Just Ask Your Mom

The science of caregiving--yes, there's research behind it!--is beginning to shed light on what it means to give and receive care (to children, parents, others), and how it changes us. Despite the prominent narrative in our culture that caregiving is a burden and detracts from higher aims, the evidence tells a different story. The Unexpected Magic of Caring for Others by Elissa Straus

We're answering a listener's question about what to do when your parents (the grandparents) dismiss or disagree with how you're raising your children. Looking at both sides of the coin, we reveal some of what could lie behind this behavior and ways to help the situation.

A familiar childhood complaint --that's not fair!--actually holds more nuance than we might think. What's the difference between fairness, justice, equality and equity? How do you handle it when your kid complains that something's not fair?

If Santa is a part of your Christmas traditions, there's a good chance your kids will visit him & Mrs. Claus at some point. Maybe that's for pictures or perhaps it's just to let Santa know their fondest wish. We've got some best practices and pro tips for visits to the jolly guy in red.

Is Santa just a magical given at your house, or does the whole Santa story give you pause? Are childhood "characters" lying to your children? Join us for a jolly conversation about St. Nick and some options for his place in the holidays.

Before the comprehensive book of baby names, how did parents choose names for their children? What's in a name anyway? What goes into choosing a name today? This episode might make you think twice before filling out that birth certificate!

All parents will face situations where our children need correction. The parenting interwebs offer a wide range of opinion on just how to do that. What IS discipline anyway and what does it look like? How does it differ from punishment, and what does it look like when we model our parenting after God's heart for us?

We move pretty fast in American society. There's so much to do and so much to take in. What's the real pace of childhood and can it teach us something as harried (and hurried) parents? How much down time should you (can you) actually have? The Hurried Child by David Elkind has its 25th anniversary this year.

Earlier this year, the term kinkeeping exploded. What is it and who tends to do it? We're talking about the emotional and organizational labor involved in keeping family connections strong, from being active in the group text to orchestrating the annual holiday family reunion. Is this a gendered role or one that anyone can do?

Sometimes it's helpful to step back from our day-to-day as parents and see what sort of role we're taking on with our kids. If we have a broader perspective, a view from 30,000 feet, say, we might learn a bit about our approach and whether it's serving us or our kids the way we want it to. Is your approach one of "ownership" or "ambassadorship"?

Halloween is a huge holiday with consumers, with billions spent each year. We're talking about our own Halloween experiences and where we've landed these days with trick-or-treating. Where does Halloween come from anyway? Does it matter if or how we celebrate it?

Jessica Patay, a mom of 3 from Los Angeles, CA, isn't fearless. But she is brave. She's formed a support organization and completed an anthology of stories from moms like her, moms whose expectations of motherhood turned out differently from what they'd imagined. One of her sons has Prater-Willi syndrome, a genetic disorder that they've learned to not only live with, but that h...

Older children need different guidance. There are some real transitions going on between parenting an elementary aged child and an adolescent/teen--for both parents and kids. They should be gaining responsibility and earning some freedom, while parents shift from directive guidance to a more influential role. We talk about many of those transitions and some of the issues that arise during these so...

The gig of motherhood. If we do it right and all goes according to plan, we end up with children who leave and make their own way in the world. It's the most all consuming thing for parents aannnddd then it isn't. On this episode, we're reflecting on what the empty nest felt like initially and how it's going.

Attorney and mom, Melissa Hogan, wrote the first book of its kind when her son was handed a challenging diagnosis. As she's navigated the health care system and learned how to care for her son and herself in the process, Melissa recognized the need to help all parents prevent and manage medical trauma. In our conversation she talks through some practical and surprising things parents can do w...

One of the first major transitions a child has is the first day of school. We talk to two seasoned kindergarten teachers who give us great tips on what's really important for kids to know and practice before they start school, and some helpful advice for parents, too. Kindergarten is about way more than learning letters and numbers. How do you know when your child is ready?

Grocery prices have skyrocketed and the average family struggles to afford feeding their family every week. Mandy is a real-life, regular mom who has figured it out. She's got easy and delicious meal plans with shopping lists and normal ingredients for busy families--even if cooking isn't your thing. We tried some of her recipes and gave them two thumbs UP!! Plandy Mandy Meal Plans LISTE...

Student debt can be a hot button subject! We wanted to see how it looked from a student's point of view. This episode is our conversation with a student recently out of grad school, with the student loans to prove it. Savannah Cunningham (Bonnie's daughter) taught us a thing or two and offers some on-the-ground tips for families with high school or college students navigating the minefie...

Many of us have looping tapes playing in our heads with a soundtrack that's largely negative. With a little practice and some small habits, we can arrest these toxic thoughts before they gain a foothold and hijack our relationships, success, and joy. And, we can teach our kiddos early on how to do this, too!

How we tell our stories determines how we see ourselves and the world. How do we frame a failure or diappointment? How do we recount a struggle? But it's not just all about the spin. In this episode, our conversation covers learning how to tell better, truer stories in order to find those glimmers of joy. Marcus Warner's book: The Four Habits of Joy-Filled People

In this third episode of our Joy series, we look at the difference between living from a fear-based perspective and one based on joy. We walk through some easy-to-practice skills you (and your kids!) can do to learn the power of appreciation and get back on the path to emotional regulation and calm. Marcus Warner's book: The Four Habits of Joy-Filled People

In this episode, part 2 of our joy series, we're talking about the first habit we can practice to move out of our "fear house" and into our "joy house." When we feel out of control -- like a toddler whose emotions are all over the place-- there are things we can do to quiet our bodies. Being calm isn't simply a matter of will or choice. When someone simply tells us to...

We hear the slogan "choose joy" tossed around a lot, but is that even possible? In this upcoming series we're unpacking a few habits that we can practice--and help our children practice to get a headstart on things!--to unearth more joy in our lives. Simple and quick habits anyone can do. Four Habits of Joy-Filled People: 15 Minute Brain Science Hacks to a More Connected and Satisfy...

This 2-part interview with Traci Condra details her 15+ year marriage with her husband, Kyle, who struggled for years with worsening anger and rage. After years of prayer and counseling, Traci and their two daughters found themselves at a low point, wondering if this was just what life would be like. Then, the But God moment. National Domestic Abuse Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE. Why Does He Do That?...

This 2-part interview with Traci Condra details her 15+ year marriage with her husband, Kyle, who struggled for years with worsening anger and rage. After years of prayer and counseling, Traci and their two daughters found themselves at a low point, wondering if this was just what life would be like. National Domestic Abuse Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE. Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft