Looking for the Real God

Christy takes her listeners on her book writing journey of the past decade. How she started even thinking about it in the first place, the frustration and discouragement she felt along the way, that she finished her manuscript last Sunday night, and the fact that a hybrid publishing company wants to work with her! There is some up-front cost to hybrid publishing, but Christy is confident that God...

As Christy finishes her series on church, she ponders her similaries to Jinger Duggar Vuolo. Christy was in the same cult as the Duggar family and got out 20+ years ago. As she has listened to interviews and read articles talking about Jinger's book she has noticed a theme from people responding. Many of them want Jinger to deconstruct even further. The sides forming around deconstruction remind C...

Continuing her series on church, Christy talks about knowing when to leave your church. She refers to her background as a youth pastor's wife and how the perspective from church staff to simple church member is so different. Christy give three valid reasons to leave a church and gets pretty passionate about the third reason. It is her hope that more people will stand up to the toxic cultures and l...

Christy digs into the heart of church. She begins at the beginning with the 1st century church. but instead of idolizing it with rosy colored glasses, Christy points out the familiar problems that we still face today. False teaching, legalism and religion, division, chaos, and sin. Broken people do broken things. And yet Christy still believes in the church and in the world-wide body of Jesus Chri...

Christy opens Season 8 by inviting her listeners to join her new series on church. Many of us have been burned by our experiences within the walls of a church building. Today Christy just contemplates the churches that have been a part of her life over the years. She asks the uncomfortable questions but doesn't offer any answers in this episode. What is wrong with our modern churches? Is this what...

Christy finishes her Advent Journey and Season Seven with a contemplation of God's love. Despite the brokenness in the world, despite the pain we face, despite our fears and doubts, we are passionately and intentionally loved by God. Christy looks into the genealogy of Jesus and considers the women who are listed there in Matthew One. She wonders about what God is saying and about the way He value...

Christy continues her Advent journey by contemplating the angel's message to the shepherds declaring good news that would bring great joy to all the people. What does it mean for the message to be for ALL the people? Christy contemplates the people that Jesus chose to spend time with when He was on earth. She contrasts that with the religious leaders and their opinions of Jesus. Then Christy bring...

Christy continues her Advent 2022 journey this time with the Candle of Peace. The angles came to the shepherds proclaiming the birth of Jesus and declaring peace on earth. But we don't have peace on earth. If anything the world just keeps getting more riled up and disunified. What kind of peace did Jesus really come to bring us? Can God give peace even when we struggle in this broken world with th...

Christy invites her listeners to join her journey of celebrating Advent for the first time this year. Today, the first Sunday of Advent, we light the Candle of Hope. Have we ever needed hope more than now? Christy ponders how this season of Christmas that is supposed to be "the most wonderful time of the year" is often just full of stress, disappointment, and loneliness. But it is into this broken...

Christy shares about one of her students this year who has reminded her of God's crazy love for us. Many of us have baggage from our religious upbringings that form our view of God in an unhealthy way. Christy encourages her listeners to lean into a God who welcomes us with open arms.  Scripture Referenced: Romans 8:1, 35-39; Ephesians 2:12-13; John 3:16-18 Related Episodes: #17 Broken and Beloved...

Christy thinks out loud with her listeners about the Kingdom of Jesus, our ordinary lives, and the true reality of the Spirit. It's a gentle ramble that will hopefully challenge norms while bringing encouragement. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit christylynnewood.substack.com

Christy re-shares one of her most popular episodes from Season One: But God Isn't a Vending Machine. **trigger warning: pregnancy loss** "Christy shares how God used personal tragedy to challenge the formulaic way she viewed and interacted with Him. She exposes ways we attempt to manipulate God within our religious Christianity." Bible Verses Referenced: Isaiah 45:6-7 Related Blog Post: Choosing T...

Christy finishes her series on prayer by talking about liturgy, the way more and more people raised in evangelical circles are being drawn to it, and the controversy surrounding it in some churches. Christy talks about the missing frameworks that liturgy provides, her own recent experiences, and conversations she's recently had with others. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss th...

Christy continues her series on prayer by talking about prayer walks, prayer journaling, and listening prayer. Walks were a huge part of Christy's life as she began to question and then left her cult. They were also vital to her entry into the real world as she processed her beliefs, her self, and the culture around her. Journaling has also been a part of Christy's life for over twenty years and i...

Christy continues her series on prayer by exploring two ancient prayer practices: silent contemplative prayer and breath prayer. Sharing how these prayer practices have encouraged her own prayer life, Christy challenges her listeners to try something new (or old). Contemplative and breath prayer are both wonderful for times in our lives when we have no words, when we aren't sure how to come to God...

Christy begins a new series on prayer by talking about awkward prayer, formulaic prayer, and the ways we often feel guilt and shame for a lack of prayer. She reminds her listeners that at its core prayer is a chance to connect and communicate with God. Christy talks about her own experiences with prayer and introduces some forms of prayer that she will be exploring in the next few weeks. This is a...

As Christy concludes her series on Fringe to Mainstream, she contemplates the political homelessness that exists for anyone in the middle ground these days. Christy ponders a podcast she listened to recently called The Run Up from the New York Times that is exploring how we got to this fraught place of tension in politics. Looking back at last week's episode on the dogmatism that results from fear...

As Christy continues her series on how the fringe of conservative Christianity is becoming mainstream, she reviews the latest episode of The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill podcast. Listening to host Mike Cosper and author and therapisdt Dan Allender discuss spiritual abuse, narcissism, and trauma, Christy realized something. She knows what it is about certain elements of Evangelical Christianity that...

Christy chats about her concerns with the way some mainstream evangelicals appear to idolize the family. Their focus on the family unit, protecting their children, fear of the world, and the importance of homeschooling bring her right back to the cult days. Christy knows that trying to isolate and insulate your family out of fear doesn't work. She has seen the devastation that can come firsthand. ...

Christy kicks off Season 7 with an overview of where she hopes to go this season. As she watches modern evangelical culture, Christy is reminded of her days in Bill Gothard's cult. She is concerned about the direction evangelicalism is taking and the way many fringe ideas are becoming accepted in the mainstream church. As she reminisces about how it felt to see the Duggar family on national televi...

In this final episode of Summer 2022, Christy tackles the ideology of Christian Nationalism. Unknowingly, this is exactly what Christy was taught and believed growing up in Bill Gothard's Christian cult. It was her desire as a brainwashed 15-year-old to redeem culture by influencing it in a way that would cause all people to end up living like her group. A scary thought in her modern mind! Christy...

A friend recently asked Christy how much her children know about her Christian cult days. Thinking that many listeners might have the same question, Christy decided to do a podcast episode. Today she talks about what her kids know and what topics she is cautiously talking through as she parents. Those topics include salvation, modesty, dating, and more. This is a public episode. If you would like...

Christy continues her summer series reminiscing about the cult days by talking about going back to her hometown and house on a recent family camping trip. Because her story took place in the Thumb of Michigan but most of her healing happened away from that space, going back is always an interesting experience. Christy shares how God used KJ Ramsey's new book, "The Lord is My Courage" to remind her...

On the first Summer bonus episode from 2022, Christy explores what characteristics define a cult. She finds it fascinating that those cult characteristics fit Bill Gothard's Institute that she was a part of in the 90s, as well as Warren Jeffs and his FLDS group, and even Mark Driscoll and the Mars Hill church. This summer Christy plans to release a few more bonus episodes with stories from her cul...

Christy finishes her series on Christianese Phrases as well as Season 6 by looking at what it means to "get a word from the Lord." She explores similar phrases that can also be used to spiritualize any decision we make. It's easy to use Christianese to justify our own plans and desires. At the same time, Christy believes that the Holy Spirit is real and does speak to and guide us. How can we disce...