Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott

As most of you know, I wrote my book because I found so many self-help books for singles to be utterly UNhelpful! That being said, over the years, I did come across—thankfully!—several supportive and empowering books. In a few weeks we’ll be celebrating National Unmarried & Single Americans week so I thought we’d kick off September with a review of some of my fav books for living single. They...

For the last year, people have been asking me, “Have you watched Dopesick ? Karin, you have to see it!” So, I subscribed to Hulu and started the series and also read the book on which the series is based. The true story is incredibly disturbing and tragic and heartbreaking. Author Beth Macy exposes how Purdue Pharma, the makers of Oxycontin, convinced doctors their patients had virtually no chance...

It’s our 200th episode—time to reflect on where we’ve been and where we’re headed! My first thought is how grateful I am for the opportunity to share with you and our community. Your comments, emails, and dms mean everything to me. They let me know you resonate with Love & Life’s mission:  “Conversations grounded in psych research to help us thrive in love and life.” On Love & Life ,...

As many of you know, my book, Single is the New Black:  Don’t Wear White ‘til it’s Right, resulted from my experiences as a single woman who read all the other books for single women and found them, in my estimation, to be lacking. I resisted other books’ theses—that something must be inherently wrong with me and that’s why I was still single. Also, so many self-help books for single women mo...

A little while ago, I received an email: “Hey there! My name is Jenny Mallard and I’m a Canadian singer-songwriter and also a huge fan of your podcast. I actually just released my debut single, partially inspired by the themes of some of your podcast episodes and your book. Basically, I’ve always wanted a man to write me a love song. Then one day, I realized, I’m a singer songwriter. I’ll just wri...

In preparing for part 2 of our series called Empowered Evolving, I reflected on my own life—when have I evolved? How have I grown and changed—even when in doing so, I lost relationships and connection and security? Of course, calling off my wedding came to mind… When you break an engagement, you’ve evolved in a way that’s unexpected—unexpected to your fiancé, obviously, and also to your friends, y...

“Might as well face it, you’re addicted to love.”—Robert Palmer  Are you addicted to relationships? Many of us—even strong, independent women—feel unsettled, lonely, and anxious when we don’t have a partner.  Life coach Nazra Peterson believes single shaming is to blame—and often, we’re single shaming ourselves!  In our conversation, we dive deep into the following topics:  The...

In this week’s mini episode, I’d like to share a few thoughts about the Empowered Evolving series we kicked off last week. I knew my conversation with Isabella would generate some feedback and I’ve received both positive and negative responses to it.  How do we remain connected with those we love, even when—or especially when!—we disagree. We want to live empowered, we want to grow and evolve...

Welcome to Love & Life’s occasional series—Empowered Evolving. We talk about empowered living all the time on Love & Life. We look to psych research and techniques from psychotherapy to help us, as former Love & Life guest, Dr. Steven C. Hayes founder of ACT puts it, “take committed action in the service of our chosen values.” We live empowered by living out our values—clarifying what...

We all desire deep connection. We’re wired for intimacy. But searching for it is difficult and even when we find our person and we’re caught up in the excitement of falling in love, our journey to intimacy has really only just begun. Throughout partnership and marriage, our connection ebbs and flows. Sometimes we feel extremely close; at other times, we feel estranged and distant from the person w...

One of the questions I’m most often asked surrounds masculine and feminine energy. How can independent, empowered women embody feminine energy? Isn’t this essentially a contradiction in terms?  Are we able to inhabit the fullness of ourselves—including our ambition and drive—without presenting ourselves in a masculine manner and thereby attracting men who lead with feminine energy? Teacher, w...

Christine Coen was a registered dietitian and fitness professional. She guided and encouraged clients toward their nutrition and exercise goals. She didn’t think too much about mental health—until she had to. When Christine fell into depression, she panicked. It was her job to motivate others, but she was struggling to even get out of bed in the morning herself! She started researching and soul se...

When I come across an empowered woman who’s all about empowering others, I want to share her journey with you—which is exactly why I invited Brooke Mullen of Sapahn to the program. Recently, I randomly came across Sapahn when I noticed this gorgeous purse/backpack in the March issue of Harper’s Bazaar. The bag reminded me of one I’d admired several years ago in a boutique in Indianapolis. Apparent...

Recently, I appeared on aParently Speaking podcast with Miriam conner. Miriam asked me to speak about fear—specifically, how parents may inadvertently pass on anxiety to their children. We discussed humans’ typical responses to fear—building upon the Fight or Flight model we all learned in school, and we explored the profound power of how we frame fear i.e. do we consider it part of our identity?...

You’re probably familiar with mindfulness, but how does it apply to dating? Marie Thouin, Ph. D. shares how a mindfulness practice can enhance our lives in myriad realms—and certainly when it comes to dating! Join us for a conversation surrounding: The science of mindfulness—there’s a TON of research on it! The self-knowledge mindfulness affords—even in the midst of heartbreak and loss. Why mindfu...

We all desire deep, genuine intimacy. But so often, it feels incredibly difficult to cultivate! Sometimes we’re so infatuated we rush things. Other times, we fear getting close because we’ve been hurt so many times before. In our first Love & Life Live, psychotherapist Elliott Anderson joins me to speak to Judson University students about how to develop and cultivate deep, authentic, lasting r...

Divorce is brutal. The wound it leaves is deep and lasting. Can we find restoration and redemption after the death of a marriage? Can we resuscitate a demolished heart? Leisse Wilcox and Elliott Anderson discuss the profound grief inherent to divorce. They hold space for the hurting. They honor the loss and pain. And simultaneously, they invite you on a healing journey. Specifically, they discuss:...

In the US alone, more than 300,000 couples over the age of 50 divorce every year and this trend is growing. If you include the adult children involved, between 900,000 and 1.2 million people are impacted by the dissolution of these marriages. In fact, the term “gray divorce” has entered the lexicon to describe couples who part ways later in life. Despite the number of people affected by gray divor...

Our families have a profound impact on us—not just in childhood, but throughout our lifetime! But, family dynamics can be tricky to sort out due to the intensity of emotions and because we lack the objectivity necessary to see ourselves and our connections clearly; it’s hard to observe a system when you’re part of the system. Furthermore, sometimes our families can unintentionally sabotage our eff...

In this final segment of our “Relationship Strain of COVID” series, psychotherapist Kate Lambie joins me again for a discussion on values and how they impact our individual responses to the various elements of the pandemic. Spoiler alert—it all goes back to safety and security! We also consider the reality that at times, we may share the same values yet choose to act upon them in different ways. W...

In part two of our series on the relational strain of the pandemic, psychotherapist Kate Lambie joins me to share a trauma informed understanding of fear. No matter what stance we’ve taken regarding the pandemic, we’ve all felt scared at one point or another. Some of us fear the virus; others worry more about the government’s policies surrounding mandates. Either way, our sense of security has bee...

The last two years have taken a toll on every area of our lives. One of the most painful elements of the pandemic has been the division it’s caused. Relationships have been strained and, in some cases, torn apart. How did we get here? How is it that friends and family members see the last two years from such different vantage points? In this episode, I talk about the beliefs we held before 2020 an...

Elliott is back to answer your questions in Part 2 of our conversation about Avoidant Attachment style. We start with a question from a listener who wrote in after hearing episode 165 about Anxious Attachment in which Elliott mentioned that “oneness” takes years to develop. Her question was: 1. What’s the difference between intimacy and oneness? We then get back to Avoidant Attachment and address...

Psychotherapist Elliott Anderson is back to continue our series on Attachment Styles. This week we unpack Avoidant Attachment and consider the question, “Is it actually possible to have a relationship with someone with an avoidant attachment style?” Specifically, we address: Why avoidant men may initially appear very excited about the relationship and interested in commitment, but then later, they...

As Love & Life listeners know, psychologist Dr. Duana Welch, author of the Love Factually book series, encourages us to date as “high status” women. In this episode, as always, she provides the science behind HOW to date high status and WHY it’s imperative we do so—especially when it comes to major decisions like whether to live together before getting married. Specifically, Dr. Welch addresse...