Kickers of Elves

Things are about to explode! Or the station is. An alarm is triggered the Deep Space Nine crew have to solve a bunch of technobabble puzzles to escape. It's another Star Trek episode where they don't actually go anywhere, but it's actually pretty great because Dukat shows up! Wade is really into escape rooms. Not sure what that is? You will by the end of this podcast! What makes this such a great...

Two Aliens, a man, and a baby. Quark buys some salvage and falls into a plot so good that it gets re-used by Rick and Morty two decades later. But first: An extended conversation on the societal roles and sexual mores of Dabo girls. Parental opinions! A load bearing episode! And we end with some viewer responses! Voicemail and email both this time. 917 408 3898 Let us know what you think!

Kira is a Cardie. Or... is she? The Obsidian Order is pulling some shenanigans and Kira Nerys gets stole. Once the mind drugs take effect she's supposed to remember being a Cardassian operative hidden away on Bajor during the occupation, and how much she loves her dad. But hey, you probably saw the episode if you're listening to this podcast! We talk about what could have been with the original pi...

24th century music sucks. Dax plays a song, becomes a moody teenager, and learns that her hormones are all out of whack. So... off to the Trill Homeworld to solve a mystery, learn a totally new explanation of Symbiosis, and take some milky baths with slugs! Acting is discussed. As is master magician Jeff McBride! But mostly slugs! Lots of trying to figure out what the heck the deal with Trills are...

MARRIED LIFE Keiko and Miles, Quark and a Klingon lady; this one's all about problems with women. But FINALLY it's not completely ham-fisted in it's understanding. No picnics are had. Also: Bashir, a PUA before The Game was even a thing. Wade butchers the Klingon language. “The WASP” podcast explores various relations to founding fathers and separatists… Ferengi financial acuity and certain times...

There has been a change in format from our regular scheduled programming. The OA... Is this really a show worth watching? It depends! Instead of an oldie from the 90s, we take a leap forward to discuss this most controversial of modern TV shows on the Netflix streaming network. Not much Star Trek discussion here! Maybe we're not actually fans ourselves, but we take a break to discuss this risky an...

The glorious conclusion! ...To the beginning of DS9's third season and the new paradigm. Things have gone poorly for the defiant in the gamma quadrant, and Odo and Kira hang out with Odo's family of melty beige Eric Trumps. Luckily Sisko and the rest of the senior staff have made it back to the station... or have they? STAR TREK DEEP SPACE NINE IS BETTER THAN LOST! More voice mails! Let us know yo...

Welcome to Season Three of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine! What happened in between seasons? Ch ch ch changes! The Defiant is finally here! New cast members? Who is and who isn’t here to make friends? Stepping on Odo's ... feelings. This episode is well paced. Again, reflecting on S2 problems. How long until we get Majel Barret's voice on our digital assistant devices? Sisko scenes. Jake scenes Jadzia...

Special Guest episode! Going forward as we have less "things we would change," and fantasies of "fixing" episodes of a 20 year old tv show. Instead, we want to hear more from you, our listeners! 917-408-3898 With that in mind, we welcome DS9 fan (who happens to be married to Wade’s brother), Courtney Bowen to the podcast. Topics discussed: It is a compliment to say you resemble Kira Nerys! Is Pica...

Cutting the chaff! We narrow it down to the best episodes of season 2. The three of us each pick out 12 episodes to make our ideal streamlined "modern" season two What works and doesn’t work about what we've seen this season? Is O’Brien the “Kirk” of Star Trek Deep Space Nine now? Just what the heck are they doing with Avery Brooks? Can they figure out the Sisko? [yes] James’ arc of appreciation f...

Things get Real. The show we love really begins! Not that we didn’t love [some] of what came before, but if you’re a long time DS9 fan you know what we’re talking about, and if you’re new to the show or watching along with us… GET EXCITED. What big info about Captain Mike Pence does Wade insist James hold back from the beginning of the podcast? A terribly obscure hint lies in the first episode of...

O'brien Must Suffer! Does this one hit too close to home in 2016? We find a lot to talk about in this Kafka-esque Cardassian episode. You want to hear debates about absurdism vs expressionism, right? But also: More James' nipple corner! [Hint: It's O'brien again] Is this at all similar to Picard's Cardassian torture episode from Star Trek: The Next Generation, homoerotically? [Hint: Well, that kin...

Politics and Religion: Just what the people want from Star Trek, right? Do they want it from DS9? Kai Ratched has a plot! Robot Pope has a secret! Did he make a dude pull a Judas and hang himself on the promenade of Deep Space Nine? But really, we have bigger things to talk about. Like an exciting new segment: James' Nipple Corner! But even more pressing: Why can’t the dumb Bajorans just be more l...

Who loves the Mirror Universe? Hugh sure hates the mirror universe. James is not fond of the mirror universe. Wade loves the mirror universe. It’s another long one! We spend some time up front setting up the mirror universe, going back to the original Star Trek series episode, “Mirror Mirror” before going full bore into Kira trying to romance herself and just what the heck is going on. Does it mak...

Shipping Garak & Bashir! Continuing our coverage of back to back "very special episodes!" Finally we learn more of Garak's backstory? Or do we? Garak has a medical issue and Julian just can't quit him! We get discuss 3 different stories Garak tells, Odo's authoritarian leanings, and the logistics of surprise trips to Cardassian territory; Just what kind of bad-assery strains one's credulity of the...

A Double sized issue! Federation Terrorists! Instead of one Star Trek episode split into two podcasts, this week we're giving you an extra long podcast with two DS9 episodes crammed in! But hey it's one story. The first 20 minutes or so we cover some backstory and origins back in a few The Next Generation episodes. Where does the term "Maquis" come from? Wade says "metaplot" too many times. Does D...

Jean-Claude Van... Dax? The prelude is over, we're finally getting down and dirty with Blood Oath proper. Is this the greatest episode ever, or the Star Trek equivalent of a Cannon film? Are those two descriptors mutually exclusive? Is Jadzia Dax right to uphold the blood oath of Kurzon Dax? Can her fellow officers aboard DS9 ever look her in the eye again after she agrees to straight up murder a...

It's a Very Special Episode! Instead of jumping straight into the events of the next episode of Deep Space Nine we take a detour and ruminate on Klingons past; from the past of the original Star Trek series, to an older yet "more recent" past of Enterprise, and the past of three Klingons in particular: Kor, Koloth, and Kang. Just how different are these Klingons on DS9 from their portrayals on TOS...

Quarksablanca! Quark: The George Clooney of Ferengi. How grossed out are you by Ferengi/Cardassian makeouts? What’s the deal with Natima Lang's students? Are they the weakest terrorist ever? Things get contentious. The most disagreement we’ve had so far on the podcast. Though, we can all agree Garak is great. Listeners, just how murky was this episode? Let us know what you think!

Initiate Arjin visits DS9 to whine! A baby universe. Voles! Jadzia gets an intern, or a trill up for joining who is surprised by the unorthodox Dax. Finally the "Is Jadzia Kurzon?" question is settled. Wade makes the argument this episode can serve as a meta-commentary on the character herself. OH, and there's a proto universe that gets batted around by muppet skinless cats. Are the moral implicat...

Welcome to Space Mayberry! It's NOT a next generation rewrite? Go figure. Odo and Dax land on a planet that is NOT a TNG script. Quark is running shenanigans while Odo is gone. Will Kira get her swerve on? Yes she will. We love this writer, we... well, this ain't a bad episode.

Cool Hand Benjamin. Sisko and O’Brien crash land on a planet of space Luddites. More Space Amish? Nope. Space hippy cultists. But did this episode have a point that could have been explored more? Classic trek, where a Captain- er commander- is tortured to see what he is made of. But it’s not Cardassian torture this time- for once! We discuss how other captains might have dealt with the situation....

Things aren't what they seem for O'Brien. Is this a M. Night Sham, or is it like that Rick and Morty episode? Maybe Parallax View, or a certain most famous of scifi noirs? Just how would this plot play out as an episode of The Americans? Oh it's a mystery! Or is it? We slide stealthily into a nerd corner conversation on teleporters and cloning. Can Hugh get over his dislike for Colm Meaney's furro...

More O'Brien and Bashir bromancing. Two races with ridiculous hair are the worsts hosts ever. How do they repay a favor? Kill the guys doing you a solid. Not cool, bro. After getting rid of what we're told is the ultimate doomsday weapon -but that appears a run of the mill biological weapon, with a name that doesn't describe what it does at all- Miles and Julian hide out in a bunker. Surprisingly...

Odo's Dad! (kinda) Is this a horror movie? Father issues, the stuff popular filmed entertainment is made of! What happens when the DS9 crew goes to an abandoned planet, brings back an obelisk, and then tries to give every cast member a defining line while trying to recreate The Thing, or Alien? Does that screw up the third act? Wade does his damnedest to defend this episode.