Kickers of Elves

Welcome Voyager’s "Richard [sic] Picardo", and Julian Bashir's parents! But Bashir… we gots opinions. Hugh’s issues do not reflect a “rejection of Gene’s vision.” He doesn’t like how it was implemented. A new kind of Special Man? “Wholeness”? A reflection on Bashir not being that great of a doctor. Bashir’s dad is a revelation. Leeta and Rom have a B plot though. Should Leeta just tell Rom how she...

Part two of Worf and Garak being awesome. Dukat: Still a jerk. Right over from the last ep. Is this a new episode or more of a continuation of one long episode. Lets talk about these titles. Why doesn’t the Dominion kill its prisoners? Other runabout questions we might not have answers for… yet. Nerds hate plotholes. Let’s rehash some Ziyal arguments from last episode. But Worf. Kitomer re-accords...

The Dominion War approaches! Are we in the best "3 song run" across all the "albums" of DS9? Is there something different about Bashir? Oh boy, Ziyal: You look different. Wade and James have wildly different ideas about the nature of Garak and Ziyal’s relationship. The best Worf stuff… ever? Chekov’s Breen. Sisko has an idea for the wormhole Kira doesn’t like, should Dax have had something to say...

Sisko tracks Michael Eddington down and Trekkers everywhere were divided. Our beloved Peter Allen Fields returns! Sisko is angry! Who breaks bad in this episode? The ethics of escalation.  Oh, the Victor Hugo. Should Star Trek hold their tongue before throwing shade at the writing of female characters? "Not enough!" A Civil War reference from James. No voicemails this week, but stick around til th...

Son of Odo?  It's an episode all about parenthood. Odo discovers a little pile of goo and goes through all the feelings a humanoid can feel. Kira gives birth to a son of O'Brien, while her boyfriend gets a little jealous. A and B plot symmetry!   A tidbit blows our minds and bums us out. Odo has a bad back- A digression on mattresses. Bajoran birthing practices… are odd. GONG. in Voicemails (45:37...

Bryan Fuller makes his Star Trek debut. With a riff on the Agatha Christie novel And Then There Were None, previously titled Ten Little Indians, previously titled something even more Problematic Kira's friends are being murdered, but by who? “The Prophets will take care of him”… Will they? Worf is brings the light fun to the episode for once. He knows many things. Where’s Shakaar while folks from...

Sisko gets high.  Or is that a simplification of a more complicated story and issues? Join us for some arguing about Starfleet's actions when faced with god-aliens.  Sisko is "touched by the prophets" and discovers a secret city, and a lot of actually important stuff arguably happens in this DS9 episode. New uniforms! Is Bajor finally joining the Federation? “Optics of the admiral” Kai Ratched ret...

Odd couplings! Odo and Quark crash land on a dump of a planet and nearly die climbing a mountain. But first Nog returns! We cover the B plot and ask the question: is Jake Sisko the Rory Gilmore of DS9?   What is Nog doing back? Does Starfleet send away their unwanted cadets?   James has some rap references to make and TOS references to point out.   Odo’s porn habits.  Talk to us about Vulcan Love...

Terok Nor? James finds it a Terok Bore.   On the way back from an occupation convention Odo, Sisko, Dax, and Garak all get Quantum Leaped back 9 years to before Odo was chief of security, and Kurtwood Smith held sway.  Things start getting all wibbly wobbledy with the timeline and reality and just what exactly is going on here?   We're divided on the quality of this one, even if we aver that seaso...

Put on your spandex aerobics outfits. We're going to Risa! Worf is the worst boyfriend. Why is Dax with him again? Is this… waitaminute... a good episode? Bild Lilli horgons. Is Risa a planet of sex workers? Planet Vegas? Without Capitalism? Anarchist Vegas? Vanessa Williams guest stars as the woman who killed Curzon. Now. Let us objectify Bashir:  A different bodytype for a different era. Leeta m...

Gotta go back in time. No, not to our new Fatty Arbuckle-cast. Back to the Enterprise! The "first" one. The DS9 crew gets to revisit everyone's favorite era to revist, judging from recent TV and movies. With the magic of developing technology and effects. Lets get some Discovery thoughts out early.  Except we'll get back to that over and over again.  There's some spoilers if you haven't had some o...

Oh great. Another body possession trope? Why waitaminute, we loved this one!   Keiko O'Brien isn't herself, and Miles has to follow instructions lest the ghost possessing her does throws her off a ledge or nosebleeds her to death.  Just how well does this episode turn up the heat to boil the frog that is a stressed out Irishman? Pah wraiths. Huh. First we’ve heard of those.   Plust, a B plot that...

Red Badge of Courage on the Western Front. Jake and Bashir get stuck behind enemy lines and Jake realizes maybe he's not the bravest guy. This episode hits a lot of our buttons. When exactly did we start enjoying Dax this much? Sisko has some fatherhood scenes; what do the father's on the podcast think? Civil war knowledge gets trotted out.  Vietnam. Lots to cover in this episode! In voicemails (4...

Lookin for love. A whole lotta love in this one. Of various sorts. Things that have been building up for many episodes of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine come to a head. Grilka from House of Quark returns. Horniness abounds. James' favorite B plot. Hugh is uncomfortable. Wade wrote down a lot of Klingon but contains himself. Farce fulfilled finally. Science fiction full circle with Cyrano. Of course we...

Stuck on a planet with casualties. A classic Trek morality play? It's a return to dealing with the Dominion when Sisko and an away team find a crashed Jem Hadar ship.  A new Vorta emerges.   Who is Panthro's sister? Are the best episodes of Deep Space Nine on the station or off of it? Forgive us for the lack of voicemails this week. Give us call if you're frustrated with us! 917 408 3898 and if yo...

Season 5 commences! And the guys gets to play Klingons!   After the season 4 finale Sisko has to go undercover.  Sisko, Obrien, and Odo get into various degrees of character and Michael Dorn gets to laugh at everyone for experiencing what he gets to deal with every day of shooting.  Which actor got out of this due to a latex allergy? Who was the most miserable, Brooks or Meaney?  How much fun are...

White Album time!  Will our choices lead to a fight as bad as those had by the Beatles? Season 4 complete! Can we narrow down this fantastic 26 episode season of television into a streamlined 12 episode run, similar to more recent "prestige" television?  We've done it for every season so far; is season 4 easier or more difficult than we imagined it would be? What criteria does each of us use? Will...

Odo Must Suffer! In the season finale Odo suddenly falls ill after Garak tries to play matchmaker, and the only thing to do is to try and find the changeling homeworld. There's a lot of just hanging out in this episode that is also very consequential to the story of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.  Sure, Big Things Happen, but the Ops crew still has time to joke about Kira's pregnant sneezing, Miles'...

Quark is dying! Of "Dork syndrome" James hates Ferengi Ebay. But first, the B plot. What is Obrien’s hook? Does the Kira pregnancy work in this episode beyond being an interesting fix for a production problem? Just how are things going to develop with the O'briens and Kira? Back in the A plot, there's some disagreement over whether this is a high quality Ferengi episode.  Is this an important poin...

We interrupt our regular DS9 programming with a special bonus preview of our latest podcast endeavor! Kickers of Elves will be exploring Frank Herbert's scifi epic, Dune. What makes the world of Arrakis endure for scifi fans? Why is the book such a "white whale" to adapt for filmmakers? This limited series podcast will begin with the text itself, and progress through multiple "failed" interpretati...

Is Julian Bashir a Good Doctor? We have to contend with a question we’ve asked this entire podcast.   In Dominion space Julian and Dax find some "physiologically different" human-looking humanoids who are suffering from a manufactured disease. Hugh is not a disease guy.  Was Jen Kirkman, of all people, pregnant in this episode? Certainly not.   Let’s figure out the etymology of “quickening” and wh...

DS9 done right. So much is crammed in this episode. After chasing off some Breen and hanging out in the lunchroom, SH#! gets real at the station when some Jem'Hadar asplode a pylon.  No time for mourning though, as everyone minus Bashir and Kira take chase into the gamma quadrant, meet a dream team of 90s B movie actors, and remind us all about that Dominion thing.   Details and worldbuilding abou...

Badlands and Bad Men. Or are they really bad? Who's bad? You know who's bad. Relationships are strained and even broken when secrets get out. But first! Wade has a nontraditional perspective on the B plot with Garak and Ziyal.  Sisko and Kasidy hit some bumps in their relationship, even as Jake learns about biscotti. The morallity and merit of the Maquis are discussed ad nauseum. Are the maquis an...

What happened here? Just how did this episode come about?  When the widow of your vaunted creator wants to pitch a story, you let her, because you're not a jerk. Marky Mark, we have words for you. Space Vampires? Is this… Babylon 5? We talk about the craft of writing, and how it pertains to the subject and content of this episode. Masters of the Universe? Oh, yes. What good CAN we say about this e...

A casual jaunt across dimensions. Rub a ceiling fan motor and transport yourself to another place... Jake feels his mom's hands again! Ben Sisko makes some faces! Is this the worst mirror episode yet, or the the best? Pure dumb fun? We get the first appearance of Mirror Worf. Is that good enough? For James, enjoying the Mirror Universe: Like laughing at jokes in pornos. Topics we move to to talk a...