? That is how this week’s guest, Glo Atanmo aka Glo Graphics on IG felt throughout most of her life. She was used to not being any man's first choice only to later date 12 quality men at once. Then in 2022, she embarked on her pursuit of finding her forever love.  She is n...

Are drinking games for lovers or losers? Does alcohol make sex better and wetter or dryer and dimmer? A study by Kathryn Lakeland of Femfresh found that 75 per cent of women said they liked to drink before getting into bed with their husband or boyfriend. In this episode we ask those in the 75 per cent to examine if this is a powerful or limiting decision. Many share that alcohol makes them feel c...

This week's question is : What does it mean to be safe in a relationship? Safety in a relationship looks different for everyone. Our starring guest this week Nick Viall and I talked about a lot, but underneath it, I think this is the core of it… 1) How love hasn’t been safe in the past and 2) how he’s redefining safety within in his new relationship: one that has external threats in the form of pu...

Who did you become last year? What is something you could not do last year that you want to be able to do by year's end? Shan Boodram shares how 2022 - the most transformative, miserable, lucrative and full year of her life - is grounding her 2023 with these twenty questions in mind. Who did you become? What was the single best thing that happened this past year? What was the single most challengi...

What happens when you combine love, sex, magic and best friends? In this episode Shan sits down with Erica and Milah, hosts of Good Moms, Bad Choices and together they unravel the goddess experience. What does that look like? How did it happen and most of all…. did it bring them closer as best friends? This episode touches on the importance of platonic intimacy and how through bearing it all with...

Singer, songwriter Jessie Reyes candidly opens up about how on her quest for love, she recently played the role of the “bad guy”. For many, especially women, this is something that can be very hard to admit. Jessie Reyez reflects on how she f***** up, how she tried to right her wrong, how she coped when her apology to her ex wasn’t enough, and what insight she gained from this experience. Jessie R...

Steelo Brim shares how the culture of toxic masculinity where men are encouraged not to go deep with themselves, almost destroyed his chances at real love both with himself and with women. He also talks about how he and his longtime girlfriend alahna jade chose to break out of the monogamy-one-size-fits-all box in order to create a healthy relationship on their terms and Steelo shares why his last...

 In this episode, I sit down with my lover, my partner, my baby daddy, my everything,  Jared. This conversation gets really real. We love our kids but do we still like our life? Do we still like each other? This time in Colombia with my family has sprung up a lot of 'aha' moments: some good and others not so good. Life after kids is unpredictable and it can sometimes feel like that spark is lost....